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 Category:  General Script
  Posted: December 5, 2019      Views: 38

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Retired Marine; retired high school teacher; married 34 years; father of three; five grandchildren; one rescue granddog.

He is a top ranked author at the #10 position.

He is an accomplished novelist and is currently at the #23 spot on the rankings.

He is an accomplished script writer and is currently at the #3 spot on the rankings.

He is an accomplished poet and is currently at the #43 spot on this years rankings.

He is also an active reviewer and is holding the #11 spot on the top ranked reviewer list.

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one scene script
"Scene at a Christmas Shop 8 CC" by Bill Schott


DED: What have you done with Ned, Red?
D-Red: Am I my cousin's keeper?
DED: You look sleepy, Red.
(Red crumples into a heap in front of Ded.)
DED = Death / Spectre of Christmas yet to come
Red = Himself
Pez = Santa / Spectre of Christmas present
Pallas = Ringo / Spectre of Christmas past
Pons = Himself
Ned = assorted characters

Scene opens with Santa Claus sitting in a decorated throne. Red approaches from a line of mannequin children standing in a line.

Pez: Ho ho, Red.

Red: You still playing Santa I see. Getting any juicy asks from these depraved youths?

Pez: I'm the ghost of Christmas present, Red. 

Red:  Gotcha. So I'm here to see how awful I am. 

Pez:  Let's look at a scene this morning at Ned's house.

Red: Great. I can imagine him wearing his Hee Haw pajamas while eating Cheerios with a knife.

Scene shifts to stage left. Ned is standing beside a dining room table. He's wearing only an adult diaper and reading a list out loud.

Ned: So glad I kepted my Valentimers list from Valentimers Day. That's makin' doin' these Christmassy cards a bunch easier. God bless'm ev'ry one. Hope the warshin's done soon so's I kin git dressed proper. At least git my Hee Haw jammies on.

Pez:  There's Ned, making out his Christmas card list.

Red:  Oh good. I like getting cards so I can put them IN my fireplace. 

Pez: You are on his list, Red. 

Red: Yeah?  He's on my list too. Let's see: Put laxative in some hamburger and give it to the neighbors lap dog; take the rubber blades off Pons' windshield wipers; pepper spray the pool towels down at the Y; and -- oh yeah -- take any opportunity to remind Ned he's a dummy. 

Pez: You're an evil bully, Red. You go out of your way to inflict harm on people.

Red:  Pa- leeeez!  Who are you to tell me anything, Pez? Your sordid past makes me look like Pippi Longstocking.

Pez: That's a good point for you to make, Pippi. I guess if I were in your place, I wouldn't want me pissed at me. Unfortunately for you, that's not the case. 

Red: Look, Santa, I don't give a rat's patoot what you think. I've got friends who will protect me from a stooge-lover like you. 

Pez:  I think we're done here, Red. I'm putting you on my naughty list. 

Red: So I'll get coal in my stocking, I guess.

Pez:  I was thinking concrete. (
looking past Red to a figure behind him)  Looks like your blast to the past is here, douche.

DED: (
stepping up)  Time to go, Red. 

Red: Hey! Where's that cool red robe I had? (
then falls asleep standing up, is turned and walked off stage)

Pez: (opens a green sack and pulls out a red cloak)  Ho ho hooooo.

To be continued...


Author Notes
Image from Google

CC = Christmas Carol
Pays one point and 2 member cents.

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