I Woke Up a Little Different by AliMom
Someone Else writing prompt entry
Artwork by Renate-Bertodi at FanArtReview.com
The first thing I am going to do when I get out of this bed again is figure out how this happened. I didn't ask for it. Didn't want it. Never dreamed of it. A Disney princess! How am I going to explain this to my wife? Oh, the kids will love it, especially little Kendra and Ebony. The boys, not so much.|
Could it have been that fiftieth watching of "Frozen"? I'd learned all of the lyrics. I had to. I have two little girls. "C'mon Daddy watch it with us again. One more time." So of course, I knew all of the characters. I could sing "Let it Go" from memory without a hitch but so could everyone else - in seventeen languages. The radio played that song to death. Who didn't know the lyrics? But was I Olaf or Kristoff? No, I'm a princess. Elsa or Anna? I'm down with Elsa 'cause then I could freeze things. What am I saying? And why is this happening to me?!
I mean if I have to be a Disney princess, if I had to pick, I would have gone for that let her hair down chick. What was her name again? Rapunzel! Or Pocahantas with that weird talking to the trees and animals thing going on. At least they had superpowers. I'd have some cool super magic stuff happening.
I'd have to reject Snow White. Too helpless and too dumb. How many times does someone have to try to kill you before you figure out the meaning of "stranger danger"? I don't want to share a room with seven guys either. I did that already growing up. That's why I worked hard to become successful. I'm not going back there. I ain't about kissing no frogs or dancing hairy beasts either. See previous note about family, so, yeah, those are no-gos.
Why is this happening to me? My wife didn't change as far as I know. And our next-door neighbor has four children - all girls! We've shared princess movies. Why hasn't he changed? Or maybe he has and I just haven't seen him yet! Oh darn! I've caught my lacy silk dress on the bedpost. Aaah! Where are my pajamas?
Okay, think! I know all the princesses because I've had to endure them all. The red-head with the bow and arrow, she's cool. At least I could defend myself. Cinderella could run. Might've been a track star if she hadn't tripped up on those glass slippers. Now, that's proper. But a chick laying around for some guy to kiss her so she can wake up? Come on. She's not even the girls' favorite! That's it! That's who I am. Aurora. Watch out for spinning wheels. Watch out for needles! Oh, what lovely tapered fingers. What graceful hands. Stop it! Pull yourself together you lunatic.
And I'm white! I mean, I'm beautiful and all but when I went to bed last night, I was a forty-two-year-old black man -with dreadlocks. When I look in the mirror that's not who's looking back. Where's my beard? Where's my mustache? Where's my skin? My complexion is dewy and glowing... What am I saying? This is crazy.
I tried singing a little Snoop-Dog and what came out? Ha-ha-ha-ha and laddy da da, and a bunch of birds flew in the window and attacked me. They tried to sit on my shoulders and sing along. Deer stuck their heads in my window and rabbits and squirrels started dancing on the dresser. Ridiculous.
I'm afraid to get up but I'm afraid to go back to sleep. What if I don't wake up this time, waiting around for some guy I've never met to figure out that the solution is true love's kiss - a hundred years later. Oh, I tell you my wife will never understand.
Okay, okay, calm down. You can deal with this. You are a top-level executive in a very prestigious firm. You helped build that firm from the ground up. You are a problem solver. Get up and look in that mirror and come up with a solution!
No-o-o! I'm animated!!
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