Not so hot. by jaydub99
I walked into the cacophony of the room, my nostrils pleasantly assaulted by the aroma of freshly brewed coffee and the smell of pastries. I stood in line as several young ladies swarmed around the espresso machine like pissed off hornets. I waited my turn, I was patient.
As I ascended to the front of the line, I prepared to order my usual Starbucks fare. A venti, non fat, latte. Fairly simple really, not like the pretentious claptrap I have heard requested in these places. So often I have heard an obnoxious litany of requests from assorted sticky beaks that are searching for caffeine Eden. I refuse to get pretentious about a cup of coffee but I know what I enjoy. I like milk and I like coffee. What really gets me excited is when they are mixed together. I readied myself to order when I remembered that the Baristas here at 'Bucks are trained to present the Java at a temperature roughly that of molten lead. I smiled at the young lady taking my order and asked her to please cool it down a little, take the heat down a peg. She looked at me and in a loud voice said, "You want that TEMPAD?" I was stunned. I had just been hit in the face by a smelly, oily fish. I nodded at her. "Ahhh, yea....sure." I knew what she meant. I stood over to the side and waited for Einstein to make my tempad drink. I was screaming inside my head. Tepid! Tepid, you idiot, the word is Tepid. You know lukewarm, slightly cooled. I was furious. I was incensed. Hovered just this side of aggravated. If you are going to say the word, you should know what it means. You should use it correctly. What was wrong with this girl? Was she not paying attention in High School?
I popped out of my self-righteous fog as my drink appeared on the ledge next to the coffee machine. I smiled at the young lady. I grabbed the cup around the sleeve and hoisted it up. The Master of All Literary Phrases looked me in the eye and said, "Here ya go sir...one venti....non fat...tempad latte."
I just smiled. I felt the weight of the liquid. I crooked my neck and took a pull of the coffee. Mmmmmmm, it was creamy. It was perfectly blended coffee and milk. It was just the right temperature, a balanced 140 degrees. It was absolutely delicious. Man, she was good and by all accounts really knew her craft. By all examinations it was the perfect cup of coffee.
I might just have to reconsider this whole affair. You know, maybe it was tempad.
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