- Scene at a Pink-skied Planetby Bill Schott
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a one scene script
Scene at a Pink-skied Planet by Bill Schott

The scene opens on a desert landscape. There is a thumbnail moon in the pink sky. Two men stand face to face holding a rabbit. They each seem to be struggling to get the animal away from the other man.

Man1: Unhand my son, sir!

Man2: It's a bunny, Bart.

Man1: Flesh of my flesh.

Man2: It's a rodent,

Man1: His name is Ralph.

Man2: His name is dinner.

Man1: This planet has changed my son into a bunny.

Man2: No. This planet has affected your mind, Bart.

Man1: He's not my son?

Man2: No, he's not.

Man1: He's a rabbit?

Man2: No, Bart.

Man1: What is he?

Rabbit: (
Disembodied voice) It's me, Bart. Butch.

Man1: (
Looking at the other man) Butch?

Man2: (
Smiling) Yes, my friend.

Rabbit: No, Bart. He's not me. I'm me. He's -- the rabbit.

Man1: (
Looking at the other man) You're the rabbit?

Man2: Do I look like a rabbit, Bert?

Man1: Ah ha! You called me Bert. My name is Bart, Rabbit.

Man2: What are you talking about, Bert? Your name isn't Bart.

Rabbit: Yes, Bart, Your name is Bart. You are Bart. I am Butch.

Man1: (
Looking at the other man) You're not Butch. You're a rabbit.

Man2: Well, of course, Bert. We're both rabbits.

Man1: We are?

Rabbit: You are?

Man2: Yes. We are the rabbits of Lepus 5.

Man1: We're the rabbits of Lepus 5.

Man2: We are the Rappin' Rabbits of Remus 5.

Man1: You mean Lepus 5?

Man2: You're confusing us with the Leapin' Lizards of Lepus 5.

Rabbit:  He is?

I'm a Rappin' Rabbit from Remus 5
finger poppin'
planet hoppin'
on this desert ball we're stoppin'

Man1: Wait! Butch? Why are we here?

Rabbit: Hey, Bert!  It's me -- Bart.

Man2: Hey, Bart.

Man1: But -- I'm Bart.

Man2: No, you're Butch.

Man1: I'm Butch?

Man2: Yes, Butch.  We're all Butches.

Rabbit: No. I'm Bart.

Man1: Hey! Did this rabbit just say something?

Man2: (
Grabs the rabbit and wrings its neck)  Yeah. It said --Eat me!

Man1: Right on, Butch.

Man2: You got it, Butch.

Man1 and Man2:
We're the Leapin' Lizards from Lepus 5
eatin' bunny
it's so funny
on this desert ball so sunny

The two men continue rapping as they pull the rabbit apart.



© Copyright 2011 Bill Schott All rights reserved.
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