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43 total reviews
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Comment by | | Premier Author | | | Premier Reader | | | Poet Rating
 Rank: 12 | Author Rating For Short Works
 | Author Rating For Novels
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 Rank: 23 | | | |
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Comment by | | Beyond the Mirror | | | An indepth look into the soul | | | Poet Rating
| Author Rating For Short Works
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Rating of Chapter 3 - Pulled Along By the Tug of the Fates
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Really liked this. Very well written, and funny at times. Was too involved to check for sprags. Knowing you, it probably is none. Smile.
I smile at his audacity. "I'm fucking sticking you up, Autry! You expect me to give you my name?"[LOL]
One thing remains. It is not of this day. It is not of any day. Nor is it at all connected with time in my mind. But it remains, nonetheless, drifting inexorably, as timeless as stars, as solidly rooted as myth and symbol. Unresisting, it is one with the force that pulls it along, unerringly, until it drops off into that boundless, borderless eternal.
I watch it drift through my mind with dread and longing. [Great ending paragraphy and line.}
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Comment Written 28-Jun-2015 |
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reply by the author on 29-Jun-2015
Thanks, Ama. I'm glad it resonated with you. I think more FanStorians have enjoyed this short story than any I've posted. The next one will be less intense with the viewpoint character being about 10 years old. Again, thanks.
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Comment by| 2019 Novelist of the Year | | | Premier Author | | | Premier Reader | | | Poet Rating
Rank: 79 | Author Rating For Short Works
| Author Rating For Novels
Rank: 4 | Review Stars
Rank: 50 | | | |
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Comment by | | Premier Author | | | 2013 #2 Ranked Novelist | | | Poet Rating
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Comment by | | Premier Author | | | Premier Reader | | | Poet Rating
Rank: 128 | Author Rating For Short Works
Rank: 18 | Author Rating For Novels
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Rank: 81 | | | |
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Comment by | | The goal in life is to be better today | | | than you were yesterday. | | | Poet Rating
Rank: 68 | Author Rating For Short Works
Rank: 14 | Author Rating For Novels
Rank: 18 | Script Rating
Rank: 1 | Review Stars
Rank: 27 | | | |
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Comment by | | | | | | Poet Rating
| Author Rating For Short Works
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 Rank: 210 | | | |
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Rating of Chapter 3 - Pulled Along By the Tug of the Fates
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stupidly, childishly cruel?
(yeah, I wondered the same. It's weird to watch.)
"I needed it to stick you up and get the schooner."
(I paused here. The logic .... poor Autry.)
I'm fucking robbing from you."
(why not? If Buster is robbing him for something he could have paid for, seems perfectly sensible Autry should be able to make a gift of it.)
Sitting at the curb, I lay the schooner beside me[,] while removing my sneakers and socks. (no comma, I don't think)
Now, I wonder if it's losing its fine edge. : 0 <-- that was my face, I think.
Well, I think my reaction to the end of this story can only be expressed in an analogy. I am a princess. This story is layered beneath 19 mattresses. And as I lie above all the layers, I will not get a good night's sleep, it cannot be ignored, and the fact that the effect is there does not make sense.
This story is a phase click to the right, such that it itches my bones. Parts of my brain wrap around and ... other parts want to shake it off like, like an unexpected piece of algae in a swimming pool that clings to your arm, and you weren't expecting it and there's a shudder and physical jerking. It's a good thing grungy brad pit pulled off this ... thing ... this, off one phase click to the right.
I could see this in published setting. I could see an editor, or whatever big pants, stuck in that hesitant pause of ... what just happened here ... was I just too beneath the vision ... or did that just boggle my brain with warped logic into making sense.
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Comment Written 26-Jun-2015 |
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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2015
Now, I wonder if it's losing its fine edge. : 0 <-- that was my face, I think. [I thing you're heart's in the graphic novel! Hee-hee.]
This story is a phase click to the right, such that it itches my bones. Parts of my brain wrap around and ... other parts want to shake it off like, like an unexpected piece of algae in a swimming pool that clings to your arm, [So... you kinda like it, but you don't like kinda liking it? Or of course, the reverse.
I would love to get this into the hands of such an editor, to boggle his brain with this warped logic--and don't think I'm not aware that it's warped. It's never made complete sense to me.
Turtle, you amaze when you take me along with your journey of discovery, and brilliant though the journey is, when it's through I need to look up and see the glow of the chartreuse cross to assure myself you liked it. I'll take it as a yes! Thank you my dear Turtle.
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reply by --Turtle. on 27-Jun-2015
It's very hard to describe my reaction. I both really liked it, and really wanted to throw it across the room, and really liked that I wanted to throw it. I'm starting to think if I owned a bound Anthology from you, it would have to be very well-bound as it would be thrown many times, because I would want to throw it. And I don't mean that as an insult, because if I didn't like it, it would be gently placed aside and forgotten.
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reply by the author on 27-Jun-2015
Great! At least I'll count on your buying the bound copy!
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