Contact Us | En español    
         Join today or login

Status

New Here?
Sign Up
Fast! Three Questions.

Already a member?
Login

Contests

My Faith
Deadline: In 4 Days

Halloween Flash Fiction
Deadline: In 5 Days

Halloween Poetry
Deadline: In 5 Days

Haiku
Deadline: Nov 2nd

Dribble Flash Fiction
Deadline: Nov 4th


Writing Classes

0 classes available. Click here locate a class and to learn more.

Rank

Poet: None
Author: None
Novel: None
Reviewer:None
Votes: None






Reviews from
The Search


The lady's escape becomes a countrywide search

  2 total reviews 
Comment by
Ben B.
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  53
Review Stars
  Rank:  41
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 9 -
Evidence found
Why is the word "Dismounting!" in an exclamation? I don't think that's how narration works in third person. Interesting how Garth died. Interesting story.


 Comment Written 13-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 13-Oct-2020
    Thank you for stopping by to review this chapter. I'll take a look at the word you referenced. I always appreciate constructive critique.
Comment by
Michael Ludwinder
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  61
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 9 -
Evidence found
Very nicely done. I think you have done a great job with your descriptions. I could see this in my head. The story is interesting and the pacing is solid. The story doesn't feel rushed. Well written!


 Comment Written 13-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 13-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Michael, for taking the time to review Chapter nine. I appreciate your review.
Comment by
Michael Ludwinder
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  61
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 8 -
Disbanding
This is a strong chapter. I really enjoyed the story. Your pacing is excellent (this doesn't feel rushed) and the story is interesting. Great use of dialogue as well. Wonderful story.


 Comment Written 13-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 13-Oct-2020
    Thank you Michael for stopping by to review chapter 8. I do appreciate your review.
Comment by
Iza Deleanu
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  103
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  10
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  10
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  12
 

#10 Ranked Author

#10 Ranked Novelist
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 8 -
Disbanding
You have a little bit of everything in this chapter: medical advice, army strategy, realignment of the goals, and hope. Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter.


 Comment Written 10-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 10-Oct-2020
    Thank you for stopping by and for your kind review.
Comment by
Ben B.
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  53
Review Stars
  Rank:  41
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 7 -
No sign of the Lady
Isn't Fantasia the name of a Disney film? Other than that I liked this story, a very classic fairy tale setting here. Oh and I love my ale so put it in a mug ???


 Comment Written 09-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 09-Oct-2020
    Thank you for stopping by with your critic. lol It could be a Disney film. It's be a long time since I watched a Disney movie. I'll check it...I can always change it in the book. Thanks!
Comment by
beizanten
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  285
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Rating of Chapter 7 -
No sign of the Lady
A well written first paragraph, the sense of urgency is thick. A well written and interesting plotline. I like how you describe the character situation and action


 Comment Written 08-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 08-Oct-2020
    Thank you for taking the time to review Chapter 7. I enjoyed creating it. Do stop by again.
Comment by
Nika2016
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  715
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 6 -
Return to the cave
Interesting story. Rather than die, I think he wants her to change identities...leaving all behind.
I felt it was too short..
The reader wants more.
xxxxxxxxxxxx


 Comment Written 25-Jul-2016



reply by the author on 25-Jul-2016
    Thanks Nika for your comments and your excellent rating. Please stop by again soon.
Comment by
Hayley Solomon
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 6 -
Return to the cave
This sounds like a lovely medieval romance piece, possibly in the Gothic style. High drama, a damsel distress, a ready hero... ou have all the elements.However, I think there is some confusion in voicing. Sometimes first person I is your hero, sometimes it becomes the heroine. This makes for a slight discord in understanding that I am sure is relatively minor to fix.


 Comment Written 25-Jul-2016



reply by the author on 25-Jul-2016
    Thanks Hayley for your constructive comments and excellent rating. Please stop by again soon.
Comment by
Juliette Chamberlain
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 5 -
A Secret Journey
Interesting story line which makes me want to understand more about the background.
What has made Lady Lenore decide to live in a cave rather than a castle?
You develop the story well.


'...the (bowls) bowels of the earth...'
'Devonshire.' All one word.



Warmly,

Juliette


 Comment Written 18-Jun-2016



reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
    Thank you for your kind words and the excellent rating. Suggested editing will be done.
Comment by
nassus1957
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 5 -
A Secret Journey
Stories about castles, kings, queens, prince and princess are always magical and will attract any readers curiosity like you did here. The adventures and fantastic scenes or episodes will be looked forward to by the expectant readers. Thanks for sharing.


 Comment Written 18-Jun-2016



reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
    Thank you for your kind words and your excellent rating.
  -1-   Next Page 


Market your book.
Advertising options.
Football Chapter 3 part 2
A mother faces life's struggles.


Share or Bookmark
  Contact Us | En español | Advertise With Us

© 2015 FanStory.com, Inc. All Rights Reserved. Terms under which this service is provided to you. Privacy