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Reviews from
Assassin Nation


A sequel to the novel Baker's Dozen

  7 total reviews 
Comment by
2019 Novelist of the Year
Ulla
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  Rank:  95
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  Rank:  2
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  Rank:  45
 

#2 Ranked Novelist
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Rating of Chapter 15 -
Secret Investigations
Hi Bill, this sounds complicated and I'm not sure who's alive and who's dead. Has the president been killed? or am I all wrong. When you start quoting the Bible I get really confused as I'm not religious, at all. All best. Ulla:))


 Comment Written 20-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 20-Oct-2019
    Ben Baker was our hero and C.C. Connor the villain.
    Now we know Baker is really Bobby Do, an assassin.
    Samantha Anthra is a sociopath who would kill all day long, but is kept normal through mind control.
    Manuel Kontroz is a quirky genius investigator who has a messiah complex and is borderline sociopathic. He is outside the inner sanctum of covert activity, but trying find out things that will get him killed.

reply by Ulla on 21-Oct-2019
    Thanks a lot, Bill, for clarifying all this to me. Now I think I understand. All best. Ulla:))
Comment by
nomi338
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Rating of Chapter 15 -
Secret Investigations
Hunh? I am so confused. It should be obvious by name that I am not swift enough to keep up with all the intrigue. It is early Sunday morning and I am still groggy from sleep. Not an excuse, but a statement of fact. Please explain so that this dullard might get a clue.


 Comment Written 20-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 20-Oct-2019
    Connor has been training assassins in the Midwest and now has a small army who are staged around the world waiting to act. He has had the President killed and replaced with his man, the VP.

    Ben Baker is back, alive, but isn?t, and has never been, Ben Baker. He is Bobby Do, son of another assassin.

    Connor has a twin sister who is a congresswoman from California. She is also the mother of Samantha Anthra, who murdered the President.

    Manuel Kontroz is still investigating the training area incident, as he is not in the loop of conspirators. He is deeply spiritual, in his own way, and is developing a messiah complex. He and Baker are as close to heroes as we have gotten.


reply by nomi338 on 21-Oct-2019
    I'm up on most of the happenings, it's just that I got lost temporarily.
Comment by
Mystic Angel 7777
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Rating of Chapter 15 -
Secret Investigations
This is well penned with no evidence of SPAG to be had. The storyline progresses in a logical manner making it easy to follow. The ending was well executed as it leaves the reader with a compelling and lingering quote to ponder. Well done and thank you very much for sharing it.


 Comment Written 20-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 20-Oct-2019
    Thanks, MA
Comment by
lyenochka
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  Rank:  5
 

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Rating of Chapter 15 -
Secret Investigations
Boy, that Kontroz guy is creepy. He does quote Scripture well though but somehow not in a very spiritual way. I liked the spooky what that Guninder speaks in italics. I guess it's echoing in Kontoz's mind.


 Comment Written 20-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 20-Oct-2019
    He is the left-handed nut in a drawer of ring-wing loose screws. Gee, I need to write that down.
Comment by
Ricky1024
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  Rank:  55
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  Rank:  16
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  Rank:  17
 
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Rating of Chapter 15 -
Secret Investigations
"Secret Investigations"
Was well written rich in Theme and Imagery.
...
It read well and Flowed well with no Grammar Issues as well.
...
Adjective and Objective Contents were both Excellent and Exceptional while Descriptive Measures aligned Perfectly.
Thanks,
Doctor Ricky 1024


 Comment Written 19-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
    Thanks, Ricky
Comment by
Patty Palmer
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  Rank:  28
 
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Rating of Chapter 15 -
Secret Investigations
Unfortunately, this is the first chapter of your book that I have come across. What I did read, set the chapter up for me to be ready to watch for further chapters. Good job so far! **********"Keep right on writing!"**********
Patty


 Comment Written 19-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
    Thanks, Patty, for checking this out. If you check out a couple of chapters back, I have some catch-up summaries that will help bring you into the thrust of the story.
Comment by
Elaine Chiodi
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Rating of Chapter 15 -
Secret Investigations
Very intriguing. Even though it seems a bit complicated, it definitely sounds like politics as usual. The dialog flows well, and ends on a complex note that leaves the reader wanting more. ...ec


 Comment Written 19-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 19-Oct-2019
    Thank you, Elaine.
Comment by
brenda faye curtis
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Rating of Chapter 12 -
Reunion
While this is well written and interesting, it's been so long since I read a chapter, I've lost some details of the story. I went back to read previous chapters, but the last one's missing, and I'm just a little lost now, despite having read some earlier ones. I'll try again later.


 Comment Written 02-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
    Thanks, Brenda, for giving it a look.

reply by brenda faye curtis on 04-Oct-2019
    You're welcome, Bill.
Comment by
kahpot
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  Rank:  53 (+2)
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  Rank:  63
 
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Rating of Chapter 12 -
Reunion
Another great read, I will have to go back for a refresher I think as I couldn't stop thinking about the fight between the twins as my last read, though this story/chapter is familiar, I like the change of font for the talking and thinking of the characters, very well written****kahpot


 Comment Written 02-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 02-Oct-2019
    Thank you, kahpot, I actually need to rewrite this chapter as I accidentally put it in scene form instead of conventional story.
Comment by
2019 Novelist of the Year
Ulla
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  Rank:  95
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#2 Ranked Novelist
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Rating of Chapter 12 -
Reunion
Hi Bill, I'm a bit confused here. It's a great story and the dialogue is great, as well. But what I can't figure out is whether this is supposed to be a script. If so it lacks a bit as far as I know. All best. Ulla:)))


 Comment Written 01-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 01-Oct-2019
    Yes, I know. I had come off a script scene for aprons and Ned and began this with that in mind. It obviously can?t be a story or a script scene in this hybrid form. What about the story?

reply by Ulla on 01-Oct-2019
    I think it's a great story and it has a lot going for it. So keep writing. But you have to make a decision whether it's a script or a piece of prose. LOL
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