Unexpected Arirval
Anna's condition becomes life threatening.
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Reviews from
It Should be a Treat


A Wrapped Refrain of what it my be.

  10 total reviews 
Comment by
Y. M. Roger
FantasyGirl
 
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  Rank:  20
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  Rank:  19
 
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Well, that is certainly one way to spell out the way it's gonna be, Jose! ;) I really enjoyed your employment of the wrapped refrain here, sir -- great movement and rhyme to carry the reader through that 'final warning' there!! ;) Thanx for sharing your challenge answer! ;) Yvette


 Comment Written 15-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 16-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Yvette. :) I guess that wraps it up or down.
Comment by
Sandra du Plessis
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  Rank:  28
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 Rank:  5
 

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A very well-written wrapped refrain. God loves us all. Just like a parent will but when we don't abide by His laws we will be punished onJudgment day or when we are found worthy be with Him forever in Heaven.


 Comment Written 15-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 16-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Sandra. :) It's a long road for many.
Comment by
2020 Recognized Writer of the Year
lyenochka
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Great job with the rhythm and rhythm of your three stanzas of wrapped refrain. And you give a sobering warning about the need to repent and receive God's salvation while there still is time.


 Comment Written 15-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 16-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Helen. :) I guess that wraps it up or down.
Comment by
Tina Crute
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The art is scary, as it should be. Hell is a real and scary place. I am so glad you wrote this because I have been thinking all day about Jesus coming back. It makes me evaluate my time here on earth, and you know what? There is no more valuable thing to do before He comes, than to tell others about Him.
Great writing from your heart! Be safe and well and have a good "rest of the week:)
Tina


 Comment Written 14-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 14-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Tina. I've been fighting with the devil for it wants me. I have prayed hard and done all I can. Tried to write a different kind of refrain, but the words wouldn't come. I wrote this and the words came. I've been thinking about Our Lord Jesus too.
Comment by
2019 Script Writer of the Year
Bill Schott
 
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This wrapped refrain, It Should Be a Treat, has the proper formatting and suggests that those who choose to be in the world may sacrifice eternal life.


 Comment Written 14-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 14-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Bill. I like your picture. :)
Comment by
Sugarray77
Melissa
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Hello Jose. You have penned a really good verse and brought to light the ways of sin are death! I enjoyed this verse that testifies of the truth and calls the readers to walk with God! Well done, my friend.

Melissa


 Comment Written 14-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 14-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Melissa. I try to make people smile, but not with this. :)
Comment by
Elizabeth Emerald
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I realize this is a somber poem--nevertheless I find don't bother fixing your hair a delightfully whimsical image. I also like time coos like a dove and wily ride--sly, slick. Cheers. LIZ


 Comment Written 14-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 14-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Liz. Sometimes I don't know what I pen.
Comment by
Iza Deleanu
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Resurrection and the pepetummobile the thin balance between right and wrong. But He is there to save us. Thank you for sharing and good luck with your writings.


 Comment Written 13-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 14-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Iza. :) Let's pray so.
Comment by
Susan X Smith
MS, MBA
Retired from Gov't
 
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I found this poem quite interesting, although I do not necessarily identify with the speaker. However, the rhymes worked well and the imagery was effective. Thanks for sharing.


 Comment Written 13-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 14-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Susan. :) I don't know what will happen, but it's nice to be prepared.
Comment by
Michael Ludwinder
 
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  Rank:  20
 
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I think this is a creative and interesting poem. I really liked the last line where you talk about not bothering to fix your hair. I like how you bring this down a different level I wasn't expecting with the final stanza. That stanza was a little freaky because it was so unexpected. But very creative.


 Comment Written 13-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 14-Oct-2020
    Thank you, Michael. I thought about changing it, but that's what came out. Besides it's Treat of Trick time. :)
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