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Reviews from
'Dear' Crossing


Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Hot Seat"

An investigation into a grisly death in Widmer, MN

  23 total reviews 
Comment by
Lady Waukesha
 
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i can picture the whole scene like I'm watching it on the big screen. You have a gift for dialogue...good work!

Moving on...


 Comment Written 29-Mar-2008



reply by the author on 29-Mar-2008
    Maybe I have a good grasp of dialogue 'cuz I talk a lot!

    Thank you! Thank you!

    Marjorie
Comment by
IndianaIrish
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"Hot Seat" is a good chapter, M The interrogation is handled very well and sure makes the reader wonder about Paul.

Smiles,
Indy :>)


 Comment Written 21-Nov-2007



reply by the author on 21-Nov-2007
    Paul's definitely a prime suspect!

    Thanks, Indy!
Comment by
sarahhitch
 
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I thought this chapter was well written and moved along very nicely, you did a great job.

I found no need to make any changes at all.

Thanks for sharing.

Sarah.


 Comment Written 07-Nov-2007



reply by the author on 07-Nov-2007
    Thanks again, Sarah. It means a lot to me that you're enjoying the book's progress.

    Marjorie

reply by sarahhitch on 07-Nov-2007
    I really am enjoying this book.

    Sarah
Comment by
bookishfabler
 
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I didn't find any nits or spags this time. I like your style of writing, but by now, you already know that, don't you? This book is new to me. I've read so many of your stories, but the novel is great.
hugs
book


 Comment Written 02-Nov-2007



reply by the author on 02-Nov-2007
    This is the one being represented by an agent, but it's obvious it needs this revising because it hasn't been placed yet, and it's been a long time. The Lock and Key workshop is a godsend!

    Thanks, Book!

    Marjorie
Comment by
hyway94
 
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Sounds to me that you may have this in hand. Don't forget you cnnot let on who you think done it. What I mean is you know who done it , but we don't.


 Comment Written 02-Nov-2007



reply by the author on 02-Nov-2007
    Don't worry, John, the secret's safe with me.

    Thanks again.
Comment by
davidray
 
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I think thi sis your best section yet. I shall see how you ended this chapter. Real good job, Marjorie. Wonderful dialogue. A couple things:

-Was it a traffic accident? I wasn't told anything.? Woody didn?t respond immediately. Davis shouted frantically. ?What? What was it??
-It was the toughest question to answer. Woody took a deep breath and explained as delicately as he could. (I think that little bit of David in there should be another paragraph. Maybe not, but I think so.)

?Her arm was severed, Mr. Davis ... below the elbow.? (I think this sentence should be pushed up with the rest of Woody's dialogue)

-Davis said the words almost as though he were testing the feel of them on his tongue. (excellent description!)
Well done. Looking forward to more. :)



 Comment Written 01-Nov-2007



reply by the author on 01-Nov-2007
    Morning, David.

    Thanks for your review and the suggestions. I've done the revisions now.

    Again, thanks!

    Marjorie

reply by davidray on 01-Nov-2007
    Good morning,Marjorie.I gather you knew when I typed 'David' i meant 'Davis.' New fingers this morning .....

reply by the author on 01-Nov-2007
    Yes, I knew. My fingers don't always cooperate either.
Comment by
Pit Bull Mom
 
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As I said in L&K, I have little to offer on this finely written chapter. It does appear that you tightened up a few of the sentences (if memory serves) and all the better! It came great, and very "pin to the seat" and leave the reader wondering what happens next. I'm off to the next L&K!

Hugs,

Heather


 Comment Written 31-Oct-2007



reply by the author on 31-Oct-2007
    Great! Thanks again.

    Marjorie
Comment by
garnbev
 
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This is a wonderful chapter, it's full of emotions and descriptive details. The dialogue is great. Good detective work. Thanks for sharing this.


 Comment Written 31-Oct-2007



reply by the author on 31-Oct-2007
    I'm honored to have you following the story, Garnbev. If I can hold your interest, I must be doing something right.

    Thanks for reading, reviewing and also for your encouragement and support.

    Marjorie
Comment by
ransomme
 
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Adrenaline flowing in anticipation of the next chapter. Thanks for a wonderful read thus far. This is a "can't put down until finished" book. Great job Marjorie. I admire your talent. God bless.


 Comment Written 30-Oct-2007



reply by the author on 30-Oct-2007
    Your support and encouragement are phenomenal, Ransomme. Thanks a million, my friend!

    Marjorie
Comment by
medisec
 
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This chapter was fresh, cleanly written with nary a comma out of the place! The intrigue is there; the dialogue superb--believable and just adds to the angst that you have already set up in previous chapters. Well done, Marjorie. I'm in for the long haul on this great mystery!

Rae


 Comment Written 30-Oct-2007



reply by the author on 30-Oct-2007
    I hope I can keep you as hooked all the way through, Rae. There's a lot of intrigue still ahead. Count on it! LOL

    Thanks, girl!

    Marjorie
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