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'Dear' Crossing

Viewing comments for Chapter 29 "Found and Lost"

An investigation into a grisly death in Widmer, MN

23 total reviews

Comment by

Lady Waukesha

Review Stars

Excellent

Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Well, I can't say I'm surprised. Nick really did this to himself the poor dumb bastard.

Very realistic dialogue in this exchange. You do a good job interjecting little bits of action here and there--like the whole deal with him taking out his wallet--that way it's not just talking heads back and forth.

good skills, my girlfriend.

That's all for tonight. More tomorrow...

:-D

Comment Written 06-Apr-2008

reply by the author on 07-Apr-2008

Thanks so much, Tracy.

It's 4:18.a.m. and I've got to TRY to catch a few more winks of sleep before 5:30.

Later!

Marjorie

Comment by

jc123

Excellent

The story is excellent. There are more twists and turns, that keep the story interesting. It will be interesting to see who killed Valerie. Will read the rest tomorrow

Comment Written 25-Jan-2008

reply by the author on 26-Jan-2008

It's exciting to know you're playing "catch up" on the story, jc123! I'm thrilled. Thank you!

Marjorie

Comment by

catydid52

Review Stars

Excellent

A great chapter, well written, and easy as always to understand.
Did you research police procedures? It is so well written, it's incredible.

Can't wait to see what Nick and his lawyer come up with next!

Comment Written 02-Dec-2007

reply by the author on 02-Dec-2007

When I was writing this, I did use a book for writers on Police Procedures. It was helpful, but I also got a little help from a friend who is a retired detective. He used to work in Minneapolis.

I'm so glad you're enjoying it, Catydid!

Thanks!

Marjorie

Comment by

TomandOma

Review Stars

Excellent

I loved it! Your interrogation scene was tense, tough and seemed realistic, according to other book and TV interrogation scenes I've read and seen.

This comes across as at least one of the most powerful chapters so far, and I'm happy to see the next chapter is waiting. Way to go!

All the best, Doris

Sorry I'm so slow with this, but my flirtation with haiku, answering reviews and celebrating Thanksgiving were all I could manage.

Comment Written 24-Nov-2007

reply by the author on 24-Nov-2007

Believe me, I understand, Doris. You're doing great!

Thanks. I hope your Thanksgiving was wonderful. (We've had to delay ours until a week from tomorrow or I'd be behind too! LOL)

Marjorie

Comment by

davidray

Review Stars

Excellent

A solid and exciting piece,Marjorie. The dialogue was very realistic ... good interrogation in the room with the lawywr present. Descriptions were well done. No probs here! :)

Comment Written 23-Nov-2007

reply by the author on 23-Nov-2007

Yay! Thanks very much, David!

Marjorie

Comment by

ransomme

Review Stars

Excellent

Things are heating up and I still have no clue as to whom the murderer is. You are really doing a good job at keeping the reader in the dark and holding their attention. Keep up the great work. God bless.

Comment Written 23-Nov-2007

reply by the author on 23-Nov-2007

Thanks very much, Ransomme. I'll try!

Marjorie

Comment by

sarahhitch

Review Stars

Excellent

Hi there Marjorie what a chapter. So Nick forgot to rid himself of his boots. Even though we know he didn't do it, but he was there. How will he get out of this I wonder?

I will have to read on.

Sarah,

Comment Written 22-Nov-2007

reply by the author on 22-Nov-2007

Time will tell!

Happy Thanksgiving, Sarah!

Marjorie

reply by sarahhitch on 22-Nov-2007

Thanks and to you. Have a good evening.

Sarah.

Comment by

RenieReader

Review Stars

Excellent

This is an action-packed chapter, Marjorie, and I love it. Nick's on the hot seat. That's going to be a tough one to wiggle out of. I think it's finally sunk in who fingered Nick on the phone. Poor sap. The tiger lady has turned on him. Great work, my friend.

I don't know, I just don't like this drawn out sixteen. How do you draw out the x sound? I think you can put some pregnant pauses in there to portray the same feel:
Sixxxteeeen ...." Ray drew a finger slowly across the file. "At sixteen you were in trouble for--"
[Let's see here. Ah, yes. Sixteen ... " Ray drew a finger slowly across the file. "It seems that at sixteen, you were in trouble for--"]

Renie

Comment Written 21-Nov-2007

reply by the author on 21-Nov-2007

I hadn't thought of it, Renie. Nope, you can't draw out an x! I don't know why, but I still kind of like it. Would it work for you if I were to draw it out as -- Sixteeeeeen..." Ray drew a finger... or do you just dislike that method completely?

Thanks for pointing out the obvious to the oblivious! LOL

Marjorie

reply by RenieReader on 21-Nov-2007

That would work for me. I just kept thinking about trying to draw out the 'x' sound and going, "How on earth do you do that?" LOL.

Comment by

IndianaIrish

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Review Stars

Rank: 432

Excellent

Great chapter, Marjorie! I loved reading all the chapters boom boom boom...now I have to wait with everyone else until you post the next one! LOL

Smiles,
Indy :>)

Comment Written 21-Nov-2007

reply by the author on 21-Nov-2007

I'm really happy you were able to catch up. Thanks for your wonderful support and encouragement, Indy! You're a gem!

Marjorie

Comment by

bookishfabler

Review Stars

Excellent

Not sure I like this new rating thing. I liked it better the old way. Anyway, that's neither here or there, As always, I love your book. The interrogation seemed realistic, at least what I know from television.

They cart wheeled across the table and came to a halt in front of Ray.
(cartwheel is one word)
Hugs
book

Comment Written 21-Nov-2007

reply by the author on 21-Nov-2007

Mornin', Book!

My spell checker didn't accept it as a single word, but it showed up differently elsewhere. I've changed it. I thought that was right in the first place. Aargh!

Thank you!

Marjorie

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