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Reviews from
Mystery


What went wrong?

  7 total reviews 
Comment by
Lyrical_CD
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
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This poem didn't touch my heart...it touched my soul. I have lived your words and the pain that came with it. I still haven't talked to him either. I was the best man in his wedding. Good write.
Cory


 Comment Written 02-Aug-2009



reply by the author on 02-Aug-2009
    Thank you so much for your extremely kind words and review. I really appreciate it. I hope one day both of our friends come around and decide to open up the lines of communication. In my case I doubt it (it's been about 7 years) but I still hope things between us change. Lisa
Comment by
Amfunny
 
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Oh, that is so sad. NOw I am curious also. It is a strange thing when something like that happens. The end of a beautiful friendship and not even knowing why. Great job.


 Comment Written 31-Jul-2009



reply by the author on 01-Aug-2009
    Thank you so much for taking the time to review my poem. I really appreciate your kind words. I agree that it is strange when something like that happens. It happened about 7 years ago and I am no closer to knowing why. Thanks again for your kind review!
Comment by
Sarah_Goldwell
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  576
 
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This is an excellent poem deeply meaningful and written from the heart. The rhyme and flow are well balanced and there is no improvement needed. It must be awful not knowing why. If you ever find out, please let us know x


 Comment Written 31-Jul-2009



reply by the author on 01-Aug-2009
    Thank you so much for your extremely kind review. It was so nice of you to take the time to review my poem. If I ever find out why my friend stopped being my friend I'll let you know. Unfortunately it happened about 7 years ago and I'll probably never find out what went wrong.
Comment by
Joyce L.
 
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I enjoyed your theme and the words were good. I would suggest that you change the ryhming words in the 5th stanza. there/tear doesn't match the rhyme.

I racked my brain,
no answer was there.
What had I done,
this doesn't seem fair.

Just a suggestion. Joyce


 Comment Written 31-Jul-2009



reply by the author on 31-Jul-2009
    Thsnk you for your kind review and for your good suggestion. I appreciate it. Lisa
Comment by
cwebb
 
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  138
 
Excellent
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Really good poem with good art to create a theme. The poem has a logical progression and I found myself moving along with the poem and then boom! the whole thing changes. Wow, just like some stories in my life that feel very unresolved. Good job and good luck!


 Comment Written 31-Jul-2009



reply by the author on 31-Jul-2009
    Thank you so much for taking the time to review my poem, and for your kind words and review stars. I really appreciate it! Lisa
Comment by
Nanette Mary
 
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Hullo Jomo ....

This is very well written and tells a story which combines joy and sadness. There is just one small change to suggest, for the sake of the rhythm in your last line ...

* You have - why our friendship did die ... I suggest -
why our friendship should die ....

Thank you for sharing this with us. As it is a Contest entry, I wish you well.
With love from .... Nanette Mary.


 Comment Written 26-Jul-2009



reply by the author on 26-Jul-2009
    Thank you so much for your kind review and for your excellent suggestion. I changed the word did to should. I think it does improve the rhythm. I appreciate your kind words and your advice. Fondly, Lisa
Comment by
barbara.wilkey
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
 
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  Rank:  6
Review Stars
  
 Rank:  36
 
barbara.wilkey Recommends:
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10 member cents

 

#6 Ranked Novelist
Excellent
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It is so hard losing a close friend and not knowing why. I'm going through that right now. After numerous years, of speaking to her daily. You did a wonderful job decribing the feelings.


 Comment Written 26-Jul-2009



reply by the author on 26-Jul-2009
    Thank you so much for your kind review. I really appreciate it. I hope you are able to patch things up with your friend. Mine refused to take my calls and I finally had to give up. Again, I appreciate your kind words. Lisa
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