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Viewing comments for Chapter 15 "Back in the Saddle"

A woman is stalked by a fan

  13 total reviews 
Comment by
RenieReader
 
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Here we go with a nice, soothing 'getting to know you' chapter that makes my heart go pitty pat. Good job, my friend.

[Com'mon==>C'mon], girls, let[']s go outside."

Hugs and kudos,
Renie


 Comment Written 11-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 11-Jan-2010
    Hi Renie,

    I swear, that's one of those I can never remember when I'm typing! Will adjust!

    Thanks for the great comments, hon,

    Gayle

reply by RenieReader on 12-Jan-2010
    You ain't alone, kiddo.
Comment by
joelh605
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Hey, it's MY flaw - go get your own!
 
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So, where did Bad Bart spend the night? And that's a nice touch, Rudy feeling relieved when Bart put his lights on.

Anita Crawford - the final book will get a footnote directing the reader to a past number in the series?

Joel
=-=-=
On one side, her old jodphers

Tsk! jodhpurs

The paddock boots waited on the floor next to the night stand, and after dressing,

second comma is excess to needs and should be put back into the bit bucket


 Comment Written 09-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 09-Jan-2010
    Good grief! That's amazing, how one can be so wrong for so many years? Yep, jodhpurs. I'm sayin'!

    Great about the wxtra comma, it's so outta there!

    Y'know, I don't think Anita rates a footnote. She'll get out from time to time, or not. I think my plate is full! I mean, everyone over the age of twenty has at least one ex, right?

    Thanks so much and hugs!

    Gayle
Comment by
jayesnb
 
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He waited until the Mustang crested the rise, waiting for the traffic light to change.... this sentence sounded a little awkward to me...maybe it was the 2 uses of the word "wait" so close together...


He took her along the trails and byways that circled the farm, riding them from memory, describing a favorite citrus grove or the green rolling hills at sunset, a light, babbling brook running through. .. this long sentence slowed me down... I had to read it a few times.. its probably just me, but it didnt sound right..

I liked the way you let Cathy have her rant... She has been so composed in the previous chapters and it was good to see that side come out of her....

This was another wonderful read...Your words flowed smoothly allowing me to get lost in the scenes...





 Comment Written 09-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 09-Jan-2010
    Hi Jaye,

    I'll look into that sentence. It might read better as two. Thanks for spotting that.

    Poor Cathy, can you imagine what her life must be like. Myself, I'd be bald at the very least!

    Thanks again<~>
    Gayle
Comment by
Readywriter52
 
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It must be hard to wake up with two large dogs in bed with you. I think eventfully Cathy will have to give up Kip. I don't think she can handle two dogs. Rudy is feeling some attraction to Cathy.


 Comment Written 09-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 09-Jan-2010
    Hi Ready,

    So nice to see you again and thanks for the great review and comments,

    Gayle
Comment by
rwilliam
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Good chapter Gayle. I like the progression of this very much!

One suggestion though, you mentioned that Rudy noticed the white BMW following them and then nothing else is ever mentioned. I personally kept waiting for Rudy to keep looking in the rear view mirror or internal dialogue of making mental notes of the BMW. Just a thought.

I also think the internal dialogue of Rudy at the end is a lot. I remember you mentioning that he liked living alone with the dogs in an earlier chapter so you may or may not need to keep that. Personal note.telling me that he is singing on for the ride isn't necessary either because I can see that from his smiling and sticking with Cathy, inviting her to the farm , etc.

Great work I am enjoying this so much. Off to read the next chapter. Thanks for sharing.


 Comment Written 09-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 09-Jan-2010
    Well, see, he notices the BMW just enough to remember it if and when he needs to! Let me check into that dialogue, maybe tighten it up.

    Thanks so much for the encouraging comments and great review!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment by
barbara.wilkey
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Another good chapter. I like the budding romance.

they'd be upon her, nudging her arms, licking her face, whining to go out. (I had to laugh. I have a great pyrennees and a black lab, I think that explains my laugh.)



 Comment Written 08-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 09-Jan-2010
    Holy Cow a Great Pyrennees? I love them. I used to own a close cousin, a Newfoundland, and I'm sayin', aren't they the most fun dogs ever? Mine was named Bear, reasons obvious, and he used to like to chase my horses. He lost a couple of teeth here and there but never complained. I guess he thought it was a fair trade!

    Thanks for the great review!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment by
c_lucas
 
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This is a good set-up chapter fleshing out Cathy's and Rudy's character. You have changed the scenario and Rudy is playing on the home turf. Good job.


 Comment Written 08-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 09-Jan-2010
    Hold onto your seat, Charlie, we're taking off!

    Glad you liked this one and thanks for the great review.

    Gayle

reply by c_lucas on 09-Jan-2010
    You're welcome, Gayle. Charlie
Comment by
Sasha
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Sasha
 
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The depth of the characters is building very nicely. I find myself becoming emotionally involved with them. You description of Rudy's feelings for Cathy is excellent and exceptionally well written. You take the reader inside his head and heart. Not knowing where Norman is, is unnerving to say the least. Very nice work with this one.


 Comment Written 08-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 09-Jan-2010
    Hey Sasha,

    Rudy is one of my fave characters and it's great letting him out to play. He's been on the sidelines too long.

    Thanks for the wonderful comments, my friend,

    Gayle
Comment by
Korton
 
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Another excellent chapter, Gayle. However, we don't yet know if Norman was able to follow them or if he lost them in traffic, either in town or on the freeway. It'll be interesting to find out. Very well done.


 Comment Written 08-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 09-Jan-2010
    Hey Frank,

    Poor Norman. He's just not having a good day, is he? It's only ging to get worse! LOL!

    Thanks for the great review, my friend,

    Gayle
Comment by
Dave M
 
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Gayle,

This is an excellent chapter. You give a bit of backstory for Rudy, just enough and not too much. Also, puppy breath is certainly an acquired taste.

I found no nits but have one suggestion:

"How tall is he? Danny was huge, 16.3." I assume the "16.3" is in hands or something such, because no horse is sixteen feet tall. You might explain this a bit better for readers who aren't that familiar with horses.

Dave


 Comment Written 08-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 09-Jan-2010
    You're right, Dave. Either I'll just say hands, or maybe go even farther in the notes and say what a 'hand' is. Great idea.

    Hey, thanks for the great review and I'll be up in your neck of the woods in about an hour!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
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