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Viewing comments for Chapter 33 "Breakthrough, Pt. 2"

A woman is stalked by a fan

  13 total reviews 
Comment by
jayesnb
 
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So now they are talking to the gatekeeper of Nathan... I wonder how hats going to work out..Somethin tells me Norman not done yet though...well written chapter and informative...no errors...great job


 Comment Written 01-Feb-2010



reply by the author on 03-Feb-2010
    Hi Jaye

    Thanks so much for the fine comments, and your input. Sorry it took so long for me to reply. Been busy as a one-armed paper hanger!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment by
joelh605
Level 2 Pro
I'm dogmatically certain about much.
Hey, it's MY flaw - go get your own!
 
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Nice job showing the conflict on the other end - we need to be in suspense about Nathan for the rest of this to work. :)

Joel
=-=-=
With great enthusiasm, Nathan ran his knuckles across the top of Donnie's scalp like a child of five. "Nuggie, nuggie!"

Regarding prior chapter review, remarking "over the top" - gotta say it again. :) - - unless you want the reader to look down on Nathan as some sort of helpless loser / schlemiel


 Comment Written 31-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 01-Feb-2010
    Yikes! Joel, that's not what I want him to be. In many ways, he's very child-like. He's never had a friend, ever, and finding Donnie and spending so much time with him he's acting very immature. Okay, I will get that out of there. Nathan is a sad character, mostly, and that's the way I want to portray him.

    Thanks for that, my friend, I'll adjust the ms!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment by
barbara.wilkey
Premier Author
 
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  Rank:  5
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 Rank:  56
 

#5 Ranked Novelist
Excellent
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I wonder if they can prove DID? How many different personalities does Nathan have?

I guess everyone has a little part of a Norman in them, don't you think?" (Interesting statement)


 Comment Written 31-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 31-Jan-2010
    LOL! Liked that one, huh? I think there's a bit of the Norman character in all of us. I sure appreciate the fine comments and rating!

    Gayle
Comment by
fictionwriter
 
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Another great addition to the story. Okay, now I'm totally into finding out about this multiple personality thing. I would love it if you explained what the gatekeeper does. I'm not familiar with the ins and outs, and I think the reader would like to know a bit about him. Well done.


 Comment Written 31-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 31-Jan-2010
    The gatekeeper is the one charged with keeping Nathan safe. Do you remember the gatekeeper getting all over Norman for putting Nathan in danger. It was early in the book so I'm not sure you read it. Each of the alters have a specific function that we will see a little more of as the story expands. DID is a fascinating disorder and one I've done a ton of research on. Thanks for the fine R&R!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment by
c_lucas
 
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We are still in pioneer land when it comes to the human mind. This is very well written with very good imagery and descriptive scheme.


 Comment Written 31-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 31-Jan-2010
    Thanks Charlie, I'm having a ball doing all the research but it's so much fun I get lost for hours.

    Hugs,
    Gayle

reply by c_lucas on 31-Jan-2010
    You're welcome, Gayle. Charlie
Comment by
shelley kaye
taking each day
a night at a time
 
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yea some people just don't believe in DID or any other mental illness forthat matter .... the brain is so fascinating! :)

anyway great chapter! didn't see one spaggie or typos either!

thanx for sharing!

shelley :)


 Comment Written 31-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 31-Jan-2010
    Hey my little Cali Gurl,

    Thanks for the great comments. I know, DID in particular is a hard one for some folks to wrap their minds around. I have no trouble, lol!

    thanks again!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment by
patmedium
 
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I find, AT LAST, some interest in this man...
I wonder whether it's the introduction of the gatekeeper?
I feel comfortable with sanity and calm! My reactions are interesting me here. I've got a wide smile on my face as I write this.


 Comment Written 31-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 31-Jan-2010
    Well, I love wide smiles and grins. I'm glad you can see something to like in Nathan. You will in the end, I promise.

    Thanks for the fine review, my friend!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment by
Readywriter52
 
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Nathan is in therapy and they got in contact with Peter, the gatekeeper. Maybe they can control Norman through him. If they can't, Nathan can never be trusted.


 Comment Written 31-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 31-Jan-2010
    I think you nailed it again, Ready! Very good summary of what's going down! I so appreciate your reviews!

    Gayle
Comment by
Dave M
 
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Gayle,

So who is Celine? I thoroughly enjoyed this read, and I'm really glad Dr. Pritchard and Donnie got in touch with the gatekeeper. And Sandy's doubts are understandable, but not appropriate here.

I found one line I really like:

"You know that and I know that, but the police don't." Excellent line! This says it all. I couldn't find anything to criticize.

Dave


 Comment Written 31-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 31-Jan-2010
    LOL, Dave,

    When Lenny and the gang went ahead and caught Norman without help of the constabulary, Sandy was very mad at Lenny. He plied her with roses and Celine Dion concert tickets! Clever boy, all is well now!

    thanks for the great review!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
Comment by
RenieReader
 
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Now that was super fast--almost too fast to be believable. After all the years Nathan has been protected by his alters, I just don't know about these fast revelations. I guess it could be so, but it makes me nervous, dear one.

I forgot about this nit:
You[']re about to begin a cool journey, dude[,==>. I]t's a good thing.

I see you're still fighting EE. Sheez.

Hugs,
Renie


 Comment Written 30-Jan-2010



reply by the author on 31-Jan-2010
    Yes, Eddie is on the rampage again. I don't know why he's doing that. I didn't make any changes.

    Okay, the rapidity of the changes comes from Donnie, really. Just imagine if you grew up without ever having a friend, even one. And then this guy comes up to you, all smiles, obviously wanting to be your friend. It's answered prayer as far as Nathan is concerned. Plus, six weeks so far of living in Donnie's pocket have softened his resistance. Plus, you have to remember, the gatekeeper is the boss. He's the one charged with keeping Nathan safe. He realizes that with the possibility of prison ahead, something has to give and quick.

    Thanks for the great review! Hope you're feeling better!

    Hugs,
    Gayle
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