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Reviews from
Evil in Paradise


Part One

  44 total reviews 
Comment by
hotstuff
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
"That'd be Paradise Lodge." He (His)smile broadened.

Great opening chapter to your story. Full of suspense.
The park ranger gives me the creeps. I am guessing he isn't what he seems?


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol

reply by hotstuff on 21-May-2010
    Gosh, hope you recover soon. It just goes to show how dangerous some plants can be.
Comment by
buckeyewriter
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Oooh! Creepy beginning! I don't trust anybody so far! Thought you did a fabulous job of creating Carrie's backstory with James without using a cliched flashback. And great first line! Really interesting start.
Amanda


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol
Comment by
Mischief's Momma
 
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She'd wept - just 'she wept' would work better

she'd loaded - same deal, 'she loaded' would be fine :)

Great start and finish too, well done!

I started thinking, hey that scenery sounds like it could be around here (I live north of Atlanta and have driven to the mountains a lot) and turns out I was right :)

A really fun story, full of potential malevolence :)
MM


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol
Comment by
Sasha
Level 1 Pro
Premier Author
Sasha
 
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  Rank:  31
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 Rank:  304
 
Excellent
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As much as I love cliffhangers I must admit I also hate them. I can't stand the idea of having to wait to find out what happens. So far you have done a great job building my interest and dislike and mistrust of Carrie's boyfriend, and of course there is the ranger....


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol

reply by Sasha on 21-May-2010
    Good heavens! We could start a competition on who's life sucks the most...at this point I think you are ahead 1 - 0 with the poison ivy.
Comment by
Thesis
Premier Author
 
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  Rank:  554
 
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Great start to this multi-part story, Carol. It sounds like her husband, James has something going on that's not on the up and up.

Ranger Rick, on the other hand, just seems like a sleeze ball - a dangerous one. I'm enjoying the story, waiting for Part 2. - John


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol

reply by Thesis on 21-May-2010
    That's nasty stuff, Carol. I found a medicated cream called "IVAREST" that has an antihistamine and an analgesic that works great on poison ivy. We have a lot of it around our place since we live right next to a tract of woods. Hope you get some relief soon. - John
Comment by
misscookie
misscookie
 
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Excellent
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This is a very nice movinf story . I love the way the syory move feom ode siuration to another, I was feeling sorry for the blobde but you turn hresisness into well, lets just say wonders will never aceat.
this is a good write. Itruly enjoyed the story.


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol

reply by misscookie on 21-May-2010
    I can't believe allthis happen to you at onceI'm tuly sorry and wish you speedy recovery.
    Now thats will be some story to write about. that it weasy not strained youreyes trying to write or answer review they will be there.
Comment by
missy98writer
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Carol,
Your story is well written as always. Carrie should be leery of James because he's was very snippy to her. I anticipate danger ahead for Carrie. The Ranger acted bizarre. The last two lines were ominous :
The Park Ranger shaded his eyes and watched the red convertible disappear around the mountainside. He smiled.

Welcome to paradise.

I look forward to more of this story - I'm assuming it will be a continuation like your last awesome story about the homeless murders. Outstanding writing and great dialogue. Carrie's fiance had a golf outing planned and could go with her. I wonder if there is another woman. Keep up the impressive writing my friend. . .Melissa!


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol
Comment by
vandawalker
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
You already know that I love your descriptive writing. I could see the Blue Ridge Mountains and smell the air there. The characters are especially interesting and developing well. The ending definitely appeals to my curiosity to check back in on this story. This sounds like a thriller. Good writing.

I probably missed the clue, but I can't find where she tells her fiance about the other friends' husbands/boyfriends coming to the Lodge, but James talks about it. Maybe check that.

Check this:
older than her(she), was


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol
Comment by
Shirley B
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Oh what a creepy ranger! I already mistrust him and know he is going to kill someone. I also just know the boyfriend is not to be trusted. Great story. I hope you are continuing this. I want to know what is going to happen. Great job, Shirley


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol
Comment by
eliz100
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This was a great read from beginning to end. You threw me off with the disagreement with her fiancee, the ending had nothing to do with him.


 Comment Written 19-May-2010



reply by the author on 21-May-2010
    Please forgive me for this cut and paste response. I've been having a bit of a thriller myself - been clearing trees, shrubs and weeds and a ringer called poison ivy jumped into the match. I lost and my eyes now resemble a prize fighter--swollen to the max. I can squint today so I wanted to let you know I appreciate your reading and will try to continue the story tomorrow or Sunday. Thank you for your continued support and understanding...Smiles, Carol
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