"They stop pursuits with hearts austere They know their state to be severe Faces showing muted fear They know their end is near" - I just love this stanza as it is so completely captivating. This is an exceptional poem and most worthy of all the honors bestowed upon it. Thank you so much for sharing this with me.
The cadence in this poem is excellent to say the least. The message has good thoughts to think about and it is written in a very good poetic verve. I enjoyed reading this excellent piece of poetic art... john
An excellent poem for such an early work. You obviously have a natural talent for poetry. Strong and powerful well penned words creating excellent imagery and provoking a wealth of thought.
I like your references to the Masters and one of my favorite poems by Robert Frost. Fairly cynical for one so young, yet shows you choose to think and seek rather than drudge the path of "conformity" and the "sloth" of acceptance without query which makes change and true progress so slow. Great mono-rhyme, well thought out phrases and some unique and creative thinking.
Certainly a poem which questions, stimulates thought and discussion. I particularly like your first stanza ..... my favorite. It would be nice if everyone had such insight.
Great flow and some clever poetic techniques with alliteration, consonance and assonance. You may be a beginner .... you do know your stuff. lol
Welcome to FS ... I look forward to more of your work. Warm Regards - Lovinia
Comment Written 15-Dec-2012
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2012
Thank you for your review of my work. I really appreciate the insight you gave to the piece. Happy holidays!
reply by Lovinia on 17-Dec-2012
My pleasure! I look forward to reading more of your work. Thanks for the holiday wishes and have a great time yourself. Merry Christmas. Hugs - :) Lovinia xoxo
For an early poem, it shows a remarkable mastery of rhyme - though perhaps the meter is a little shaky in places. For me, the use of quaint old English ("'tis", &c.) is a distraction. But overall, very impressive.
I will be honest and say I did not fully get this poem. I did not understand what or where you were going with it? Having said this, I do think the first line and the last line finally brought it all together, just did not understand the middle.
Comment Written 23-Nov-2012
reply by the author on 23-Nov-2012
This poem relies heavily on the reader being familiar with the works of Robert Frost and his piece "The Road Less Taken" which is referenced in the second quatrain for the first time, and is brought up throughout the poem.