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Reviews from
The Muse You Never Lose


Pain

  48 total reviews 
Comment by
Norbanus
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
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Each day I try to find a way to follow in your step
Without the inspiration that is needed for the prep
I've heard of fractious ranting as a means to prime the pump
But my slow mind is not the kind to bubble or to jump

Thanks for the inspiration, friend a peek at where to go
There's more than just a sonnet here that you know how to show.


 Comment Written 16-Feb-2014



reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
    I'll be laughing at this reply for awhile, my friend, and I thank you for it. Glad I can inspire in any way, Fred. I appreciate it.
Comment by
Kenneth Schaal
 
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Excellent
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I read this several times, my friend, and am still in a quandary (certainly nothing technical) as to its direction. I believe the author would have me think he's a wiser man--but the neon's flashing, 'Jaded.' I sense a personal loss here and by no means am I making light of it. A sad report, beautifully executed, but not bitter. I couldn't chose just one verse that exceled for me; they all fit like they were born to be together. Kenny


 Comment Written 16-Feb-2014



reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
    Thanks so much, Kenny. Yes, jaded would be a word for it, and you could almost say that he enjoys the pain when he's writing about it. As always, I appreciate your insight, my friend.

reply by Kenneth Schaal on 16-Feb-2014
    Poets are hard-luck made.

reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
    Hard-scrabble for sure, brother.
Comment by
2009-2014 Poet Of The Year
adewpearl
Premier Author
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Excellent
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solid rhyming couplets
I also like the internal rhyming with pairings like enchanting/ranting and enlightened/frightened
clever pairing of winter/sent her
good alliteration and imagery in symbolic sleet
good alliteration in coldly coincided
good pairing of is his and he is
insightful look at human nature in good poetic form
Brooke


 Comment Written 16-Feb-2014



reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
    Thanks so much, Brooke. I appreciate the review.
Comment by
Sam Mendonca
 
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Excellent
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I would certainly give this poem the rating of six, only I don't have any left.

The deep emotional wording of this poem keeps the reader's attention througout the poem.



 Comment Written 16-Feb-2014



reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
    Thank you very much, Sam. I appreciate the great review, and the virtual sixer.
Comment by
STEPHEN A CARTER
 
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Excellent
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LOVE these lines:
"A wrong with his reaction (by a pen-and-paper binge).
"And left him unrequited, in that same familiar void.
"He's busy when he?s losing, and he's better when he is.
CONSIDER:
His Muse BECAME enchanting AS her inspiration glowed,
He sensed A flame inside her THAT SOON warmed HIS COLD winter,
Who won't forget he?s using HER rejection as his fuel

Loved the piece at 14 beat/line (very difficult to do as to the flow). Suggestions only, no disrespect intended.

Regards:




 Comment Written 16-Feb-2014



reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
    Thanks for your suggestions, Stephen, and your great review. I like two of them, but the other would destroy the meter.

reply by STEPHEN A CARTER on 16-Feb-2014
    Dear Marillion: Glad to be of assistance. Have been a poet for 45 years. Just posted 'The Ring', Cantos 1 and 2. 5 more to come. Do drop by. Thanks.

    With Respect: Steve C
Comment by
skye
 
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Oh muse, where art thou and when are you coming back. I love this. There is pain and gain to writing. Inspiration is hard to find sometimes. You captured so much of the highs and lows in this excellent poem, with great meter and imagery.
Very well done.


 Comment Written 16-Feb-2014



reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
    Thank you so much, skye, for your great review.
Comment by
c_lucas
 
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Excellent
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When a relationship ends, sweep it under the rug, forget about it and start anew. This is very well written with a smooth flow flow of words.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.


 Comment Written 16-Feb-2014



reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
    Thank you so much, Charlie, for your great review.

reply by c_lucas on 16-Feb-2014
    You're welcome. Charlie
Comment by
Robin Gilmor
 
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Excellent
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What an interesting verse about your use of the devastation of loss and the
pain suffered that's transformed into your Muse for writing. Well said, as always, an easy flow and enjoyable read. Smiles, Robin :)

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.


 Comment Written 16-Feb-2014



reply by the author on 16-Feb-2014
    Thanks so much, Robin. I appreciate it!
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