Alright Mikey, you got me intrigued with this one. I was gonna start on the third chapter just cuz it was the object of the notification I had in my inbox, but glad I decided to start at the beginning. I like the obscure prologue, it has a malevolent feel and promise's to introduce a clever and murderous villain. I'm interested to see who he was speaking to and the father he was alluding to. The quick peek at the crime scene and the detective was done right and gave us as readers a good sense that we were about to dig into a quality story. Great job Mikey.
I have mixed feelings about this one. I enjoyed the poem...very clever and the prose was, in my opinion, a bit shaky. It didn't completely capture my interest, but I do plan on reading chapter 1 to see where this may be leading.
I'm not sure I followed the poetry, but it was intriguing as a lead-in. I must move on to the first chapter to see what's coming, so I guess that speaks volumes about whether or not your prologue 'hooked' your reader...*grin*
Mikey, this is a creative introduction to a story. For me a list of characters always helps keeps things straight or a more detailed stage setting helps me. You could go places with this one. At first I thought it was a halibun. LOL :0 GracieAnn
I like the non sequitors in this poem. It was entertaining and interesting. The language is fun and descriptive. I see you have some onamotopeas in your poem which adds a Dr. Seuss flavor. I enjoyed reading this. Thanks for sharing.
This is intriguing, especially in form. I really like the way you start with a poem. The rhyme works well in a lyrical sense. I'm not sure about the street slang - I'm just not familiar with it. I like the idea of combining this with the beginning of a mystery story. I'll be interested to see where this goes.
Hmmm...Citizen Kane with the Bard as town cried/ wise jester. And you really caught the voice of his streets without it sounding forced. I think you have a winner here. I have always liked your poetry/prose combos. Keep it going.