That Wasn't What She Had In Mind
An unhappy toddler seeks a solution.
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Reviews from
Poems From a Silent Voice


Selected poems presented in rhyme and meter.

  36 total reviews 
Comment by
Sharon Haiste
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 12 -
September's Song
This is a beautiful poem. It paints a clear and lovely picture in the mind while following the structure as intended.
Well done.
And the picture is equally beautiful.
Sharon


 Comment Written 14-Nov-2017



reply by the author on 18-Nov-2017
    Thank you,Sharon! I appreciate your kind comments and five stars.
    All the best,
    Rodger
Comment by
Picture this
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 10 -
The Old Bicycle
Hello Warren. Thank you for painting such a touching scene that embraces the power of reminiscing. I am new to the site (joined today) and look forward to learning so much about the power of words, transformed into so many genres. I will particularly enjoy re-reading, and most of all very much appreciate your overview of the technique you have used, and in this case modified. My best. Diane


 Comment Written 27-Oct-2017



reply by the author on 28-Oct-2017
    Hello Diane, It's nice and have you as a fan! Thank you for all of your kind comments and compliments. I love writing poetry and when I receive a review like the two you wrote for me, it's uplifting and I appreciate it very much. I have to credit FS and the wonderful writers and instructors that once were here. Don't get me wrong, there are still some gifted writers here but not as many as before. I had three classes with Brooke Baldwin (adewpearl) and I credit her for making me a better poet. This poem is one of my personal favorites Thank for bookcasing it too.
    All the best,
    Rodger

































Comment by
Joan E.
 
Review Stars
  
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 1 -
Another Soldier Died Today
First, congratulations on another win with your nonet--you're on a roll--keep it going! Thank you for your tribute to the fallen in this set of rhymed quatrains. Your contrast between the speaker's point of view and the soldier's experience is very effective. Well done- Joan


 Comment Written 12-Jun-2017



reply by the author on 15-Jun-2017
    Thank you, Joan. I appreciate your kind congrats for winning the Nonet contest. Another Soldier is one of my favorites and I appreciate your wonderful review! I wrote it when my son was stationed in Iraq (US Air Force) and I realized how detached we in the U.S. are from the conflicts our children are sent to fight. Thanks again!
    All the best, Rodger

reply by Joan E. on 15-Jun-2017
    Thank you the additional context and your reminder to be more engaged. Sighs- Joan
Comment by
BeasPeas
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 10 -
The Old Bicycle
Hi Rodger. This is so charming. I bought a bike a year or so ago and have only ridden it once since then. It seems riding and balancing is harder now than I remember it to be back in my younger days. Your poem is so well written it took me right back there. Thank you for that. Marilyn


 Comment Written 11-Jun-2017



reply by the author on 11-Jun-2017
    Thank you, Marilyn. You've reviewed one the favorites of mine. I' m so happy it took you back to your younger years. life seemed so much simpler back then when friends would actually come over to your house and you would go to theirs.My niece told me that her six year old daughter has a play date with another little girl, a classmate of hers and they meet up on Skype!
    Technology is convenient but we're losing personal contact that can deepen relationships.

    PS - If you still want to read my Bluebird poems the best way to find them is to click on the spyglass in my portfolio which displays all my poems by book and by chapter in A-Z order. They are: Where Bluebirds Fly 7/14/13 Bluebird 10/11/11 and
    Cold Gray sky 2/10/13. Please don't feel like you have to review them but I'm not gonna stop you lol.
    all the best, Rodger

reply by BeasPeas on 11-Jun-2017
    Hi Rodger. I'll take a look. It will save me from searching. I'm still learning the finer points of the site. Thanks for the info. Marilyn
Comment by
GoodHearted Woman
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 10 -
The Old Bicycle
This poem has an 'old' feel that I can't quite get the words for.
It pulls something from my brain from another time and age, and maybe that's what others feel when they read it. I always read everything twice, just to make sure I 'get' what the poet is saying.
It brings up lovely sharp pictures and is very original in its idea.
Thanks for posting. GoodHearted Woman


 Comment Written 18-Mar-2017



reply by the author on 21-Mar-2017
    Hello goodhearted woman,

    Thank you your review Is wonderful and validates my writing! I was hoping the reader would get the same feeling You just mentioned. It's about an old man coming back to his boyhood home and for a moment reliving the memories he cherishes much. I'm happy you enjoyed this poem. It's one of my personal favorites
    All the best, Rodger
Comment by
vwilks
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Rating of Chapter 12 -
September's Song
Very nicely written. Your poem reads like a song without the music. Easy on the lips and on the brain. I am unable to think of anything to say to make it better. Very nicely done. Thank you for sharing.


 Comment Written 10-Dec-2016



reply by the author on 10-Dec-2016
    Hello vwilks!
    Thank you very much for your kind comments and six star rating! I'm glad you commented that it read like a song. I believe poetry should have a steady beat and read like music because that's what I strive to do when I write. I appreciate your review very much.
    All the best,
    Rodger
Comment by
I am Cat
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Rating of Chapter 6 -
Morning Mist
Good lord, Rodger!
I was reading through your newly 'sealed' poems and this just captured my heart and attention. I'm a fan of the swap quatrain, but I don't think I've ever seen it done such justice as this.
It captured my breath in throat.
wow.
Such emotive power and poetic technique all in one place... here, take my last six, and wear it well... this truly deserves it. Great job and wow, congrats on this very prestigious award.
Great job!
Cat


 Comment Written 06-Dec-2016



reply by the author on 06-Dec-2016
    <<< CAT! >>>
    What can I say about a review like you've written for me, my friend! I'm so glad you thought it worthy and I'm grateful for your wonderful comments! School shootings are one of those topics that just make me go out of my mind! How can any human being ever shoot and kill innocent, defenseless children.... I'll never understand. I love swap quatrains too, though it took all I had to squeeze some emotion out of this one. I remember it was a constant presence for a week of so before I got it where I thought it was a decent poem. I like taking a format that most people think should not be used for serious topics and trying to do just that.
    Thank you again!
    I appreciate your support!!
    hugssss
    Rodger

reply by I am Cat on 06-Dec-2016
    Beautifully done, you inspired me to write an ekphrastic one today. I haven't posted it yet. It was fun to write
Comment by
jlsavell
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  423
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Rating of Chapter 12 -
September's Song
Warren, as always you write incredibly beautiful. My heart will always go out to you. I work with breast cancer survivors everyday, their stories are inspirational and also, sadly, as yours, turns to great sorrow. I am so moved by this work, I do not have the words to convey my thoughts properly.. I am very honored and humbled to be nominated along side you. Your work is exceptional and I do hope it gets the recognition it deserves. Best wishes dear man... jimi


 Comment Written 04-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 05-Oct-2016
    Hi jimi,
    Thank you very much for your wonderful complimentary review! I'm sorry I haven't answered until now, I don't always wander into FS every day. It's been ten years now and though I have moved on in my personal life, September always reminds
    me of the event. I'm glad to read you are working with breast cancer survivors, and I commend you for doing so. They need all the support that is available. The ironic thing about my wife's treatment is that she was found to be allergic to the one drug (available ten years ago) that had the strongest chance of saving her life. I am honored to be chosen to compete for POM alongside you as well!! I think as a group, this group is one of the best I have ever read for this contest. Good luck to you in the voting.

    All the best,
    Rodger

reply by jlsavell on 05-Oct-2016
    Rodger, I understand about treatments, but you do not want to get me started on my rant. I have a different view of these poisons designed to save life, or so this is their propaganda. I feel so much for you. I know how much she is in you. I am happy that you have found some acceptance and are moving through it with immense grace and courage and strength.. jimi

reply by the author on 05-Oct-2016
    I know what you mean about many of the treatments for breast cancer and I would add it's horrible how some doctors dispense addicting painkillers like candy! With this being breast cancer awareness month I hope woman and their families are aware of alternative treatments!
    Thank you jimi!
    Rodger

reply by jlsavell on 05-Oct-2016
    we will talk.. I am a huge advocate of alternative and holistic treatments. I advocate functional medicine.. google.. I see too much Rodger, too much, But for liability issues I cannot say anything to my clients. I fit women with breast prosthesis, wigs, bras and compression therapy. I do see quite a bit. and for you.. I would like to suggest you look up Dr. Amen and his info on the brain and parkinsons. Please let me know..

reply by the author on 05-Oct-2016
    Thanks jimi, I'll do just that. Thank you, Rodger
Comment by
I am Cat
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Rating of Chapter 12 -
September's Song
Hello Dear Rodger...
you tugged and pulled my heartstrings from the very beginning... this:

When autumn breezes stir and groan
and bending branches scratch and sway,
without you here, I watch alone,
as drifting leaves perform ballet.

is just pure magic!

and then...

The air was crisp in dawn's array,
that Sunday morn our world went wrong.
ten years ago you slipped away,
when I still loved September's song.

wow. You make the heart stop here... with the pain we KNOW is coming. And since we know YOU, it is more real to us. At least it was to me.

your recurring line:

At times I stop to kneel and pray.
When I was weak, you made me strong;
your optimism lit my way
when I still loved September's song.

when I still loved September's Song... wow, is so poignant and effective here.

oh Rodger...

Sometimes I feel I must atone
for praises that I failed to say,
but now your name is etched in stone
and I'm a quiet castaway.
I wish I could just fly away
from sorrow that does not belong,
my thoughts thumb back to fonder days -
when I still loved September's song.

that was just the most heartbreaking, lovely verse. Wow. For me, you're one of the best, most compelling poets I've ever read. I just can't get enough of your words... and I know they come from a place of pain, perhaps that's what draws me to you... you DO write from pain, but you do it so beautifully, not macabre... just beauty.

My recollections fade and fray,
like poems left unread too long;
our time remains a sweet bouquet
when I still loved September's song.

(perfectly phrased (though you do use po-em as two syllables... lol )

but this is just sheer perfection. I loved it. I have to congratulate you on your nomination... and offer my condolences, yet again, as well... I'm so sorry that you've lost your wife, but so happy you can find the beautiful ways to write it all down.

A sixer for me... hell, a ten if I had it.
Love and laughter to you,
Cat


 Comment Written 03-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 03-Oct-2016
    >> Hello Cat <<

    WOW !!! What a review! Thank you so much! Your compliments are very very uplifting, just what I needed about now.

    i am happy to be nominated for POM and congratulations to you too! There are so many excellent poems in this month,
    I don't expect to win but when reviewers tell me how much they like my poem and how it touches them in some way, that is all the reward I really need. Thank you for the condolences but ten years after (remember that old band?) the wound has healed and I have moved past that point. September seems to bring it all back again. But this year. my daughter and me actually spent the 10 year anniversary by going to see the Professional Bull Riders show. We both had some fun and the day passed without wallowing in what can't be changed. I was afraid this form was too rhymy for such a serious topic but it has done very well. I'll have to modify the scheme and writer another one lol.

    Thank you so much!!! I'll review yours soon, if not tonight, tomorrow night for sure!. I hope you are doing well and your family is too!

    Thanks for reviewing! and all of your compliments.

    BTW Poem IS two syllables LOL :):)

    hugs...
    Rodger


Comment by
JennaG
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Rating of Chapter 12 -
September's Song
This poem truly touched me. I apologize, I think I initially read it back when you first posted it, but must've gotten distracted and failed to review it. It stuck with me, however, and now seems to apply to my own life. My husband's father died on the 14th of this month and I know every September from now on will always remind us of that heartbreaking loss. I think you've expressed the feelings of loss so skillfully and beautifully in your poem. I especially liked the imagery you've created with "autumn breezes stir and groan", "bending branches scratch and sway" and "wind-blown leaves perform ballet". I don't think I've ever tried writing a Ballade. I love experimenting with different forms and may have to try this one out some time. Thanks for including the details in your author's notes. I'm so very sorry to read about the loss you've experienced. This poem is so sad, but I found it comforting as well and I think my husband would, too. It's a truly beautiful piece. :)


 Comment Written 30-Sep-2016



reply by the author on 30-Sep-2016
    Hi Jenna,
    Please don't feel badly, I do that all the time too! I'm sad to read of the loss your family has suffered just a few weeks ago. My condolences to you, your husband and family. It warms my heart to know my writing can bring comfort to someone going through the grieving process. It does get better as time moves along but I'll always think differently about September.

    I'd love to read a Ballade poem from your pen, I'm sure you could handle this form beautifully! I'm going to write another one
    but change the rhyme scheme. All those mono-rhymes are too restrictive!

    Thank you very much for your kind and uplifting comments and generous six star rating.

    All the best,
    Rodger

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