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Reviews from
Can't Want To Daddy


a long journey in a short tale

  39 total reviews 
Comment by
GregoryCody
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Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
I'm so sorry. Let me start with that.

This story is INCREDIBLY worded. Your voice is so strong. And the voice of the girl, I love how you didn't capitalize. Adds to the innocence.

Some of my favorites;

Stalking the black
Large and demanding.

Ooh a chameleon that never changes color.

Cup a harmonica

Actually I keep pulling them out. Honestly, every word is perfectly placed. I LOVE unique metaphors. My favorite.

This was absolutely incredible. I TRULY mean that.

Perfectly deserved...



 Comment Written 20-Jul-2015



reply by the author on 20-Jul-2015
    No need to be sorry... ok? Seriously... it's over. done. all done. undone. ;)
    Where have we heard that before? hmmm...?

    oh yeah. Another lifetime.
    Thanks Greg, Truly... I wrote this short... way back in .... 1989? 1990? When I was taking a non-fiction writing class at the University of Alaska, Anchorge... I was considering a Master's in Creative Writing... This was an upper division literature class... lots of fun to take. And one of only two writing classes I've ever taken, actually. I loved it. (I made an A) ;)
    Thanks so much for your support... and this lovely and most generous rating as well
    Cat

reply by GregoryCody on 21-Jul-2015
    Haha. You "made a A". That's funny sounding. What was your undergrad

reply by GregoryCody on 21-Jul-2015
    Haha. You "made a A". That's funny sounding. What was your undergrad

reply by the author on 21-Jul-2015
    Art, Marketing

reply by GregoryCody on 21-Jul-2015
    I always wanted to do Marketing. I went into Finance with an accelerated focus on Risk Management and Derivatives. I use it everyday!

reply by the author on 21-Jul-2015
    cool. I wanted to do more art, maybe fashion merchandising or graphic design... but the university I had my full scholarship to didn't offer it at the time (I was a trend setter in 1980?) so it was either teach children or go into marketing... so yeah. I chose the wrong field. Little did I know that I'd ever have a fondness for teaching kids art. But I did. (eventually)... oh well, live and learn.
Comment by
ellie6
 
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Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
A harrowing but excellent account. Reading various forums I begin to realise just how common abuse is. A hidden menace. It is good that you managed to speak to your father at last, it seems as if it contributed to closure for you.


 Comment Written 20-Jul-2015



reply by the author on 20-Jul-2015
    Ellie
    Yes, it's true... for me, confrontation was the key to closure.
    Thank you so much for this very generous review and rating
    Cat
Comment by
Jumbo J
 
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Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Hi Cat,
this was an exquisite piece of writing... poetic in it's pain, and sticking to my thoughts like judgement day came way to late. The excuses we lay so easily and readily at the feet of such evil. My question, how did you forgive your mother?
Did she fight for you when your snakes were coming, did she lie with you after they pierced your frail little heart and skin?

You say in your notes... the abuse stopped years ago... maybe the physical, but never the mental... it takes a life time to process.

A very brave and honest write... all the very best in this contest, for me this is already a winner, but it would be nice to have it confirmed.

With our thoughts we create,
snakes alive,
James vx's.


 Comment Written 19-Jul-2015



reply by the author on 19-Jul-2015
    James,
    What a dear and wonderfully thoughtful and caring review...

    How did I forgive my mother? Well... for a long time, my memories were repressed... somehow, I blocked things out... yet when I was a little kid, my mother and I were at odds, and my father was the one (they say) with which I responded to more. They say that often happens.
    Yet, once they divorced when I was eleven years old... things changed and I became her protector, but I didn't 'remember' all the other stuff (except for those nightmares which started in my teens and continued until my late 20's)

    My thyroid stopped working after a series of surgeries to repair my jaws ( a childhood injury ) in my late 20's, and I went into a severe clinical depression... at that time, I started seeing a team of specialists who were treating me for chronic TMJ pain. The psychologist used hypnotherapy to find out why I was having the nightmares and found that I was repressing memories of the molestation. I went straight to the telephone (brave thousands of miles away!) and confronted my father about the abuse, and he admitted it! WTF?
    and the saga began...
    After that, it was a series of haunting things which flooded back. i had been relatively happy between the ages of 11 and 28... and it was only after the confrontation that I even started to remember. But it was then that the nightmares stopped. They just stopped. I never had another one.

    It was years later that I told my mother (who was like a best friend to me) that I was angry with her, because as a mother, i couldn't understand how she could let it happen... we cried, and we went to therapy together and we worked it out. She apologized and she truly had no idea. she knew he beat us... (hell, all parents beat their children back then, didn't they?) but she had no idea about the other stuff.
    And so... it has just been a process.

    So now you know the rest of the story.

    I can't believe I just typed all that... and if this site swallows it all up, I will just say, Thank you James. :)
    Anyway, it means the world that it has touched you and that you find it worthy of the win. Truly. I thank you.
    Cat
Comment by
Treischel
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Some fathers don't deserve a Father's Day celebration. Those of the kind that you describe here. Your poem evokes the horror, rationalizations, and even some underlayment. For actions there are consequences, unfortunately that applies more to the victims. My dad was a son of a bitch too, he did his damage with his emotional and physical abuse. Mine came from constant criticism and freely applied beltings. The welts eventually healed.


 Comment Written 23-Jun-2015



reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
    ((((((Treischel))))))
    I know too well about those beltings... so cruel were they I never EVER raised a hand, or anything else to my children. I'm so sorry you had to endure those things... But look! Look how awesome a father you've become! And a loving husband and amazing poet and friend as well. Survivors... that's how we got to here, right?
    Thanks for this very thoughtful review
    Cat

reply by Treischel on 23-Jun-2015
    Right! And I can even visit his grave now and not want to piss on it. ... I am tempted to take a sledge hammer to it sometimes, but haven't yet.

reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
    Ohhhhhh... if only I could do that!
    WEll, that... and the military put his ashes in a really high up box in their cemetery... and I would feel badly peeing in their nice establishment... but hey, I have a sledgehammer if you need some help on YOUR dad's grave! LOL ;)
Comment by
2019 Short Works Writer of the Year
Ideasaregems-Dawn
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Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Oh, Cat, I am so sorry...what an incredible piece you've written - how sorrowful, how brave and technically flawless. You are an incredible person. In the short time we've known each other I can tell you are a loving, fun, and funny woman with great strength. I can see such amazing talent in everything you write, too.
This is just exceptional - masterful writing, sure to help others. My last six is yours.


 Comment Written 23-Jun-2015



reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
    Dawn,
    As I said in the PM i sent you... I truly appreciate this lovely review and the time taken to give it. Also, the generosity of the rating as well.
    I think you're pretty amazing as well and am glad that we've met. I look forward to getting to know you better!
    CAt

reply by Ideasaregems-Dawn on 23-Jun-2015
    Oops. Better go check messages. LOL
Comment by
Walu Feral
 
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G'day Cat. You are one heck of a good scribe mate. Whilst this story is horrifying and all too familiar to me it is one of the best I have ever read. You have a flair for story telling in both poetic form and in this form and you have my respect my friend. Well done, cheers Fez and Delia


 Comment Written 23-Jun-2015



reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
    Fez and Delia,
    You two rock!
    Thanks so much... yes, I worried about members such as yourself, Fez, when posting things like this... I feel there should be a
    ****Trigger Warning**** on things like this as well as the usual warnings... But that the Trigger Warning should come about two inches above the work and allow the reader the time to bail out of the work if the want to.
    Last week during the voting process in one of the booths, i came across a horrific photo on a poem in one of the contest which horrified me so badly that i took to the back of the house and curled up in the fetal position for half an hour. I finally found the ovaries to call a friend (it was very late and I was alone)... I had to call a friend halfway around the world that I knew would be awake, so that I wouldn't wake him. And I just sobbed for a long time... poor man! LOL
    But it was so bad... I can't even believe things like that are allowed... but they should definitely have a warning!
    They used to make it where a splash page would come up... but now, you have to include a sexual warning and make swear they are over 13 or 18 for that... and I'm not even sure they have that anymore... But these things are not about SEX...
    It's more of a TRIGGER.

    I worry about that all the time. And so, my point being... I certainly hope that it didn't trigger you in any way. ((((((Fez)))))

    *waves at Delia*... I"m sure your Sleeping Beauty will give you big hugs...
    Take care and thank you for such lovely words of encouragement!
    Cat

reply by Walu Feral on 23-Jun-2015
    You're welcome mate. No triggers for me, in fact the only time I get a trigger is when I upset some bugger who greatly needs it and they pull a gun on me LOL.
Comment by
giraffmang
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Hi there,

This is a very emotionally charged write.

The opening is chilling in its presentation.

I was not abused as a child, but have worked with many children and young people who were. Devastating, and heart wrenching, like this piece.

GMG


 Comment Written 23-Jun-2015



reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
    GMG
    Yes, it is... sometimes it needs to be said... sometimes... well, some days I just want to move on and do something else. LOL
    Thanks so much for this review
    Cat
Comment by
valerieellis
 
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This is heart-wrenching but eloquently written. It evoked strong emotions...I was once that little girl (not at the hands of my father though...). My eyes looked much like yours...sad, hollow, empty, and lost. It amazes me how much pain and betrayal a human soul can endure and survive. We ARE survivors and this writing proves how blessed we truly are to be victorious. Thank you for sharing. God bless...and God bless the many other hurting children.


 Comment Written 22-Jun-2015



reply by the author on 22-Jun-2015
    Valerie,
    Yep... couldn't have said it any better, my dear (((((hugs)))))
    Cat
Comment by
Amsterdam
 
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Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
It wasn't him,
It was the alcohol....

He hated himself, for good reasons.
His life, his parents, their way.

He knew nothing else.

From beyond the grave...

I am nothing.
You are everything.
I am sorry.

Let only me feel the shame.
I, only I am to blame.

You, are very brave.

am


 Comment Written 22-Jun-2015



reply by the author on 22-Jun-2015
    nah... It's 'vomit' writing.
    Those of us who wish to no longer
    shove the shame up our own......
    aspirations,
    will spew it forth.

    feels better, but if you don't rinse afterward,
    you'll ruin your teeth.
    (I learned that from a friend who was bulimic)

    ;)
    *squeezes...not so hard as to squeeze the cream out*

    Thanks Am... really. *smiles softly*
    Cat

reply by Amsterdam on 22-Jun-2015
    Well I guess its better than a seven state murder spree....
    Yea, keep writing...

    am
Comment by
oNray
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Nice writing Cat. A taught thing to hash over I am thinking, but well told. I had a dad that was drunk all the time but thank God he never touched my sister or me that way. Mom would have killed him.


 Comment Written 22-Jun-2015



reply by the author on 22-Jun-2015
    Yeah... I suppose my mother should have, but you know... he wasn't worth dying for. Truth.
    It's REALLY nice to see you here, I hope you are well. :)
    Cat
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