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Reviews from
Walking Away From War


Can you go home again?

  44 total reviews 
Comment by
kiwisteveh
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Poet Rating
  Rank:  95
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Review Stars
  Rank:  316
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
It's been a long time between, but I saw this and remembered, 'Oh, yeah, he can write these warts and all historical and anti-war things too!' And I wouldn't mind seeing and reading more of them either.

It is long and it drew me in slowly and worked its magic gradually. So real, it's like you'd been there - a wonderful and sobering imagination. I'm guessing there is some sort of literature around this immediate post-war period - I have a vague memory of a Stephen Crane story, also involving a 'ghost,' but you have a fine way of conveying what it MUST have been like.

Two wonderful characters and the smarts to know what to leave out. If I had a pack of sixes, I'd throw 'em at you.

Steve


 Comment Written 08-Feb-2016



reply by the author on 12-Feb-2016
    Thank you, Steve. You're right, I've been neglecting the historical fiction aspect of my writing. I've been wanting to write about the long walk home for a while, but never found the proper handle. Then, when I came across the Ben McCulloch/Pete Pelican story, I decided to try to weave a fictional story around that true story. I got lucky--my fictional characters had as much 'body' as the real ones.

    I like what you say about leaving stuff out. I know I always appreciate authors who trust me to fill in the blanks.

    Thanks again, Steve. I really appreciate this review. Peace, Lee
Comment by
Serendipity!
 
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Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This is quite amazing. You have a way of writing it that sounds so authentic, as if you were there :) and were recalling every nitty gritty deal. Keep it up!

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 Comment Written 08-Feb-2016



reply by the author on 12-Feb-2016
    Thank you, Serendipity. Sometimes it feels like I might have been there. Glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
Comment by
Marykelly
 
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Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Historical fiction gets depth from the characters and setting that are the backdrop for the story. The characters in this story are very well developed into real, believable people. The dialogue is exceptionally well done. You bring attention to the fact that even though the war is over the inner struggle and the physical hardships for the main character are far from over. Hacksaw seems like a guardian angel protecting a soldier making his way home. This adds another dimension to the story. well done

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 Comment Written 08-Feb-2016



reply by the author on 12-Feb-2016
    Thank you, Marykelly. You have a good understanding of the workings of historical fiction. I'm glad you found it believable. Peace, Lee
Comment by
Cumbrianlass
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Your best ever, I think, Lee. This was brilliant. Absolutely superb.

Marching, he'd decided, was the surest way to Hell. - great line.

but wirier than a buggy spring, and baked harder, and redder, than a brick. - awesome.

War is a voracious, sucking thing. - this feels like a change of tense. It's not in italics, so isn't a thought. Should it not, then, be 'War 'was' a voracious.... ?

I done some scountin' -jus' checkin', double-oh, that you mean scountin and not scoutin'. Being from over't pond, I'm not as up on your jargon as some. :)

"Everybody's hear'd of Ben McCulloch." - everyone except me. :(


Jasper savored the sight of his half of the cooked rabbit sitting on his mess tin. He wanted to cry. He wanted to wolf it down, yes, tear into it with his teeth and wolf it down with a barely a chew. But he also wanted to wrap it up, put it in his pocket . . . like treasure. Was he a ravenous animal, or an appreciative man? - superb paragraph. Truly.

contended sleep. - did you mean contented? Who's Ben McCulloch? Never mind. I'll Google him.


Maybe it would never be over. - It sure isn't over in South Carolina, I can tell you that much!

Even when the cannons went quiet on the hillsides, the echoes which lived in a soldier's mind could be just as lethal. Death from the inside. You are knockin' 'em out of the park, Lee.

"Hacksaw?" Aha!!!! I KNEW he'd be back. I KNEW he hadn't abandoned Jasper.

plump 'possum I got tucked in my poke." Aww. I like possums. Everyone says they're ugly. I think they're cute. Little North American kangaroos.


Pete Pelican?" Oh, FFS. Who's Pete Pelican?



He rolled over and looked into the eyes of Hacksaw Rabin. - is Hacksaw really an angel?

he's usin' me to help you get there." - Aha! I KNEW it.


"My earthy father - earthly ?

Wow. I agree. This does not merit being split.

Great piece of work. Sincerely. I'm in awe.

Bravo, Lee.

Av



 Comment Written 08-Feb-2016



reply by the author on 08-Feb-2016
    Thanks you so much, Av. I wondered if I was in over my head with this one. I really appreciate the validation.

    I love that you sensed the angel angle before I spilled it. I guess I did leave enough breadcrumbs.

    Thank you for the spag alerts, and the suggestions. I put the voracious line in italics so I wouldn't have to put it in the past tense. War IS a voracious, sucking thing.

    Ben McCulloch was a larger-than-life character on the western frontier. Pete Pelican was a celebrated Union sniper. By all reports, it was Pete who shot Ben out of his saddle at Pea Ridge.

    Again, Av, thanks for this validating review. Peace, Lee
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