Very well done! So true. That's one of the things I loved about my boyfriend who passed recently. He was so much younger he just lit up over new things, as opposed to the cynicalness of those older.
We need to remember what it's like to play and live without so much care and worry.
Thanks for sharing this great poem and reminder.
Comment Written 14-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 14-Feb-2016
Thank you for your review, kind words and excellent rating. Do stop by again.
What a fun poem, rife with alliteration and a playful rhythm that fits perfectly with the subject! It flows well overall and conveys exactly what you had hoped. I might only suggest that you use "hide" instead of "hid" in the third stanza to keep that sense that humans continually do this--it's not only in the past, and that the use of the contraction "child's not done" instead of "child isn't done" might read more smoothly and consistently with the rhythm that's been established. But those are very minor points and subjective at that. Nicely done!
Comment Written 13-Feb-2016
reply by the author on 13-Feb-2016
Thank you Dav54. I appreciate your critic; will make the corrections. Do stop by again.