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Two Line Poem
Deadline: Tomorrow!

75 Words Flash Fiction
Deadline: In 4 Days

5-7-5 Poem
Deadline: Jul 10th

This Sentence Starts The Story
Deadline: Jul 15th

Faith Poetry Contest
Deadline: Jul 22nd


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Rank

Poet: None
Author: None
Novel: None
Reviewer:None
Votes: None






Reviews from
Luella


A voice recalls a day of amoristic moments

  23 total reviews 
Comment by
Anuradha Dev
Premier Author
I am here to learn
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  289
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  165 (+1)
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
awesome writing! the buildup was excellent. and usually this kind of story leads to a one night stand , I am glad it did not go there. glad for happily ever after. well done!


 Comment Written 13-Jul-2019



reply by the author on 23-Jul-2019
    Thanks Anuradha. Check out my Debut Novel on Amazon, titled, Mirrors of Life. Thanks again for the exceptional review!
Comment by
kiwigirl2821
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  147
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  463
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Bravo! What a great story. I hope it's real and you did marry her! I was impressed with the story line and setting your scenes and then the development of your two characters was also excellent. Well written ... xoxo Kiwi


 Comment Written 28-May-2017



reply by the author on 28-May-2017
    Thank you for the review. The story is fiction. I'm pleased to hear you enjoyed the story. Thanks again!
Comment by
frierajac
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Happy there's a happy ending. And that you're the contest winner. I don't write
this kind of thing myself. although I wish. anyway, keep up the good work.


 Comment Written 22-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 22-Oct-2016
    Thank you for the review. I see you are a fan of romance but write a different genre. I will review your work.
Comment by
Ric Myworld
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  175
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Well, well, what a great way to start off my day. Caught up in a fairy tale world that could only happen once in a lifetime, or so it would seem, and here I sit just having to read and envision the fun you two were having. Thanks for sharing your fine read that would put idea in anyone's mind. Great job. :-)


 Comment Written 03-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 03-Oct-2016
    Wow! Thanks a lot! My goal in posting every story is to receive 6 stars. It's a great feeling when your work touches someone to receive an exceptional rating. I'm following a dream. I'm out there in hope. I resigned from a management job after 23 years to pursue a dream. I know I have the talent and I have stories to tell. When I receive an exceptional rating, my motivation increases.

    Ric, Thanks Again and God Bless!
Comment by
barkingdog
Premier Author
2013 #2 Ranked Novelist
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
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Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Ha! He decided that he liked snow. Great ending.
You deserved this first place win. Congratulations, Neal.
So much erotica writers just jump right into the sex scene. You took the time to develop your characters through dialogue and their interactions.
His first person narrative allowed us to see how much he was attracted to her, but that he behaved as a gentleman. This made him VERY attractive to the reader. He became her knight to the rescue. A knight that could cook and carry on a good conversation.

The sex scene was good, too. No problem there. Their evening enjoying each others company was perfect foreplay. You created desire not just lust.

:) e


 Comment Written 05-Jul-2016



reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
    Thank you! Because I respect your writing skills so highly, your reviews have a great impact to inspire and motivate.

    Thanks again!
Comment by
barbara.wilkey
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  6
Review Stars
  
 Rank:  35
 
barbara.wilkey Recommends:
St. Louis Chapter 31 part 1
Logan learns more about McKenzie's past.
Pays:10 points
10 member cents

 

#6 Ranked Novelist
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
I read this earlier this afternoon and then FS wouldn't let me leave a review; technical difficulties. This is one of the very best romantic erotica stories I have ever read. I loved it. I wish you the best in the contest.


 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016



reply by the author on 04-Jul-2016
    Thank you
    Barbara!
    I am horned and inspired by the six stars! Thank you got the review , exceptional rating, and the well wish in the contest. I am currently tied for first place.

    Thanks again!

reply by barbara.wilkey on 04-Jul-2016
    Thank you for letting me know about the voting. I just voted.

reply by the author on 04-Jul-2016
    Wow! Thank you! I thought you had already voted because you said that you read the story earlier today. Thank you for the support. Win, Lose, or Tie, I am happy because you are one of the several that rated my story exceptional.

    Thanks again! I will visit your profile page.
Comment by
Word Junkie
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Hello Author,

This is interesting. I wonder if we'll be experiencing massive snowstorms in 2066. Even though this is set fifty years in the future, the technology seems not to have changed much. In fifty years, it's possible that all our highways will be solar roadways, which will eliminate traffic hazards related to snow and ice.

That aside, the story is interesting, but I have difficulty with the logic of a man and woman meeting in this way, and then engaging in sexual relations after the man made such impassioned comments about being so deeply religious.

Some of the narration in this story is stilted, and difficult to understand. Phrases like...

Resigning myself from the monotony of boredom
With my thoughts in a fascination
saw her frustratingly dialing again
With a resonated smile

Your story seems to meet the criteria for the contest. Description is good, and dialogue adds to characterization.

Good luck!
Lana


 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016



reply by the author on 04-Jul-2016
    Hi, the voice is a man from the future remembering the past.

    I understand.
    Thank you for sharing
Comment by
GWHARGIS
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  81 (+9)
Author Rating For Novels
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  220
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
I really liked the story but a couple of parts threw me. Fifty years of wedded bliss so the time line is 2066. I also wished you had slowed or tempered the last paragraph. Maybe mention fifty years as you gaze down at her one night while the snow is falling outside. It just felt rushed in that last paragraph. It was a great story. Hretchen


 Comment Written 03-Jul-2016



reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
    Thank you. Good point ! I appreciate it very much . Your review is very helpful .
Comment by
c_lucas
 
Review Stars
  
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Dream on because some dreams come true. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very good read. Good luck in your contest.


 Comment Written 03-Jul-2016



reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
    Thank You! I appreciate the review and excellent rating
Comment by
2019 Script Writer of the Year
Bill Schott
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  43
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  11 (+1)
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  29 (+2)
Script Rating
  Rank:  3
Review Stars
  Rank:  10
 

#3 Ranked Script Writer
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This story unfolded well. The characters were given heroic qualities of chivalry and self-control, well, up to the sex scene. The characters' names suggested African American, which I further inferred as the spiritual side was revealed by Markeith. I don't read this type of literature except in this scenario, a contest, but I wouldn't expect a philosophical inquiry within the timespan of this encounter unless we're a part of the author's natural bent. You threw me at the conclusion with the 50th anniversary. The telling of the story must be in 2066, sin they married in 2016 and none of the telephonic devices would have been around in the sixties. I enjoyed reading the story.


 Comment Written 03-Jul-2016



reply by the author on 03-Jul-2016
    Thanks Bill. You are correct the man is in the future remembering the past. I put a lot of work into this story with the goal of winning the contest but the competition is tough. I can only hope I did enough.

    Thanks again!
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