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Reviews from
Moving Right Along


A nod to my soul mate

  7 total reviews 
Comment by
Xylok
 
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  Rank:  356 (+1)
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and yet you've never left said heart, despite the interim,
for fondness has no limits, and delights in requiem,
as poems as lovely as the smell the sea to sailors sends
leak from you across the cosmos to your distant friend
for though bold sunshine overpowers all it faces in battle
the war is often by the shadow.


 Comment Written 10-Sep-2016



reply by the author on 10-Sep-2016
    Oh wow. Aaron. I thought that I had lost you. PM me or email me and tell me where you are at with your poetry. I think about you and Lisa and the ever growing tornadoes often. I hit 71 on August 15. Still a ways to go before before the hundred. Workin' on it. I miss your words. Determined to hang in. We have a date in Arizona :-) You have put a big smile on my face. Love to you and yours - DJ xx
Comment by
closetpoetjester
Metronomaniacal
Tendancies
 
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  Rank:  122
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  Rank:  384
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
What a lovely poem Sax...superb internals and no I won't forget your hair-brained aspirations LOL
You rhyme like no other and who could make such joy from a single raindrop on a leaf as you?
When you talk about this person I feel the tenderness and compassion in your voice.

Perfect closer and the love that is described throughout resonates and trails off into the warm fuzzies

Well done
Sixer for you
Strawbies
xx


 Comment Written 05-Sep-2016



reply by the author on 05-Sep-2016
    Thanks Strawbs. Far too generous I reckon but I gotta love that gold cross :-) I actually revisited and did a minor edit. What's the old 'turnip'? Hiding behind every cynic is a hopeless romantic. Guilty as charged.

    hugs - DJ xx
Comment by
mfowler
 
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This is so damned sad, dj.

A reflective and melancholy seeking of something in the loss of a dearly loved partner.

There's a wonderful line to start:Take the time to take the time and have a look around ... The repetition hints of how hard it is to recover from loss, how hard it is to look beyond the grief and start again.

Sure there's joy in the beauty of a raindrop, but that's only the beginning of the journey back. Too many tears to go yet.

vs 2 exults what the relationship meant, but closes with regret at loss and reconnection to the notion of starting again. That you say she chose to join God because of his will, shows that she may have been a believer and the voice of the poem might have some reservation or cynicism about the great beyond.

It's just one of those unanswerable conflicts of human belief and the need to understand.

Great versification. Good metre and rhyme allowing the words and natural imagery to find a place in the reader's mind.

A sensitive, fine work.


 Comment Written 30-Aug-2016



reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
    Thanks mark. My wife passed many years ago now and i have moved on, but just occasionally I miss her dreadfully. I am very lucky in my beautiful daughter and my friends, who taught me how to laugh again :-) I guess that both my wife and myself DID believe in God. we just didn't get along with him very well. Thanks again, my friend - DJ
Comment by
BeasPeas
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When one leaves another enters, but we're still left with the remembrance of all that went before. We grieve some more than others and some we don't really grieve at all. It's just one of those things. Good rhyming and word choices in this interesting poem. Marilyn


 Comment Written 28-Aug-2016



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2016
    Thank you Marilyn. one of my sentimental moments. Cheers - DJ
Comment by
DR DIP
 
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  Rank:  550
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
DJ! that is beautifully written, you softie you. written AABB rhyme scheme you certainly captured the mood and emotion of a lost loved one. Not your usual satirical poem..I like your soft side lol


dip


 Comment Written 28-Aug-2016



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2016
    Hey Dipster. Very generous mate. The soft side doesn't surface too often. I think i must have been channeling you :-) DJ

reply by DR DIP on 29-Aug-2016
    haha yep you must have been you old romantic you you notice i never mentioned meter? lol
Comment by
country ranch writer
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sometimes in life we are taken to soon and all we have left are the memories we have shared together and it makes us sad because they are not by our side to share in the memories


 Comment Written 28-Aug-2016



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2016
    Thank you for your kind review. The loss of any loved one is always difficult. Cheers - DJ

reply by country ranch writer on 30-Aug-2016
    s m I l e
Comment by
2014 Novelist and 2016 Short Works Writer Of The Year
Phyllis Stewart
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If I could only match my tears to wash away the grief

Great line. A sad poem about a love lost to death. Hope it's not based on your own loss. The last line is hopeful and upbeat, which is a relief to those of us who prefer happy endings. :)


 Comment Written 28-Aug-2016



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2016
    Thank you Phyllis. Sadly. I did lose my wife and soul mate many years ago to cancer but i am blessed with a beautiful daughter and great memories. Cheers - DJ
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