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Reviews from
Sometimes Roses, Sometimes Thorns


Viewing comments for Chapter 7 "A Mountain's First To See the Dawn"

A collection of sonnets

  14 total reviews 
Comment by
2018 Poet of the Year
Gloria ....
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  Rank:  5 (+1)
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  Rank:  87
 

#5 Ranked Poet
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What a fine Petrarchan sonnet this is, Mav. Love the photograph of the wild horse too. Horses are quite majestic.

First off your title is almost a poem in itself. Your octet clearly states a sense of the philosophical and the slightest note of desolation with some dark force wishing ill.

Then in the sestet the turn is made as is a decision. Alone is alone. Your hunger for life shows through vividly with the line, you've warmed my hungry heart and helped me cope. And there! See it! The mountain of strength is the first to break through the misty cloud of solitude of night.

Wow, I am deeply honoured my post inspired this incredible sonnet. It is a beauty and the old grey horse will gallop up the slope.

Fantastic poem.

Ange



 Comment Written 18-Sep-2016


Comment by
robyn corum
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 Rank:  15
 

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Wowzer, Mikey. You're pulling out the big guns with this one. *smile* I see this as a man saying, 'there's a great possibility that my love will be spurned, but what can be gained if I don't even try?'

I like this -- (even though I don't usually like sonnets.) *smile*

Thanks!


 Comment Written 13-Sep-2016


Comment by
Pearl Edwards
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The sonnet always seems like it must be hard to get the correct flow but when I read this Petrarchan Sonnett (never heard of it before) it just reads beautifully.
They always seem emotional poems and this one is not exception, beautifully done mikey.
cheers,
valda


 Comment Written 13-Sep-2016


Comment by
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Pantygynt
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I love the imagery of the last two lines here and the Petrarchan form abbaabba is faithfully reproduced in the octave. In the sestet I am less sure of myself as there are pronuciation differences betweenn our two versions of English. I imagin you are rhyming or near rhyming dawn with alone and known to run the cdcdcd rhyme scheme option, or are you saying that dawn is an e rhyme giving a sestet of cdcded?
Anything seems to go in the sested as long as there is no concluding rhyming couplet.


 Comment Written 13-Sep-2016


Comment by
frierajac
 
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I especially like the feeling of overcoming a barrier.

I have an issue with using any work twice in a poem unless in a refrain.

I like the layout of the words that seem to blend in with the lines of the horse's
mane.


 Comment Written 13-Sep-2016


Comment by
winnona
 
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A well-written poem. your words flow nicely line to line combining and forming their own unique rhythm then continuing on combining and forming the message of the poem to send the reader.


 Comment Written 13-Sep-2016


Comment by
nordicgirl
 
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Wow. I have not seen you write like this in a long time. Please, read more of your friends work, I do understand.
I adore this. WOW!! What a thrilling ending. I can see that horse sreaming up that slope and I am cheering him/you on. Brautiful. NG


 Comment Written 13-Sep-2016


Comment by
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Realist101
 
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Nice! I also love the photo of the horse. Powerful. I like what this says too. I think it describes many of us. We try. We keep trying and sometimes never do prevail. At least that's how I read this. Nice work! :)


 Comment Written 12-Sep-2016


Comment by
Sefiros
 
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There's always greater forces working in your poems. You admit that will and circumstance both have their roles in the actions we make, but you point out that merely giving effort is not enough to stem the tide in will's favor. You draw faith from non-animate structures: in this case the mountain. Nice job.


 Comment Written 12-Sep-2016


Comment by
Susanne M. Psyris
 
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  Rank:  505
 
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Absolutely perfectly executed Petrarchan Sonnet!!! I can't say how beautiful and moving this was for me. I truly love this one...shall have to read Gloria's to see your inspiration here. Absolutely worthy of the six-star rating I am giving you!!! God bless and hugs, Susanne


 Comment Written 12-Sep-2016


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