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Reviews from
Endless Stew


A loose metaphor for life.

  34 total reviews 
Comment by
IndianaIrish
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  Rank:  484
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
I sure would love to spend a few hours in your head, hw, and have a gab session with the people who inhabit your brain. Sonia, Roy, and Lucy are characters a reader grabs onto and holds them close. I so respect and envy your ability to provide pinpoint imagery without tedious useless telling descriptions. You're expert use of similies, metaphors and humor makes your story related le and personal. Sophia is a good one and I like when you write with a woman's POV. I enjoyed this story and its characters immensely, hw.
Smiles,
Indy :-)


 Comment Written 27-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
    Ah, Thanks so much, Indy. My head is a cluttered place, but I'll always have room for you! And I think you'd fit right in. Just remember to bring something outlandish we can plant in Smitty's closet. I don't see a big difference when writing from the female perspective. And sitting while peeing affords me a welcome break.

    This one is special to me, Indy. And your sixer puts it in the top ten of the All Time Best. At the moment, 3 of the stories I've written this year are among the top ten All Time. Four, if you consider stories from other years.

    Thank you again.

    Peace, Lee
Comment by
TheWriteTeach
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  Rank:  647
 
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Eeew, Lee! The mouse in the potato chip bag put me off. Then you went on to say the mouse was meat for your stew and really put me off. The next thing you know, you're talking about maggots - yuck! I think you wanted to gross us all out with this piece, Lee, because you move right on to the cabbage causing Sophia to toot in harmony with Cary Grant, making for a symphony. Love the skunk's name - Stripe - very apropos. All goofing aside, this was a nice story. I really like the idea of the endless stew; take some out, put some back in; the pot's never been emptied, and has simmered for over a decade. I think that description is awesome. It correlates with life so well.

I noticed a couple of spags:

'. . . a tarp tent pitched high on [the/a] crest of the . . . .' (You just omitted a word.)

'. . . all prefer to park down on the road and huff it up the slope[,] afoot.' (Need to set a parenthetical expression apart from the rest of the sentence with a comma.)

"Now[,] don't you go tempting me, Sophia." (Introductory word(s) need to be set apart with a comma.)

'. . . let's check your stakes and add [a] few more tie-downs." (Left out a word.)

He'd had to slip-slide his way up the levee[,] afoot. (Need to separate a parenthetical expression from the rest of the sentence with a comma.)

"But[,] I can't let you lug a stewpot down that murderous hill." (You need a comma after introductory words.)

This was excellent, Lee. You did a great job with this.

Suzanne


 Comment Written 26-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
    Thank you, Suzanne. I'm sorry I grossed you out with the mouse and such. But that's kind of business as usual for Sophia.
    The rice and maggots, well, that kind of gave me the squirms, too. I'm going to have to disagree with you about a couple of the commas, even though I know you're right--technically.

    You suggest I write 'Now (pause) don't you go tempting me ...' But, Suzanne, I don't hear a pause there. I don't want to hear a pause there. When the Sheriff speaks, he doesn't pause after every 'Now'. Yes, the rule calls for a comma. You're right. But (pause) in this case the rule suggests something--a pause--that does not exist. If the Sheriff didn't pause after 'Now', why am I compelled to imply he did? Suzanne, I don't argue for the willy-nilly abandonment of the rules of grammar and punctuation. On days I wear shirts with formal collars, I go so far as to describe punctuation as 'the reader's road signs'. But (no pause) sometimes I dress more casually. As a result, I leave out certain punctuation on purpose--because I want the reader to read sans that particular punctuation. I understand if you don't think punctuation can be 'optional', but I do. I tend to write colloquially. I write what I hear. And I don't always hear a pause after every 'Now' or 'But'. Or, before every 'afoot'.

    No, I'm not an anarchist! It's important to have rules. But (no pause) I don't think they need to apply where the author (and I use the term loosely) believes the rule shouldn't apply. Okay, maybe I am an anarchist.

    Suzanne, I know you're right--technically. But I believe I'm right, too. There needs to be some leeway. Or, Lee's way.

    That doesn't mean I don't want, and value, your grammatical help. I'm just saying I'll push back (respectfully) once in a while. Cool?

    Peace, Lee

reply by TheWriteTeach on 27-Oct-2016
    I agree with you 100%. Authors must write in ways that work for them. If breaking a few rules in order to make something work - well, why not? Doesn't that fall under poetic license? Not being in the author's head can make reviewing problematic at times. You push back whenever there's a need - no problems!

    Suz

reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
    Thank you, Suzanne. Please don't feel 'problematic' with me. Mostly I agree with you, and welcome the help. When we disagree, that's good, too. It gives me a chance to test myself. When I have to explain myself, I have to have my ducks in a row. That's good. I can't wing it with you.
    I don't break the rules lightly. You won't let me. I treasure that oversight.
    I also respect your willingness to grant me some leeway--assuming I have a reasonable case. I think I'm in love.

    Thank you, Suzanne.

    Lee

reply by TheWriteTeach on 28-Oct-2016
    :o)
Comment by
gene roush
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
you're always entertaining.
I could ramble on here, but I don't really have anything to say.
So, great stuff, thanks for sharing
Gene


 Comment Written 26-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
    Thank you, Gene. The extra star says a lot. I'm really glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
Comment by
Halfree
 
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  Rank:  423
 
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Like the story, read it twice. Thought, at times. Similes were a bit much. However you ability as a story teller, carried the day. The independent woman, living life on her own terms, came across very well. I sometime think, when I write, that I am just a bit strange and then I read you and I believe being strange and different ain't all that bad. Like your stuff like a hog likes a mud wallow, keep at it.


 Comment Written 26-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 26-Oct-2016
    Hell, Hal, writing is a license to be strange . . . or, maybe, being strange is a license to be a writer. Goes both ways.

    Yeah, I know I get heavy-handed with similes and metaphors, but I don't care. My plots tend to be skinny, so my baloney has to be fat. Honestly? My stories are naked clotheslines from which I hang colorful turns of phrase. See? I can't stop myself.

    To have a man I respect read my story twice--and still like it? I ain't gettin' all wrong.

    Thanks, Hal. You know the respect is mutual. I'd take up beer drinking to spend a couple hours in conversation with you. What am I saying? I'll already drink more beer than Major League Baseball.

Comment by
trumby
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
I can relate to this one. "Endless Stew" is actually pretty good tucker, especially when going roo-shooting while cooking.
Another noble effort, good sir.
Your writing is always outstanding, mate, no matter what the setting.
Thanks for sharing. .


 Comment Written 26-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
    Thanks so much, Trumby. I live on stews and chilis all winter. As you say, good tucker. A good story should be a bit like stew--hearty, a little sweet, a little salty, and down to earth. Thanks again, my friend. Peace, Lee
Comment by
kiwisteveh
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  Rank:  184
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
This is crammed full of humour and pathos and salt of the earth characters, stitched together with your own particular brand of sneaky laugh-a-minute stuff.

The pernickety old woman with a stubborn streak, the kindly sherriff with a wife to match and the humdinger of a storm combine for a heart-warming tale. Oh, and we shouldn't forget Stripe. Who has a pet skunk for Pete's sake.

I guess the more serious side revolves around that endless stew that is life.

I'm sure you could find a publisher for this...

Steve


 Comment Written 25-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
    Thank so much, Steve. I'm always anxious to read your reviews. You know what to expect from me. I expect that wears on you some. But I try to throw in a few curveballs even you won't see coming. Mostly, though, I'm comfortable writing the stuff that comes to me. More than comfortable, if you want the truth. I'm enjoying myself.

    Thank you again.

    Peace, Lee
Comment by
robyn corum
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  Rank:  17
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  Rank:  24
 
Excellent
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Lee,

Go on... how you do that! *smile* It's so much fun to watch you reel those out. Like watching an experienced fisherman play with a big catch. Love it!

Favorite lines:
--> (I could feel the tent pegs losin' some of their grip. But nothin' could be done about that now.) They'd hold, or they wouldn't.
--> The wind swore nasty.

Thanks for the trip!


 Comment Written 25-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
    Thank you, Robyn. Frankly, I don't know. I'm a sixty-five year-old hermit living with a cast living in my head that DeMille would envy. And I'm enjoying it. What the kerfuffle? Thanks again. Peace, Lee
Comment by
heisemg
 
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Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Best I have read on this site
"By sundown, the sky was low as a banker's heart, and nearly as black"
Now that is some writing. I am from Missouri, by the way grew up along the Mississippi River and you brought back some memories of those folks who lived on the river side of those levees. Keep up the good work.


 Comment Written 25-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 27-Oct-2016
    Thank you so much, heisemg. I'm delighted you enjoyed this story. And that it triggered memories for you.
    Doesn't get better for me. Peace, Lee
Comment by
DonandVicki
 
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I haven't checked the dictionary yet to see what kerfuffle means but nevertheless less you story caught my imagination and was an enjoyable read.


 Comment Written 25-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 25-Oct-2016
    Oh, kerfuffle is just one of those noises people make when they can't latch onto the proper word. It often replaces a cuss.
    Thank you. Glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
Comment by
giraffmang
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  Rank:  275
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Hi Lee,

Well, no one writes characters and dialogue like you do, my friend. Always unique, always interesting and the way you employ a canny turn of phrase is unparalleled.

Super stuff
G


 Comment Written 25-Oct-2016



reply by the author on 25-Oct-2016
    Thank you, G. You've got my formula down to tee. Sometimes it works better others. I'm glad you like this one--Sophia and Roy really spoke to me. Thanks so much. Peace, Lee
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