|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Comment by | | Premier Author | | | Premier Reader | | | Poet Rating
 | Author Rating For Short Works
 | Author Rating For Novels
Rank: 1 | Script Rating
| Review Stars
 Rank: 12 | | | |
|
|
|
|
I am moved beyond words that you should use my poetic form as the vehicle for this fine tribute to the Normandy invaders. The meter and rhyme scheme are of course spot on and the tribute is well illustrated. IO particularly liked the reference back to the first world war in the photo of a WWI soldier with his head in his hands. The length of his puttees gives that date away.
The photo that immediately follows the poem, veteran in the cemetery, is however strangely out of place as his cap badge shows him to be part of the British parachute regiment. They certainly played a major part in the invasion but not over the beaches, which is what this poem is specifically about. I am not for a moment suggesting that you should remove the pic as it helps to remind us of the combined ops nature of the invasion and the sentiments are just right.
Thank you for this. I wish I had a six.
|
Comment Written 11-Nov-2016 |
|
|
| |
|
|
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2016
That was my intent for adding both pictures you specifically mentioned, Jim.
To illustrate, as best I could, how all nations had to learn to come together and work as one efficient, coherent unit to defeat a great enemy.
The WWI pic was used to show that our enemies hadn't learned their lesson for having been roundly defeated their first go 'round.
The horror still continued years later.
As far as sixes go, it really isn't that important to me, although I am very grateful for every one I am fortunate enough to get.
What IS important i if the poem struck a chord within you and made you feel something.
Thanks so much for your glowing comments.
The pantygynt is an outstanding form to work with.
~Dean
|
|
reply by Pantygynt on 11-Nov-2016
I am so glad you thi.nk so. You did it more than justice. Thank you
|
|
reply by the author on 11-Nov-2016
I wouldn't want it any other way, Jim, especially not on this topic.
Thanks again.
~Dean
|
|
|
|
|
|
Comment by | | Premier Author | | | Premier Reader | | | Poet Rating
Rank: 61  (+1) | Author Rating For Short Works
Rank: 37 | Author Rating For Novels
| Script Rating
 | Review Stars
Rank: 74 | | | |
|
|
|
|
Hi Deano
You've done a fantastic job with this poem for Remembrance Day. We have no idea what they went through, or the sacrifices they made... for us. I watched "Saving Private Ryan" the other night. It's a good representation. As you write,
"Our LCPs soon hit the shore;
the doors fell open wide,
as hails of bullets rent and tore;
so many good men died."
The Pantygynt is the perfect poetry form for this historic landing. The Nazi skull is your signature on these fine lines of talent.
I especially liked the v's and w's in the opening line,
"We braved the walls of waves in droves"
likewise the d's and g's here,
"The Nazi guns were dug in deep"
I like the alliteration here,
"as inch by inch, we crawled and creeped"
My favorite lines,
"Recruits poured in from far and wide;
each knew that God was on their side
to help us quell the Nazi tide
so people could live free."
Just one spot that tripped me up a bit,
"One by one, the batteries fell;
the Hun were on the run." ... I'm wondering if it should be,
the Huns were on the run."
Nicely penned, Dean! Thanks for writing and sharing this one.
cheers,
Kimbob
|
Comment Written 11-Nov-2016 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Comment by
|
|
|
|
| A very well-written poem and an excellent presentation that takes us right into the center of the battlefield. We thank them for their bravery and sacrifices, we see the damages that are done to their souls, but still we have the need to make war for peace.
|
Comment Written 11-Nov-2016 |
|
|
|
|
|
Up For ReviewStand Out WritingAdditional Reading
