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Reviews from
Legend of Timpanogos


Myth of the Mountain

  30 total reviews 
Comment by
winnona
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
A very well written contest entry. This poem has meant the contest challenge very well. The words flowed well line to line combining and telling the story for the reader. Good luck in the contest. Very well done.


 Comment Written 14-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 21-Jan-2017
    Thank you for the good luck wishes and the encouraging comments about the poem.
Comment by
marinadawn
 
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Excellent
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I like your tales best of all the different legends but I had hope that they would have had a happy ending, I still like those live happily after endings, nice mountain scene


 Comment Written 14-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 22-Jan-2017
    Thank you for your kind comments about the poem. I am pleased your liked it. I agree with you, I prefer the happy ending too.
Comment by
Jackarrie
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Hi, mystery author
I enjoyed reading your well-written poem, I love stories about legends and myths. You made it your own and turned it into a lovely story. Very sad what happened and you described it all so well in your poem. I wish you the best of luck in the contest. Mary


 Comment Written 14-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 22-Jan-2017
    Hi Mary,
    Thank you for the kind comments about the writing and the good luck wishes. Much appreciated.
Comment by
closetpoetjester
Metronomaniacal
Tendancies
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
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Excellent
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Wow a complete and very tragic love story. She sounds like a virteous woman who gave her all for the man with the emerald eyes. An excellent read and although epic I managed to stay with it for the duration. Some lovely rhyming throughout and I can tell you have worked hard on this. Very well done and I DID like the ending in spite of her ultimate sacrifice. Informative notes too, although the poem DOES stand alone.
Cheers P


 Comment Written 14-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 22-Jan-2017
    Thank you for sticking with the story until the end. It was a long poem. and that can be off putting for many people. I am glad you enjoyed it and the sad ending. I appreciate you taking time to read and review.
Comment by
nancyrabbrose
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  297 (+1)
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  186
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Your epic poem deserves all the stars I am able to give it. Well done. I used to live in Marin County, CA. There we have Mt. Tamalpais and there is an Indian maiden formation on the top of that mountain. I am happy to read your story. You did well to synthesize the many versions of the legend. Your poetry is First Class. Well done.


 Comment Written 13-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 22-Jan-2017
    I appreciate the six star rating and for you taking the time to read this very long poem. I am happy to hear you found a connection in your local. Your comment about the poetry being "First Class" has me smiling. Your brightened my day on several levels. Thank you.
Comment by
Quantum Traveler
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
The background color is well chosen for the Image Portrayed and enhances the coolness of the scene.
I find this writing to be excellent mix of the many tales of Mount Timpanogos.
An Outstanding Writing for a Poem of Length intertwining Legend and Nature.

Since I live nearby I take the opportunity to climb Mount Timpanogos yearly and connect with the Beauty of the waterfalls, alpine meadows and Aspen Groves.

Very Nicely Portrayed...Quantum Traveler...Phil.


 Comment Written 13-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 13-Jan-2017
    Hi Phil,
    After the contest I'll have to ask where you live. It must be in the area of the Mountain. Thank you for the excellent review. You made me smile. This is one of my favorite places.

reply by Quantum Traveler on 13-Jan-2017
    I'll be waiting...The Best to You On the Contest...Q.T...Phil.
Comment by
Mystic Angel 7777
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This certainly meets the requirement of lengthy. You do manage to tell a complete and compelling story. I have to say I found myself distracted as the meter is all over the place so while it is an excellent story you tell - it loses much of the beauty it could have simply because it lacks fluidity. If it had lacked rhyme, it could have been considered free verse so the inconsistent meter would be considered minor when compared to the content. I wish you the best in the voting and thank you very much for sharing it.


 Comment Written 13-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 13-Jan-2017
    Yes, it is long. Lack of consistent meter was on purpose. I tried both iambic and trochaic meters and decided it sounded too sing song in both. Sorry it distracted you. Thank your for your kind comments about the content and the best wishes. It is appreciated.
Comment by
davisr (Rhonda)
Premier Author
Rhonda
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
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Review Stars
  Rank:  158
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
A beautiful poem about star crossed lovers who loved each other as much as humans could do. In the end, the princess thought she had to die to save her people and leapt to her death. Her lover died of a broken heart. The mountain, lake and cave all bear evidence of this love and sacrifice.

Well done.
Best of luck in the contest,
Rhonda


 Comment Written 13-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 13-Jan-2017
    Hi Rhonda,

    Thank you for the analysis and gracious comments. I appreciate the good luck wishes as well.

Comment by
2016 Poet Of The Year
Dean Kuch
 
Review Stars
  
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Well, I gotta admit, when someone tells you to write a poem of "Great Length", you sure don't aim to disappoint, do ya?
Homer's Iliad ain't got nothin' on this as far as sheer girth goes.
You certainly rose to the challenge quite admirably as this epic excursion into Native American sacrificial practices and traditions pertaining to the Chief's lovely doomed daughter, Utahna, and her brooding brave, the ever-so-manly Red Hawk, comes crashing down Mount Timpanogosto a dramatic conclusion.
Exceptional, best of luck!
~Dean


 Comment Written 13-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 13-Jan-2017
    It is long, but it will never compare to the Illiad in scope or length. When I listened to the Illiad on tape it took a couple of weeks at an hour a day. I hope this doesn't feel that long.

    Thank you for the good luck wishes and the great review full of kind comments. I am pleased you found it exceptional.

reply by Dean Kuch on 13-Jan-2017
    I was only joking of course.
    It's really a great poetic love story. I don't see anything being able to top it in the contest, at least not by what I've read thus far.
    Best of luck.
    ~Dean :)

reply by the author on 13-Jan-2017
    I was teasing back. Thank you for the nice comments

reply by Dean Kuch on 13-Jan-2017
    You're very welcome.  photo c051001_zpsyhevgnvk.gif
Comment by
robina1978
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Nice photo of a snowy mountain that complements your poem perfectly. I'd never heard of the legend, but you managed to write it with detail and rhyme. A boy and girl in love but they die. Best wishes for the contest.


 Comment Written 13-Jan-2017



reply by the author on 13-Jan-2017
    Thank you for the good luck wishes and the kind comments. The picture is of Mount Timpanogos.
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