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Reviews from
Shipping Out


Moving out for parts unknown

  53 total reviews 
Comment by
dragonpoet
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  99 (+1)
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  69
 
Excellent
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This shows the pride you have in what you did, as you should be. It shows a positive aspect of war. Friendship is needed in this situation.
Thanks for your service.
The poem has an easy smooth flow with its abba quatrains and ending
couplet
Keep writing
Joan


 Comment Written 12-Nov-2019


Comment by
dmt1967
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  Rank:  272 (+1)
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  163 (+1)
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  Rank:  125
 
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This poem made me smile as well as cry. I can see a man leave what he calls home behind with a heavy heart and Go on to new things and places. Thank you for sharing.


 Comment Written 12-Nov-2019


Comment by
Susan Larson
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  Rank:  117
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  Rank:  23 (+2)
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  Rank:  61
 
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This really hit home with me. Today at our town's Veterans Day ceremony the keynote speaker read the oath all military say when they enlist. You could see men and women mouthing those words along with him. Very touching


 Comment Written 11-Nov-2019


Comment by
Dancemom
 
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This is a very great poem in honor of Veteran's Day. It is very well written with a nice flow. Thank you very much for sharing! Also, thank you very much for your service to our country. Great job!


 Comment Written 11-Nov-2019


Comment by
2019 Script Writer of the Year
Bill Schott
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  45
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  Rank:  15
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  Rank:  36
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  Rank:  3
Review Stars
  Rank:  10
 

#3 Ranked Script Writer
Excellent
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This poem, Shipping Out, written mostly with an ABBA rhyme scheme, reminds the readers of those cheerful days of youth. We bonded with laughter and now choose to only recall what brings joy. The life we live tests us to our core. Those foundations in friendship @nd love keep us faithful to what is important and worth defending.


 Comment Written 11-Nov-2019


Comment by
Diana L Crawford
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  Rank:  12
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  Rank:  118
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  Rank:  90
 
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Love this! It is so true that friendships build while serving and very hard to part from them when having to go to another location. I have many wonderful memories from serving in 1975-1978, but many have horrible memories they bring home of death and fear they may never overcome. Thanks for sharing this!! xoxo


 Comment Written 10-Nov-2019


Comment by
Gert sherwood
 
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  Rank:  37
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 Rank:  53
 
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Smiles to you jaybird1

I wish that my dad was still alive. He would say,
"Now there is a man who knows how to express his feelings of what he remembered when he was in War l"

Jaybird you did so well with your excellent way of sharing to those on Fanstory of you knowing how to express your self with your rhyming poem telling of your memorable days
when you were in the air force.

Gert



 Comment Written 10-Nov-2019


Comment by
Gypsymooncat
Level 1 Pro
Writing is choc
Writing is wine
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  127
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  Rank:  97
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Review Stars
  Rank:  118
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
I don't think anything compared to the camaraderie and loyalty that exists between soldiers, sailors, airmen and veterans. Your poem is brilliant, and should have been published if it wasn't way back then.

I could find no flaw in it and loved it's tone and impact.

Great work!


 Comment Written 10-Nov-2019


Comment by
patcelaw
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  Rank:  33
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  Rank:  28
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  Rank:  85
 
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Many of our men and women have in the years past, shipped out to face evil things that have left them scarred for life. My oldest brother in WWII watched two hundred soldiers that were offloaded from a ship he had crossed the pacific with be blown to bits from Japanese pilots.
Patricia


 Comment Written 10-Nov-2019


Comment by
Brenda Elizabeth Rose
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Poet Rating
 
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  Rank:  205
 
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Very well written poem and it did bring out the feeling of camaraderie in men and women after the war. You also gave the feeling many soldiers felt at that time. The rhyme and rhythm were perfect. Thank you for sharing this interesting piece with us. ~Brenda


 Comment Written 09-Nov-2019


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