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Reviews from
Brothers


Vietnam - a war without heroes

  59 total reviews 
Comment by
MissMerri
Merri, Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  24
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  251
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
I am so impressed with this amazing poem! It is incredibly descriptive, moving and beautiful in its language. I love that you told someone else's story in first person, which I feel enhances the reality of it as well as the accessibility. It is wonderfully told and I can see nothing to change at all ... except I think Bible is usually capitalized... at least in this context.

I know this will do well in the POM contest... and even win. It is truly amazing. I wish you all the best. (I too, love to tell other people's stories in first person. I don't see a lot of that, so I'm glad to find a fellow storyteller.)


 Comment Written 18-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 18-Sep-2017
    What a lovely review, thank you so much for such kind words.
    Mitchell
Comment by
LoannaLois
Lois Beery
Loanna
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
There are several reasons this deserves a 6 th star.
The first is the way we had to wait until the poem explained itself before we could silently
Applaud.
The second is to look at your word choices. Each one was necessary;
Then you spoke as if you were there. That was no easy feat.
I had lost six friends to that War. What insanity people revealed in themselves when they came home.


 Comment Written 30-Aug-2017



reply by the author on 30-Aug-2017
    What a wonderful review, thank you so much for such kind words and overwhelming rating.
    Mitchell
Comment by
Kerry Robinson
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  124 (+1)
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  321
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
This is an outstanding poem, my friend; my God, I got chills reading it. You wrote it beautifully. It's wonderful to draw inspiration from others life experiences. I'm sure, Bill would be very proud of this write. I loved every line of it, but this one is awesome, "ravaged by the razor edge of silence" very different, loved it all.
~Kerry


 Comment Written 29-Aug-2017



reply by the author on 30-Aug-2017
    What a wonderful review Kerry, thank you so much for such kind words and fantastic rating.

reply by Kerry Robinson on 30-Aug-2017
    Your very welcome, it was a truly real and heartfelt poem, wonderfuly written.
Comment by
Unspoken94
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
If I gave you less than a six, my brother would blast me. He served two tours in Vietnam and I couldn't have been prouder. I, on the other hand, was a leader in the New Mobilization Committee Against Vietnam War and demonstrated again and again in D.C.
I applaud your quality piece. Filled with beautiful imagery and metaphor. The structure is excellent. You have reported this man's testimony admirably. -Bill


 Comment Written 29-Aug-2017



reply by the author on 30-Aug-2017
    What a wonderful review, thank you so much for such kind words and fantastic rating.
Comment by
estory
Premier Author
north carolina
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  158
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  93
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  120
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
This is one of the best poems I've read on the site in a while. the voice is strained, struggling to come to terms with these emotions, the images are vivid and stark, the emotions flow freely in this piece. I loved this "Skull and skeleton, empty of mind, chained to the ocean bed" you get that great sense of the finality of death, the riveting motionlessness of it. "No words of thanks, just white knuckles on the kitchen wall, lugging my six string" all that frustration, all that loneliness of the unwelcomed soldiers. "Like dust settling on the sheet of a haunted house, my brothers, you will still be on my mind." these are some really unique, original images, very fresh, very poignant. estory


 Comment Written 29-Aug-2017



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2017
    What a wonderful review, thank you so much for such kind words and fantastic rating
Comment by
pipersfancy
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
A powerful and moving work filled with incredible imagery beginning in the opening line:
I can't outlive the grief of Vietnam

Having personal experience with a friend of mine who served a tour of duty in Vietnam, the following lines rang true and sent chills down my spine:
just my knuckle stains
dancing across the kitchen wall,
my bible
and stoned lonely nights

Sadly, my friend eventually found his peace through committing suicide.

One suggestion for consideration:
of how age has raced across my face
vs
of how age has raged across my face

I only made the suggestion because that is how I read it the first time.

Regards,
pf


 Comment Written 29-Aug-2017



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2017
    What a heartfelt, wonderful review, so sad about your friend, sadly he wasn't the only one.
    ,Thank you the suggestion it has a nice ring and is certainly worth considering......thank you so much for the kind words and fantastic rating.
    Mitchell
Comment by
Irish Rain
Level 4 Pro
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  60
Review Stars
  Rank:  269
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Just beautiful. My father did three tours. After the third, he rarely laughed again. He received the Purple Heart for stepping on a booby-trap, where the wooden spear was driven up his leg. I think you accurately describe the mindset, the pathos, the return to an unappreciative nation. Wonderful write, blessings....


 Comment Written 28-Aug-2017



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2017
    It's with reviews like this that you can gauge if you have done justice to these brave men with your words.
    This has really touched me IR, thank you so much for your heartfelt words and humbling rating.
    Mitchell

reply by Irish Rain on 29-Aug-2017
    You nailed this one!!
Comment by
Boogienights
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  90
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  128
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This is a well written and very powerful poem about the effects of war, as seen through the eyes of a participant. Full of great imagery, it's not hard to picture what these soldiers went through during and after the war. I liked this very much. Thanks for sharing this.


 Comment Written 28-Aug-2017



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2017
    Thank you so much
    Mitchell

reply by Boogienights on 29-Aug-2017
Comment by
Gypsy Blue Rose
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Hello, Mitchell,

I love this free verse about Vietnam Veterans and how unjustly they were treated when the return from the war. The poem is full of emotion and wonderful imagery. Well done my friend.


 Comment Written 28-Aug-2017



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2017
    Thank you so much Gypsy for your lovely review.
    Mitchell
Comment by
frogbook
 
Review Stars
 
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
As always, the poetry is fabulous and it speaks of something very important as this was, indeed the only war where soldiers were treated so poorly when they returned. I just heard there is a full-length documentary coming out as a mini series on PBS about this and other aspects of the war. Now back to the poem itself, powerfully written with the wonderful, yet very disturbing words. The 4th stanza is particularly haunting. The 1st line of the poem was the truth of so many and the ending stanza was excellent also. "Like dust settling on a sheet in a haunted house"-how very inventive this line is.


 Comment Written 28-Aug-2017



reply by the author on 29-Aug-2017
    Thank you so much FB for such a wonderful review
    Mitchell
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