Football Chapter 12 part 2
Katherine finds out who's been watching her.
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Reviews from
Labor Day


A Re-Definition

  37 total reviews 
Comment by
RGstar
Level 1 Pro
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  Rank:  151
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
What I mean is, apart from understanding the absence, as I have also been absent and just easing back, mainly motivation and the endeavours of what was seen around me. Yet, here I am reviewing, what I would call, a summary...and a darn good one too.

Not only would it have been impossible for a good many authors to have written one this long, yet keep the poise and composure as if writing a chapter of a book that would keep all enthralled and in touch of what had been written before, I t would have had many crying out for time. Not this one.

There is a natural aura that surrounds writers that have the gift of writing, and it cannot be taught, only perfected...which actually could never reach perfection...as it would just keep getting better with time.

This sets good writers apart.

Descriptive, fulfilling, catched phrases, imagery, suspense, as well, a warmth explained within the family, "time for waling the dog" or not. Explained much of personal within a family structure without trying to....and I like that. Things just fall into place.

The! Near the end....something that caught the eye:

"I'd planted English lavender, and four fruit bushes against the back fence and climbing jasmine, spaced three-feet apart against the east wall. " Poetic excellence, in terms of imagery...not too sweet for the piece, but imagery and thought process to the fore.

So, on an entertainment level, I give this ten, and writing not far off.

My six stars for sure. Welcome back friend. Hope this review helps to vitalize the engine, for it is an asset to the site.

Thoroughly enjoyed.

My best wishes.
RGstar


 Comment Written 11-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 11-Sep-2017
    Your review left me breathless, RG. Thank you so much, my dear friend. I wish I could give you the most deserved thumbs up, but I guarantee you will get it as soon as my supply is replenished. I know it doesn't mean that much to you, but it does to me. Again, thank you, and God Bless.

    Jay

reply by RGstar on 11-Sep-2017
    Safe journey, you and family for the rest of time allocated, my friend.
Comment by
Walu Feral
 
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G'day Jay.

Ah, mate, that explains why you haven't been around... phew! What a relief. I said to Delia just the other day that I hoped I haven't done anything to upset you. Wow, what a relief.

A great yarn, here, Sir. As always, it's written spag free and in the entertaining style that only you can produce.

Good luck with the gardens and I hope the weather hasn't affected you too much.

Cheers Fez


 Comment Written 11-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 11-Sep-2017
    I could have sworn you were one of my regulars I explained my absence to individually. You could never do anything to upset me. You can do something to make me very happy, though: you can follow my blog. I mentioned it almost as a joke in my post, but really, it means a great deal to me. Not an ego thing, but a practicality. The more followers I get, the closer to the top of Googles Search Engine for blogs and bloggers. Thanks, Fez, for your usual kindness. I should be back end of month.

reply by Walu Feral on 11-Sep-2017
    No probs, mate.

    I actually meant to tell you that I followed your blog. I got the email and clicked the link. I hope it went through okay. It'll be good to keep up with you.

reply by the author on 11-Sep-2017
    Ah, bless you, my dear friend. Tell Delia I said "hi".

    Jay

reply by Walu Feral on 11-Sep-2017
    Will do, Sir. She says "Kumusta" (Hi)

reply by the author on 11-Sep-2017
    Funny, my friend ... I went back to my blog site to look and didn't find anything, except some guy, Rick Thwaites Poetry, but before I left that screen I clicked on it and immediately remembered in your posts that your given name was Rick. Of course your picture and Delia's gave it away. Thanks, again, for following me.

reply by Walu Feral on 11-Sep-2017
    lol. Welcome, mate. I should get your posts in my email now.

    Is there a way to change the address on "Rick Thwaites Poetry" to "Walu Feral Poetry and Yarns"? That you know of or do I have to create another site?

reply by the author on 11-Sep-2017
    If it's about Wordpress blog and websites I have a passing chance of knowing. But yours isn't a website is it? It's an email address. Do you realize how easy it would be to set up a Wordpress Blog? And it's absolutely free, unless you want to pay for additional perks. Let me know if you want a hand.

reply by Walu Feral on 11-Sep-2017
    Thanks Jay.

    I thought it was a blog lol. I set it up a couple of years ago. I'll get this book finished (Editing) send it off and then deal with the blog. I think it's time to be more public, and cross a few fingers lol.

reply by the author on 12-Sep-2017
    Absolutely, but you need to get a strong presence on social media BEFORE your book publishes. As far as a blog goes, you have a natural magnetic pull with your story. I guarantee you'll have droves pulled into your story. Something to consider, anyway.
Comment by
flylikeaneagle
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flylikeaneagle - Nancy Ann Gee
 
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Hi Jay: I understand that you value your time and roses. I had 65
rose bushes of which 24 were tea roses in my Dallas garden.

Somehow, when the tree branches are on your grass, you must cut
them up. Chores are never done. Glad you got some fresh air.

I've been taking on line, university classes. One is in poetry with
Wordsworth. The other class is writing style in prose. Yes, I'm
inspired to write better. One assignment was writing in second
person of you.

Enjoy your family time. God bless. Be safe outdoors with your saw.
flylikeaneagle - nancy


 Comment Written 10-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 10-Sep-2017
    Thank you, Nancy. I so admire your discipline. Good for you taking writing courses on line. I'm happy you enjoyed this. Would you do me a favor and follow my blog? It would really help me have a presence in with Google's search engine. That means a lot.

    God Bless you, Nancy. Your drive is inspiring.
Comment by
2019 Short Works Writer of the Year
Ideasaregems-Dawn
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  Rank:  263
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Each and every thing I read of yours amazes me (and sometimes has me clamoring for understanding - not because your writing lacks clarity, but because your knowledge/wit/wisdom exceeds mine...*sigh*...). You dazzle me too much, my friend, and yet, like a junkie's need for the next fix, I find myself returning time and again to satiate my need for self-punishment ( and learning - lol).


 Comment Written 10-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 10-Sep-2017
    Whoa! Whoa! and double-whoa! If you lived near me, I'd buy you a drink for your extravagant praise. No, that's a dinner compliment!

reply by Ideasaregems-Dawn on 10-Sep-2017
    :)))))) You are most welcome.
Comment by
2019 Script Writer of the Year
Bill Schott
 
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  Rank:  23
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  Rank:  4
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  Rank:  20
 

#4 Ranked Script Writer
Excellent
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This is quite a look-inside of the daily routine and intervening dilemmas of the methodical and purpose-filled life of Jay "Septuagenarian" Squires. A lot of personal information, family ties, and idiosyncrasies brought to light. The idea of 111 degree weather in September makes we think of miserable times in Somalia, Haiti, Saudi Arabia, and other hot places. Here in Michigan we say good-bye to hot days in August. Hot, of course, being a relative term. Laughable, really, compared to California. I'll pop those two addresses into my computer and see what you have there. Nice to see you back on the grid, even if it's only to say why you're not. Happy day.


 Comment Written 10-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 10-Sep-2017
    You're funny, Bill. "Nice to see you back on the grid, even if it's only to say why you're not." LOL, it was always in my plan to enter contests during the month of September, which ,of course, means means answering reviews. Simply put, I would not review others' posts. I made a few exceptions there by writers asking me to review a particular piece. I have spent an incredible amount of time on my blogs. (There is so much going on behind the scenes.) Now that I feel it is a decent-appearing site, I'm like a new parent. This is why you'd be honoring me by visiting, and I hope, following it. All that would happen is you'd be receiving notification when I post. If it ever became a burden, all you need to do is unfollow. I hope to see you there.
Comment by
Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
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Man, I dig how you think, Jay! Millet porridge, blueberries mmm ...
My blueberry bush is about 2 feet high but full of flowers. I live in the subtropics and the climate is too hot for normal blueberries but these are a tropical miniature which seems to be struggling but doing okay. I think the struggling is down to our care or lack of and probably a lack of water. Yep, you do talk too much, but hey, no one is forcing us. I did the best with my left hand to capture that website and I'd like to follow you if I can manage it. Wait and see, no promises, summer cometh. Giddy


 Comment Written 10-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 10-Sep-2017
    Thank you so much, Giddy. Funny, my blueberry bush is one of my babies I was so worried about. It only stands about two feet tall, with three stems. A lotta leaves though. You're the only person to mention the millet. I love it, but it's not very popular in the US. Rather bland by itself, but I add nuts, blueberries, cinnamon, nutmeg, maple extract, then top it with Almond milk and Xylotol (sugar, made from Stevia leaves).

    Oh, I hope you find the time and energy to follow my blog. There's a button on the right side and one at the bottom of the screen. As I've told others, the only thing that happens when you follow is that you get notified whenever I make write a post. If it gets too much of a burden, you can always unfollow. It means a lot to my presence on Google. The more followers, the higher I am toward page 1 on the Google search engines. If someone writes "Blog" on Google, I'd love to have my blog on the first page (or screen).

    Either way, Giddy, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR YOUR FRIENDSHIP AND SUPPORT THROUGH THE YEARS.

    Jay

reply by Giddy Nielsen-Sweep on 11-Sep-2017
    It's been all my pleasure to read your writing, Jay. Would you do me a big favour and send me the web address for your blog again please, 'cause I lost it!. I'll do my best to hang onto it this time, I promise. Thanks, mate. G

reply by the author on 11-Sep-2017
    Ha, thank you Giddy. Don't forget you'll have to paste it to your browser, though. Here it is: https://septuagenarianjourney.com/. Again, thanks, Giddy.
Comment by
Jannypan (Jan)
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#2 Ranked Poet
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Jay,

I enjoyed your story. It had great imagery & the topic was well expressed. Good job with the chronology, too.

Two and a half years ago a 45 year old 45 foot tree as big around as a round dining table for 6 fell in my backyard due to a sever ice storm. Needless to say, it took out all the wires--no electricity for 2 weeks. Crews all over town were busy & the limbs had to be moved before they could get in the yard. We had a week & a half of 17-27 degrees. It was really a difficult time--couldn't leave because of the animals.

Thanks for sharing. Jan


 Comment Written 09-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 10-Sep-2017
    Oh, that's horrible, Jan. I should count my blessings. But this is California, after all. I hope you had a chance to stop by and follow my blog. I think you'd enjoy it.
Comment by
mfowler
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Hi Jay
Great to read this slice of life so cleverly logged in this personal anecdote from your life. A storm was going to hit; the weather girl said so, but as your dryly observed, earthquakes hold more fear for Californians than storms and random chaos. Even the destruction of your son's garden didn't seem to phase you, but the reality of the aftermath in your yard brings you immediately to action. The rounding off of your story brings you back to the philosophical where you distinguish between the actions of real life and the more intellectual beauty of cerebral creativity. Yeah, some of our best ideas for writing are born/borne on the feet as soon as they hit the ground. Your ability to describe discreet interactions, internal reflections and actual events is shown again in this piece. Clever word choices, allusions to what at first seem less connected thoughts (but which later show their purpose), and your almost camera like descriptions of scenes, make this a wonderful read. I hope you enjoy time away.
Mark


 Comment Written 09-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 10-Sep-2017
    Oh, Mark, I'm so happy to hear from you, and your usual cogent reviews. You have an ability to focus your understanding and explanation on areas that I only vaguely grasp as I write it. You are my interpreter in that respect. I wish I had a thumbs up to award you. Next best thing, I'll put your name on the list for Oct. 1st.

    I've been worried about you. What is the latest news.

    By the way, have you had a chance to take a look at my blog. I'm kind of proud of it. A lot of recycled Fan Story posts on it, but some new stuff as well. Take a look at it if you have the time. On the right side and on the bottom are the follow buttons. All it means is that you'd get an email notification when I post something. If it gets unwieldy, all you have to do is unfollow. It would really help me with the Google search engines.

    Jay

reply by mfowler on 10-Sep-2017
    Thanks, mate. I appreciate your response greatly.
    I'm ok, just very weak. I'll look at your log and see what I can do.
    Regards
    Mark
Comment by
2018 Novelist of the Year.
2017 Short Works and 2017 Script Writer of the Year.
Thomas Bowling
Premier Author
 
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It's great to read about your home life. It sounds like you have a wonderful family with great names and enough love to go around. Only you could make a rainy day sound like an adventure.


 Comment Written 09-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 10-Sep-2017
    I am blessed, Thomas. My whole life has been blessed. Thank you for your kind words. By the way, I hope you have a chance to stop by and follow my blog. No biggy. You just get notified when I post something new. and if it gets burdensome, you can always unfollow. It means a lot to me though, because it raises my placement in the search engines for Google and others. I'd love to have my name come up on the first page whenever someone googles "blogs".
Comment by
F. Wehr3
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Nice story, Jay! I enjoyed your humor, building of what I already know of you and then adding in a little detail here and there. Best laid plans sometimes don't pan out, but hopefully you got some of those creative juices flowing not being on the computer.

Enjoy your vacation,
Russell


 Comment Written 09-Sep-2017



reply by the author on 09-Sep-2017
    Thank you ... and for understanding about the vacation. I'll have a lot of make up when I return. I appreciate the six stars. It would mean a lot to me, Russell, if you'd take a moment and visit my blog. I really could use some followers. It doesn't commit you to anything; you are just notified when I write a new post. Later, if it bogs you down too much, you can unsubscribe. Thanks, my friend.

    Jay

reply by F. Wehr3 on 09-Sep-2017
    Your welcome! I have it on my to do list, but the list is rather long at the moment, lol. Don't worry, I will.

reply by the author on 10-Sep-2017
    Thanks, Russell. I understand "to do's"!
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