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Reviews from
In Lonely Weather


a spiritual poem

  21 total reviews 
Comment by
PoemsOfDD
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  Rank:  153
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  Rank:  57
 
Exceptional
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Irish Rain, this is an excellent Villanelle poem. I have to confess to never having written one before but this is an inspiring read. It flows beautifully and unfolds to relay a spiritual message of faith. I especially love the fifth stanza and "My time has silvered as I pray" - what can I say but so worthy of a six shower. ~DD


 Comment Written 26-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 26-Apr-2018
    Oh wow! Thank you!! I so appreciate this!!
Comment by
estory
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north carolina
 
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  Rank:  145
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  Rank:  51
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  Rank:  105
 
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I really liked this. The perserverance comes through, in soft, determined repetitions of "I've never lived a loveless day." nice touches with the alliterations. The grey colors of the day actually soften this and smooth it out. "My time has silvered as I pray." liked that original image there, silvered time, it really works well. colorful and descriptive. estory


 Comment Written 25-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 25-Apr-2018
    Thank you so much Estory!!!
Comment by
l.raven
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Hi Judy, just believe and have faith....and God will show us the way home...there are times when we feel lonely...but if we really think about it...we are never alone...I love your poem sweet girl...and the perfect picture...very nicely written angel...love you much...Linda xxoo


 Comment Written 24-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 25-Apr-2018
    Thank you so much Miss Linda!!

reply by l.raven on 25-Apr-2018
    your so welcome sweet girl...xxoo love you
Comment by
apky
 
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Thank you, Irish Rain, for these inspiring lines in you lovely poem:

My time has silvered as I pray,

I now perceive His artistry...

in lonely weather, shades of grey.


He is my path. Now, come what may,

I'm not alone. I'll never be.


 Comment Written 24-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
    Thank you so much Apky!!
Comment by
rama devi
 
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 Rank:  209
 
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Beautiful! Inspiring! Well crafted. Good form and fine presentation.

Favorite lines:


that though I've owned catastrophe...

I've never lived a loveless day.


A suggestion:


My soul was lost,(;) still I can say,


*optional suggestion:

I was so foolish. Now(,) when they



Another suggestion for sculpting flow and cadence and grammar:

My time has silvered as I pray,(; or .)

I now perceive His artistry... LOVE THIS LINE


The repeating line has superb flow and consonance of L:

I've never lived a loveless day...


Nice quote in your notes...

Love,
rd


 Comment Written 24-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
    Thank you so much Miss Rama!! Made all the corrections...most appreciated!!

reply by rama devi on 24-Apr-2018
    :-))))
Comment by
sunnilicious
 
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  Rank:  556
 
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Hi! I ran out of 6ers and this is so deserving. Enjoyable poem to read. Nice lyrical flow. Great repeat line. Every day should be loving for everybody especially on a bad day. You're simply creative and beautiful. Lovely work :)


 Comment Written 24-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
    You're so sweet Miss Alicia! Thank you so much!!
Comment by
Jesse James Doty
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  Rank:  160
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  Rank:  46
 
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This is a very well written Villanelle. You obviously put your effort and heart into this poem and it shows. I like the returning phrase, "I've never lived a loveless day..." used in every other stanza, as well as the first stanza. I like how you use the metaphor of weather to represent lonely shades of grey. That has a repetitive use, that empasizes the subject, you feel strongly about. The artwork, by Snapdragon, is lovely. It fits very well with the subject of grey weather. I am happy for you that you feel this way. I wish I could say more, but I'll leave it this way.
Take care, Jesse


 Comment Written 24-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
    Thank you again Mr. Jesse!!! Greatly appreciated!!

reply by Jesse James Doty on 24-Apr-2018
    You're very welcome.
Comment by
Sandra du Plessis
 
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A very well-written Vilanelle. We can always be grateful for what we have in life because we have a living God whgo sees everything we do and when we struggle He is ready to reach out with a helping hand.


 Comment Written 24-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
    Thank you so much Miss Sandra!!
Comment by
damommy
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  11
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  Rank:  14
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Review Stars
  Rank:  26
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
The presentation made me think this would be lonely and sad. Instead, you turned into a beautiful testament of your faith. I love the Villanelle, and you did an excellent job with it. Your repeated lines fit in so smoothly they didn't seem repeating at all.


 Comment Written 24-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
    This is so appreciated, thank you Miss Yvonne!!
Comment by
nancy_e_davis
Level 1 Pro
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Poet Rating
  Rank:  74
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  Rank:  76
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Review Stars
  
 Rank:  71
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Judy, this is a lovely spiritual rendering of your faith. I don't think I have ever tried a Villanelle. I wish you had put the instructions in your notes. That is always helpful to a reviewer. The message is sincere and uplifting. Well done! Nancy


 Comment Written 24-Apr-2018



reply by the author on 24-Apr-2018
    I love your review, thank you so much Miss Nancy!!
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