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Reviews from
The Swamp Octopus


.... a humorous children's story .....

  6 total reviews 
Comment by
country ranch writer
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  Rank:  214
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  Rank:  56
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  Rank:  111
 
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Well who new the octopus could be so much fun shame the old man didn't see your point of view. Meal and mild he is wanting to play with you for fun and etc.


 Comment Written 14-Feb-2019



reply by the author on 15-Feb-2019
    Thanks for your great comments.

reply by country ranch writer on 15-Feb-2019
    smiles
Comment by
2019 Poet of the Year
Dolly'sPoems
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He he he, Richard you made me smile and this is an inventive write and I can't imagine playing with an octopus, but now I know how it is played, I loved all those noises and I was watching from the water's edge and it looked quite brutal to me! Love Dolly x


 Comment Written 14-Feb-2019



reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
    No, it's a friendly octopus!
    Most of the time.
Comment by
Joanna S. Blue
 
Review Stars
 
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
This story is so engaging and enchanting, with the situation of walking by a secluded pond and something strange gradually emerging and all the surprising
events that occur after that, and then how the creature just is gone. I love the part where things change--perhaps--You're not winning/But you're not losing/As
expected. I love the increasingly playful, increasingly exciting, and increasingly
creative language--as if words have to be invented to describe what is happening.
The idea that something is there, then not there, that you have a secret all your
own is so appealing to children.


 Comment Written 14-Feb-2019



reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
    .
    Hi Joanna,

    Thanks for your comments.

    I'll have to doodle another short story!

    Thanks for your inspiration,

    Richard.
    .
Comment by
Debra White
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Richard,
This is fun :)
I love all the descriptive, action words like 'Spinny, Whizzy, Whooo!' and 'Zipperty Zoomtatty Zoom!'
The kids in the class I work in (age 5,6 & 7) would adore this story - they would be in fits!
I have to ask (just so I know for sure!) WHO is gone at the end? The Octopus, or the grumpy old man?! The latter, I hope!
Best wishes, Debs :)


 Comment Written 14-Feb-2019



reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
    Debs,

    Yeah it's the grumpy old man!

    Ha ha ha!

    Met a young man once who taught French to year 7s.

    He told them he had a pet rabbit.

    Guess what?

    They were only interested in his pet rabbit!


    Do you read the children stories?

    Thanks,

    Richard.

reply by Debra White on 14-Feb-2019
    LOL about the French teacher and his rabbit!
    Yep, always reading stories to the children - to mine and to the ones at school too... Sometimes I make it up as I go along :)

reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
    Debs,

    Please read them my Swamp Octopus and see what their critique is!

    Thanks,

    Richard.

reply by Debra White on 14-Feb-2019
    Ok ;)

reply by Debra White on 14-Feb-2019
    Katie (11yr and still not in bed!) just came and read it.... her verdict: Wow, I wish I was the one being thrown about by the octopus, it sounds so much fun and the words made me kind of feel it.
    A hit, I would say :)
    Will try it out on 8yr old Rebecca tomorrow and let you know :)

reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
    Glad Katie like it.

    My Rebecca is 39!
    May is the big day.

reply by Debra White on 14-Feb-2019
    Party!
Comment by
Pam (respa)
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  Rank:  16
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  Rank:  31
 
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-Nice photo and presentation, Richard.
-Notes are appreciated.
-I like your children's story.
-The sounds of the words and
the child's experience with the
octopus will appeal them.
-I can picture children listening
to this being read, and commenting
about what is going on.
-They will especially like the
idea that the octopus wants to play.
-The description of the old man
is good, he comes along and
puts a damper on the experience,
and then...
-Thanks for sharing.




 Comment Written 14-Feb-2019



reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
    Thanks for your fab comments.

reply by Pam (respa) on 14-Feb-2019
    You are welcome, Richard.
Comment by
patcelaw
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  Rank:  25 (+1)
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  Rank:  37
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  Rank:  76
 
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Richard, this would be a lovely little story book for little boys I think. Maybe some little girls would like it too. There is lots of action scenes and was a fun read. Patricia


 Comment Written 14-Feb-2019



reply by the author on 14-Feb-2019
    Writing is fun!
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