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Heads Will Roll


A story of mutilation. 150 words

  37 total reviews 
Comment by
Debbie Pope
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  Rank:  48
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  Rank:  49
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  Rank:  98
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Lordy, Lee. Can you get any better? I show your stuff to my friends who are not Fan Story members. With your talent, you make me feel like I am part of something big.
Not only did you take me on a fool's journey, but I enjoyed the ride so much. I loved your "slap-thwack of impact" and your "sacrificial oaken block." I should have thought chef with your starched white smock. It did give me pause. I stopped and thought what man wears a smock. Then I got too involved with the action.
Thank you for this delightful story.


 Comment Written 26-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 03-Mar-2019
    Thank you, Debbie. You're too kind. I'm glad the white smock didn't give it away. You never know what might tip a reader off.
    Anyway, thanks again. I appreciate all your kind words. Peace, Lee
Comment by
meeshu
 
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some tasty Cannibal Cole-Slaw. gives new meaning to cabbage head. Viva le Vinaigrette! an excellent write, Lee. keeps the reader's attention............meeshu


 Comment Written 25-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 02-Mar-2019
    Thanks so much, meeshu. Never thought I'd write a recipe for coleslaw. Glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee

reply by meeshu on 02-Mar-2019
    hold the mayo.
Comment by
robyn corum
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  Rank:  20
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  Rank:  26
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  Rank:  47
 
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Lee,

Unfortunately, this was posted too close to the psychic, and I was ahead of you, expecting the surprise. *smile* My mind was whirling ahead of the game - what 'heads' could it be? Got there first. Still great writing!


 Comment Written 25-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2019
    Thank you, Robyn. Yeah, I might have dipped my beak in the Flash well once to often, but as stand-alone pieces, they hold up--I think. The truth is, every time something is labeled Flash, I know someone's trying to pull the wool over my eyes. Flash is all about misdirection. Yeah, 'heads' was a giveaway. I thought 'severed heads', while truthful, implied something else.
    Nice catch. Peace, Lee
Comment by
LIJ Red
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I make slaw one serving at a time...the crap does not "keep", not for me...I found a gadget that makes it my way...an ulu. Where was I...oh, excellent 150 word flash, Lee.


 Comment Written 25-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2019
    Ulu? Remind me, were you stationed at Attu or Adak?

    Me, I like to let my slaw steep for a day or two. But I also like nibble on plain raw cabbage. Just a matter of taste.

    Glad you enjoyed, Red. I always find reviews to be entertaining, and instructive. I'm going to invest in an ulu.

    Peace, Lee


reply by LIJ Red on 25-Feb-2019
    Adak, but miles from the big air station, at the Security Group base on the northeast horn of the island...
Comment by
Pantygynt
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  Rank:  79
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  Rank:  27
 

#4 Ranked Novelist
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One's revulsion turns to amusement when one realise that cabbages have heads much like us. In fact I know one or two people whose brains actually resemble those of the cabbage in the very finest detail. Good luck in this contest. You deserve some success with this.


 Comment Written 25-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2019
    Thanks, Jim. I couldn't avoid the revulsion factor if I wanted to pull this one off. Yes, I know some cabbage craniums myself.
    Sad to say, but I suspect a couple reviewers thought 'he' was making coleslaw from human heads. Glad the revulvion turned to amusement. Thanks again. Peace, Lee
Comment by
LovnPeace
Smile
Even when it rains !
 
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Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
LOL you didn't fool me though I bet you did many, I almost bit at first but, remembered who I was reading. A funny soul anf not a mean bone to be found. Good luck in the contest, Blessings, Barbara


 Comment Written 24-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2019
    Thank you, Barbara. You've got me pegged. I actually cringed while writing the beginning. Many were fooled, but others, like you, saw right through me. So glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
Comment by
Cindy Warren
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  Rank:  24
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  Rank:  143
 
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Oh, they were heads of cabbage! That took me a minute. It's been a long day. Haha, I might want to consider that, especially at this time of year when there are no weeds in the garden for me to pick on. And who doesn't like coleslaw? Good luck in the contest. I think you may have a winner here.


 Comment Written 24-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2019
    Thank you, Cindy. Actually, I was preparing coleslaw when the idea for this story hit me. Funny how ideas are everywhere.
    Next time, try adding a small handful of lightly toasted caraway seeds to your slaw. Glad you enjoyed. Peace, Lee
Comment by
Brigitte Elko
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Creepy! whenever I open one of your posts, I don't know what to expect. Well, I didn't see this coming. Well written though scary. I will never look at coleslaw the same way again.

Many blessings,
Brigitte


 Comment Written 24-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2019
    Thank you, Brigitte. I fear I've done coleslaw a great disservice. Glad you enjoyed . . . sorta. Peace, Lee
Comment by
His Grayness
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Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Here we have another outstandingly shocking, imaginative gift of wonder, fear, urgency for clarity and impatience for answers from this wonderous master of shock! so now we must stand in waiting to learn more and hope we can live with it! HIS GRAYNESS; Vance


 Comment Written 24-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2019
    Thanks so much, Vance. Actually I was preparing cabbages when the idea for this story hit me.
    Overall, the story is a bit gruesome for my taste--until you get to the coleslaw. Thanks so much for the stellar review.
    Peace, Lee

reply by His Grayness on 25-Feb-2019
    my delight as always LEE, THANKS VANCE
Comment by
Mark Valentine
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  Rank:  145
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  Rank:  17
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  Rank:  247
 
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The "sacrificial oaken block" is where I caught on - nice touch. I think the reader unfamiliar with your oeuvre may stay in the dark even as you add in the lemon juice - that will have some heads scratching. Love the ending - they don't get much more concise and revelatory than that.

Another contest win in the offing? Good luck.


 Comment Written 24-Feb-2019


reply by the author on 25-Feb-2019
    Ah, you got me! I fear I've dipped my beak into the Flash well once too often lately. I'm becoming predictable. Still, I'm happy you didn't catch on 'til sacrificial oaken block'.

    Thank you, Mark. You saw me coming this time. I really enjoy writing these shorties. Each word has to be considered. I thought 'sacrificial' might cloud 'oaken block'.

    I think I need to change my MO.

    Thanks again, my friend.

    Peace, Lee
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