Just looking around and came across this story. Have read it three times. Think the story line is quite good but the telling a ragged. It might be that my muse is more U.S, English oriented.
The notes to this story seem very much like an apology. If one has to tell the reader what he is reading, then the telling of the story need some work.
The photo does adds very little to the story ... does not pull the reader in.
In your posting, you explain what and how the story came to be. Do your readers need to know all that you posted? I think you have a good story, one that will pull the reader in.
The opening lines of the story gives the reader a lot of information that is slow and does not pull the reader in.
Suppose I do not know Angus, then what?
Maybe. Angus my next door neighbor was eaten by a crocodile.
Think this is a good story that needs some rewrite.
Good to be reading you again. I've missed you!
I really enjoyed this story. It's very well written and your narrators voice is really engaging. Great content and I see nothing obvious to edit. Thanks for entertaining me :)
Best wishes, Debra