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Reviews from
Please Come Back Home


Done in Hank William style

  41 total reviews 
Comment by
Rachelle Allen
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What a heart-wrenching write, Jaybird 1. Your rhymes and meters were excellent, and the words you chose were eloquent in their simplicity. Beautiful job here. xo


 Comment Written 04-Jun-2019


Comment by
rhonnie69
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  Rank:  72 (+3)
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  Rank:  459
 
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HELLO JAYBIRS1: I can relate to what you are saying here because I find myself on the same boat with you. Someone left me like that too. I've been dealing with it for years. But I refuse to let it make me who I am today. I can't control what happened in the past. But I can control what happens in the present and the future. I can control my emotions concerning the matter. That's what I'm living for today. God Bless you, Jaybird1.


 Comment Written 04-Jun-2019


Comment by
mvbrooks
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I could see this as a country song so I'd say you did emulate Hank Williams' style and it becomes a positive tribute to him. As I read it, I thought, this only shows one side of the story. Would be interesting to read why she left.



 Comment Written 03-Jun-2019


Comment by
2019 Novelist of the Year
Ulla
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  Rank:  44
 

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Hi Jaybird, this is a wonderfully written poem. It's so very sad, though. His not only lost his love but his son as well. It is as if there's a glimmer of hope at the very end, but I don't think it will happen somehow. I liked your poem a lot. Very expressive. All the best. Ulla:))


 Comment Written 03-Jun-2019


Comment by
Aussie
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Kace
 
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  Rank:  92 (+7)
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  Rank:  59
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  Rank:  133
 
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Losing your family is a knife in the heart. Even if it is fictional, too much of the breaking of families occurs everyday. Well written, sad and ugly for the one left behind.


 Comment Written 03-Jun-2019


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Can't go to wrong trying to copy Hank Williams. I can empathize with this narrator, since my wife left me, too. After 18 years together. I didn't want to get divorced. Once a man's family is broken up, he never feels the same. He feels empty and as though he failed somehow.


 Comment Written 02-Jun-2019


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Diana L Crawford
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Your poem is simple yet so full of emotion. The heartache being experienced is touching. This poems rhymes well and flows nicely. I'm routing for love winning againš?„°


 Comment Written 02-Jun-2019


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godlucifer
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your writing was extraordinary put together. you used simple words and it was created with creativity. your poem was a talented write. thanks for the read. "your so vein" means mood or humor.

your so vein
godlucifer


 Comment Written 02-Jun-2019


Comment by
Janice Canerdy
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  Rank:  28 (+1)
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  Rank:  16
 
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This ultra-concise poem is powerful in its expression of loneliness, grief
and helplessness to correct a life-affecting situation. The speaker aches for what might have been.


 Comment Written 02-Jun-2019


Comment by
Boogienights
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This would make a great song! Lamenting lost love is a staple of a great country song, i could hear the music in my head. I loved this, thanks for sharing.


 Comment Written 02-Jun-2019


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