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Success In Life


We all search for it-sonnet

  72 total reviews 
Comment by
Joy Graham
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Hello jaybird,

This poem is great for a pep talk. Just what I need to hear today as only you can say it in your own unique style.

- "Let peace and joy attend your (ever) need," - should that be, "every"?

Joy xx


 Comment Written 14-Sep-2019

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Sharon Haiste
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This lovely little verse has an excellent message. Too many of us loose sight of the real prize.
Chasing the dollar is time consuming and exhausting. Stopping to smell the flowers and enjoy the day, is relaxing and fulfilling.
We just forget it sometimes.
Well written, well rhymed, well done.
Sharon


 Comment Written 14-Sep-2019

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Pantygynt
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The content and overall form of this is similar to the idea of a sonnet but it doesn't fit neatly into any of the established sonnet forms being written entirely in rhyming couplets rather than the alternating rhyme or other scheme more usually associated with the form. The kyrielle sonnet is written in rhyming couplets but that boasts a repeating refrain line and a non-rhyming couplet to conclude.

It is well stated but I am not sure into which cubbyhole it fits best.


 Comment Written 14-Sep-2019

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robyn corum
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JB,

A beautiful sonnet with an important message we would all do well to pay better attention to. We get so caught up in the rush and glory of this life, in the more, more, better, better, frantic pace and forget that's not our purpose here.

A nice post, friend and great reminder. Just one small suggestion:
--> Let peace and joy attend your (ev'ry) need,

Thanks!



 Comment Written 14-Sep-2019

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Sanku
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yes it is only our good deeds that can leave "footprints in the sands of time".The money is often useless and fame sometimes misbehaves.
It is a good motivational poem.The form is ideal to the theme .you have adhered to all rules regarding a sonnet.


 Comment Written 14-Sep-2019

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JanPerry
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Its always hard to define success. Is it money or game; friends and family??
I always think balance is the way to go. Are we encouraged to seek balance? No we are not. Society is fixated on money and success so don't blame us for trying to keep up!!


 Comment Written 14-Sep-2019

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Alcreator Litt Dear
 
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We all search for success in life, but joy and peace is the real success, as success in life depends on how one lives, what one does and how one gives to others, and harmony one shares, for all will go with death; well said, well done.


 Comment Written 14-Sep-2019

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lyenochka
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Wonderful message, JayBird! So good to see you here again. And yes, the only way to live blessed in life is to be in God's peace and joy and avoid the world's wrong value system.


 Comment Written 13-Sep-2019

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Lulube
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This work has reached the exceptional level
Great imagery, simply stated for your words of wisdom, that all should read and be reminded of oneselves stat us. Some just don't care who or what they hurt to get what and where they want to be. A great wake-up for some. thanks for sharing

lulube


 Comment Written 13-Sep-2019

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Lobber
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Well, a truly inspirational work... oh, that we all could rise to the standard you want us to aspire to... money does not equal eternal success... thank you for your wise words- Lobber


 Comment Written 13-Sep-2019

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