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Reviews from
Pushed Too Far


Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Pay Back"

Shocking news sends Jeremy over the edge.

  12 total reviews 
Comment by
Roxanna Andrews
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Poet Rating
  Rank:  209
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  110
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  Rank:  57
Review Stars
  Rank:  94
 
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I don't mind the violence. As long as it's not body parts being cut off and guts and brain spilling out. =} Though that is what these guys deserve. I'm glad he is standing up for himself. Well done. Looking forward to the next.


 Comment Written 11-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 11-Oct-2019
    Thank you so much for reading my chapter. I agree brain splattering would be a bit much. Poor Jeremy is finding himself at a dilemma today. He has his enemy in the trunk and doesn't know what to do.
    Thank you again for all your help, support and friendship. It always means the world to me, take care.
Comment by
Iza Deleanu
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  Rank:  102
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  Rank:  10
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  Rank:  10
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  Rank:  13
 

#10 Ranked Author

#10 Ranked Novelist
Excellent
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I don't think is too violent:) is a normal response when you are mistreated for too long and let's not forget the nature helped too. Look at Paul that is almost killed by the wild boar. Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next chapter.


 Comment Written 08-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 08-Oct-2019
    Thank you very much for your lovely review. The beatdown was a long time coming, well deserved. I just hope Jeremy doesn't take it too far. He doesn't need to rot in jail, especially not for them.
    Thank you again for all your support, your encouraging words and your friendship. It always means a lot to me, take care.
Comment by
Melonie Kirchoff
 
 
Excellent
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Great writing! A lot of the chapters I've read on here lack storytelling and descriptive language but yours is great in both! I like how it is written in present tense! I don't read many books written like that and it sets yours apart. Happy Writing!


 Comment Written 07-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 07-Oct-2019
    Thank you so much for such an encouraging review. I'm glad you enjoyed it found it to be a nice change.
    Thank you again for reading my chapter it's always greatly appreciated, take care.
Comment by
Liz O'Neill
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  Rank:  309 (+2)
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  Rank:  41
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  Rank:  75
 
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This is a great image. It adds much more to the plot: "Grabbing the sizable branch beside him, he uses it for leverage to rise to his feet." Not just any writer would add that detail in. This is what makes it believable and suspenseful. There's a little bit of tongue-in-cheek humor around the truck/boar scene. Shall I guess that he will no longer want to meet the police? You draw the reader in with the mystery between Barry and Jeremy. Jeremy needed to fight to show how fed up he was. In 7th grade, I was in a fistfight most every day. In my neighborhood boys down the street would bully this boy who I now realize was mentally challenged. My friends and I would go help Bunny (born on Easter) by getting in a fight with the bullies. Well written. I'm glad you are listening to Jeremy. He needs to be finally listened to.


 Comment Written 06-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 07-Oct-2019
    Thank you so much for such a great review. I'm so glad that you enjoyed it. Thank you for letting me what you liked the best, that'll help me a lot moving forward.
    Kids can be so cruel sometimes, adults too. I guess they either don't see or care what bullying can do. If this book touches just one person, helps them see what they're doing is wrong I'll be happy.
    Thank you again for your wonderful review, all your help support and friendship. It always means a lot to me, take care.
Comment by
2019 Novelist of the Year
Ulla
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  Rank:  68
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  Rank:  178
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  Rank:  3
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  Rank:  41
 

#3 Ranked Novelist
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Hi Misty, a six it is. I think this is one of your best writing I've read so far. Yes, it's violent but I can see why and it fits in the story. Very well done, and I enjoyed the read. All best. Ulla:)))


 Comment Written 06-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 06-Oct-2019
    Wow, thank you so much for such a fantastic review. I'm thrilled that you think it deserves such high marks. I figured after all Jeremfor all he's been though he deserves a little revenge.
    Thank you again for such a marvelous review, for all your help, support and encouragement, and friendship. It means a lot to me, take care.
Comment by
Robert Zimmerman
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Poet Rating
  Rank:  43
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  Rank:  8
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  Rank:  48
 

#8 Ranked Author
Excellent
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Hello MistyDawn. I have to agree with you when you say nobody wants to be bullied by their main character. Your main character Jeremy is fighting his way through your story. I have a feeling if he loses a fight you might need to change your story line. Robert


 Comment Written 06-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 06-Oct-2019
    Thank you so much for your lovely review. Jeremy really needed the fight, to let out some of his frustration, build up his self-esteem. Hopefully, he'll be able to win Jessica's heart when this is done.
    Thank you again for your kind review, all your help, support, and friendship, it means the world to me, take care.

reply by Robert Zimmerman on 06-Oct-2019
    You're welcome :)
Comment by
scongrove
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Author Rating For Short Works
 
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  Rank:  13
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  Rank:  204
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Great chapter my friend! The beginning reeled me right into your story. Although I haven't been following your story, so sorry, I can follow this one as though I know it. Your descriptions are very detailed and give the reader exactly what's going on. I can see it all in my head as I read. The conflict with the boar is captivating. I could see everything in my head. Why did I feel a little sorry for the beast? LOL!
The struggle between Jeremy and Jeff had great action. It flowed very well. The entire chapter kept me interested. Great writing!

Sincerely,
Shana :)


 Comment Written 06-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 06-Oct-2019
    Thank you so much for such a marvelous review. I am so glad you enjoyed it that you were able to follow along, picture it in your mind. All the poor beast wanted was a little dinner. Guess he bit off more than he could chew.
    Thank you again for such a fantastic review and for your friendship. You made my week, take care.
Comment by
Cindy Warren
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Jeff had it coming. I hope Jeremy doesn't kill him, tho. There would be no coming back from that. Dump him somewhere and let him figure things out. He probably doesn't feel so tough now. Problem is, he might if he's reunited with his friends. What if the toughs have a falling out?


 Comment Written 05-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 06-Oct-2019
    Thank you so much for reading my chapter. I'm so glad you enjoyed it. Don't worry, Jeremy has a plan that doesn't involve killing, but will ensure that he'll never hurt either of them again.
    Thank you again for all your help, support, and friendship It always means a lot to me, take care.
Comment by
2014 Novelist and 2016 Short Works Writer Of The Year
Phyllis Stewart
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This is all toooo real for me, but it's very well written!

no other purpose but to breath <-- spelled breathe with an e

He recalls he and Barry's conversation <-- should be HIS and Barry's conversation


 Comment Written 05-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 05-Oct-2019
    Thank you so much for your helpful review. It's always greatly appreciated. I'm sure you've had to deal with several bullies during your teaching career. Probably more than you'd like to count.
    I thought of you when I wrote the apology, knowing how you feel about violence. I tried to keep it out, but that darn Jeremy just had to have his way.
    Thank you again for all your help, support, encouragement, and friendship. It means the world to me, take care.
    PS. It's fun to use google maps to visit different countries too. Was in Ireland a short while ago.
Comment by
royowen
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 Rank:  1
 

#1 Ranked Poet!

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Excellent
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I think the pent up rage that Jeremy feels is something that a lot of people that have been bullied feel for the adversary that has caused so much grief to their victims. This is a good episode, firstly to the rescue of Paul, (although I thought he was a dead man) beautifully written my friend, blessings, Roy


 Comment Written 05-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 05-Oct-2019
    Thank you so much for your continued support. Your reviews always mean a lot to me. Thank you for your great comment. I was hoping to portray the victim's POV, help people truly understand what leads up to the violence.
    Thank you again for all your help, your support and friendship. It always means so much to me, take care.

reply by royowen on 05-Oct-2019
    Well done
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