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Reviews from
St Louis


Viewing comments for Chapter 36 "St. Louis Chapter 15 part 2"

Can McKenzie solve Megan Nelson?s murder?

  19 total reviews 
Comment by
Ideasaregems-Dawn
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  87 (+1)
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  2
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  48
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  93
 

#2 Ranked Author
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This is excellent story-telling again, as you always do, but there is a tiny flaw (in my opinion):

"...and slightly lifted him..." I would be ruthless here and simply end the sentence at "...the front of Austin's T-shirt." The rest just doesn't seem believable.

Then the next sentence would change to Logan let Austin go (not "set Austin down").

A T-shirt would not hold the weight of the average man to have him dangle/ or need to be 'put down'.

Of course, it's your decision. It's an exceptional book overall, and these are minor 'tweaks' I'm suggesting. :))


 Comment Written 26-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 27-Oct-2019
    I have actually seen it happen, but I changed it to make sure. Thank you for the kind review.

reply by Ideasaregems-Dawn on 28-Oct-2019
    You're most welcome, my friend.
Comment by
robyn corum
Word Twister
Story Catcher
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  9
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  17
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  40
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  20
 

#9 Ranked Poet
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Barbara,

This chapter was just great. Better than most, even, and that's saying a lot. *smile* I am enjoying this relationship that's developing between these two hard headed people. It's fun and entertaining. Thanks!


 Comment Written 24-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 26-Oct-2019
    Thank you for the encouragement.
Comment by
dejohnsrld (Debbie)
Keep right on
writing on
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  52 (+1)
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  50
Author Rating For Novels
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  27
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Once inside, you go up on to bed. (go on up to bed?)

Another well written segment of this chapter. I love your stories with romance and always dogs. Take care, my friend~Debbie


 Comment Written 23-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 23-Oct-2019
    Of course at least one dog. LOL Thank you for the catch.
Comment by
tfawcus
Level 1 Pro
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  89
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  3
Review Stars
  Rank:  45
 

#3 Ranked Novelist
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
I thought this a particularly good chapter, Barbara. The drama of the shooting and McKenzie's reaction to it were both graphic and believable. It seems that she may take more notice of Logan's warnings now.


 Comment Written 22-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 22-Oct-2019
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment by
Ben Colder
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  227
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  68
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  44
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  106
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
These two are something else. So the black SUV misses the target again and hits a friend. They'll be back in a different way. Logan needs to behave, She might just blow his ear off. LOL.


 Comment Written 22-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 22-Oct-2019
    LOL Thank you for the kind review.
Comment by
Sasha
Level 1 Pro
Premier Author
Sasha
 
Poet Rating
 
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  5
Author Rating For Novels
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  
 Rank:  91
 

#5 Ranked Author
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
I want to apologize again for not folowing this book. My eyes are so bad that going to your portfolio and catching up is next to imposible. I am sure it is a great story.


 Comment Written 22-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 22-Oct-2019
    I always enjoy hearing from you no matter how often.
Comment by
Bill Pinder
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  48
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  51
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  29
 
Excellent
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Excellent chapter in your book about Logan and McKenzie. You presented the story in a believable way with a good pace to the action and the conversations. Good luck to Logan dealing with an upset and temperamental lady who is dealing with a lot in the present and her past.
Bill


 Comment Written 22-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 22-Oct-2019
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment by
the13thpoet
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  83
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  49
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Hello and a terrific Tuesday to you Barbara. Well, well, well, that was quite a chapter. I was scared there for a quick second, I thought it was going to be Logan that was shot, I'm glad that it wasn't. Mac is lucky Jose was there to protect her. Good job, can't wait for the next installment.


 Comment Written 22-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 22-Oct-2019
    I always enjoy your reviews.
Comment by
Ricky1024
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  121
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  259
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  17
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  41
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This was well written and rich in Theme and Imagery.
It read well and Flowed well with no Grammar Issues as well.
...
Adjective and Objective Contents were both Excellent and Exceptional while Descriptive Measures aligned Perfectly.
Thanks,
Doctor Ricky 1024


 Comment Written 22-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 22-Oct-2019
    Thank you for the kind review.
Comment by
Ricky1024
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  121
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  259
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  17
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  41
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This was well written and rich in Theme and Imagery.
It read well and Flowed well with no Grammar Issues as well.
...
Adjective and Objective Contents were both Excellent and Exceptional while Descriptive Measures aligned Perfectly.
Thanks,
Doctor Ricky 1024


 Comment Written 22-Oct-2019



reply by the author on 23-Oct-2019
    Thank your for the generous supportive review.

reply by Ricky1024 on 23-Oct-2019
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