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Reviews from
God is Love


2-10-2 Poem

  8 total reviews 
Comment by
__Lou__
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  Rank:  265
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  Rank:  121
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Hi there.

Firstly, the rhythm of this is kind of jarring just because of the placement of words, it doesn't flow very smoothly as it might if you had ended the second line at 'truly' (ignoring syllables for a second). Paying attention to rhythm is really important in these short poems, and you must also be mindful of pauses between sentences. Being able to find the appropriate words that also fit into the desired syllable count and manage to keep the rhythm is one of the harder things with short poems like this.

I think this is a good entry and has a good chance of placing simply because of the subject matter. I do feel you need to put a comma after 'eternal' though (love eternal, for we are...etc). Good luck in the competition!


 Comment Written 27-Nov-2019



reply by the author on 27-Nov-2019
    Thank you! I have fixed the mistake. You can check it out again. I'm happy that you enjoyed my poem!
Comment by
2018 Poet of the Year
Gloria ....
2014 - #365 Poet of the Year
2014 - #56 Author of the Year
 
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  Rank:  14
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  Rank:  21
 
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Author this is a fine entry into this contest. You have illustrated your faith in just a few syllables.

My only suggestion is to use black font lettering as your choice of colour is difficult to read.

Great job and best of luck to you in the booth. :)

Gloria


 Comment Written 27-Nov-2019



reply by the author on 27-Nov-2019
    Thank you! Thanks for the advice! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my poem!
Comment by
Sharon Haiste
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  Rank:  84
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  Rank:  31
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  Rank:  130
 
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I think this is a good entry for the 2-10-2 writing prompt.
The spiritual message is well painted in your few words.
Well done and good luck to you with the contest.
Sharon


 Comment Written 26-Nov-2019



reply by the author on 26-Nov-2019
    Thanks! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my poem!
Comment by
Y. M. Roger
FantasyGirl
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  5
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  9
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  26 (+4)
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Review Stars
  Rank:  11
 

#9 Ranked Author

#5 Ranked Poet
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A strong statement of one's faith and a well-written offering for the 2-10-2 contest... :) ;) Thank you so much for sharing and best of luck to you at the polls! ;)


 Comment Written 26-Nov-2019



reply by the author on 26-Nov-2019
    Thanks! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my poem!
Comment by
Michael McCottry Bell Jr
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I like how you wrote "his bliss" in the way the context of the poem was constructed. I wish you the best of luck in the contest and that is a wonderful image that you have chosen


Mike


 Comment Written 26-Nov-2019



reply by the author on 26-Nov-2019
    Thanks! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my poem! Thanks for the good luck wishes!
Comment by
rspoet
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  Rank:  36
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  Rank:  39 (+1)
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  Rank:  97
 
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You've written an excellent 2-10-2 poem for the contest
that many on fanstory will relate to
Excellent picture to match your words
Nicely done
Good luck in the contest
Robert


 Comment Written 26-Nov-2019



reply by the author on 26-Nov-2019
    Thanks! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my poem!
Comment by
Supe
 
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  Rank:  244
 
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Nicely done. The 10 words is a challenge I am sure, but you mastered it here. I love the picture, but the printing was a little hard for me. The colour didn't work well with my glasses. Maybe it is just me. Good luck in the contest. You did a nice job.


 Comment Written 26-Nov-2019



reply by the author on 26-Nov-2019
    Thanks! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my poem!

reply by Supe on 26-Nov-2019
    you are welcome.
Comment by
Earl Corp
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  Rank:  158
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  Rank:  47
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  Rank:  30
 
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Wow! In 14 syllables you hit three of the four criteria I use to rate poetry. It rhymed, made sense, and is spiritual. Good luck in the contest.


 Comment Written 26-Nov-2019



reply by the author on 26-Nov-2019
    Thanks! I'm so happy that you enjoyed my poem! Thanks for the encouragement!
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