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Reviews from
Matt and Jiffy Join the Army 6

the further adventures of Matt and Jiffy

  15 total reviews 
Comment by
Iza Deleanu
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  134 (+1)
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  68
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  9
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  9
 

#9 Ranked Novelist
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Quite intrigued by this script, are the prospects missing something in the intelligence department? Anyway the effect of the conversation is quite hilarious:"
Jiffy: Is this Fort Sill, Oklahoma a fort named after someone called Sill in the state of Oklahoma?

Matt: Isn't that where Geronimo is buried?

Prospect 1: Is Oklahoma a state or a musical?

Prospect 2: Does Fort Sill come after Turd Sill and before Fit Sill?

Sergeant: (Staring blankly out to nowhere) Yes to all of your questions. Now load up and God have mercy on your souls.

All of the young people file onto the bus. It departs.
"
Thank you for sharing and good luck with the next writing.


 Comment Written 04-May-2020



reply by the author on 04-May-2020
    Thanks, Iza
Comment by
January L'Angelle
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  38
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  40
Review Stars
  Rank:  17
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This sergeant is the most patient sergeant that I've ever heard of. LOL. He's got a funny line at the end of this script section. I continue to be engaged with Matt and Jiffy. -January L.


 Comment Written 04-May-2020



reply by the author on 04-May-2020
    Thanks, January.
Comment by
RickFeb49
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
 
 
Poor
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
When I enlisted in the Air Force and made it a career the scenario you have presented is a ridiculous one. If you are making fun of inductees and military personnel, I find it offensive.

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.


 Comment Written 04-May-2020



reply by the author on 04-May-2020
    I spent twenty-two years in the Marines, Rick. If you want to rate my scene on grammar, spelling, structure or some other legitimate review criteria I will give you an opportunity to review this again after reading scenes 1-5 and 7. Otherwise I will just mute you. In the future if you don?t like a piece, skip it. Your score of one star doesn?t affect my average as everyone knows that only newbies rate like that and your rating is eliminated.
Comment by
susand3022
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  27
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  27
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  32
Script Rating
  Rank:  8
Review Stars
  Rank:  15
 

#8 Ranked Script Writer
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
God Bless us, everyone... we're going to need it with that crew at the helm! Stripes comes to mind... lol You always make me laugh so hard... Fort Still, come after Turd and before Fit... do get buzzed before you write? LOL


 Comment Written 03-Mar-2020



reply by the author on 03-Mar-2020
    Hugs not drugs, Susan. Thanks for the fantastic comments. Bill

reply by susand3022 on 04-Mar-2020
    I just wondered... because sometimes you're so silly, I thought maybe half a bottle of wine was involved, or a half a joint or something... lol

reply by the author on 04-Mar-2020
    Maybe there?s a gas leak.
Comment by
thaities, Rebecca V.
Premier Author
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  Rank:  8
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  Rank:  7
 

#8 Ranked Author
Excellent
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Young people! Some can tax even the most patient people. This is a strange group of raw recruits that will definitely give the higher ups a run for their money. Good post.


 Comment Written 02-Mar-2020



reply by the author on 02-Mar-2020
    Thanks, thaities, for the fun review. Bill
Comment by
BethShelby
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  80
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  53
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  Rank:  7
Review Stars
  Rank:  18
 

#7 Ranked Novelist
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This is an example of characters signing up for the Army to defend all of us, God need to have mercy on all of us. This is a funny script. Nice comic writing.


 Comment Written 01-Mar-2020



reply by the author on 01-Mar-2020
    Thanks, Beth
Comment by
nomi338
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  146 (+14)
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  126
 
Excellent
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There is not enough money in this world to make me want to be the sergeant over Prospect numbers one and two. These two gems could turn a sergeant's hair gray overnight.


 Comment Written 01-Mar-2020



reply by the author on 01-Mar-2020
    It actual only takes minutes.

reply by nomi338 on 01-Mar-2020
    Sounds like you've been down that road a time or two. LOL.
Comment by
Mistydawn
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  Rank:  13
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  Rank:  73
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Poor sergeant, being tormented that way. He took it all in good stride. He was probably thinking ten minutes and your not my problem any more. That's what I'd think, anyhow. Your script is well-written, very realistic. Nice job.


 Comment Written 01-Mar-2020



reply by the author on 01-Mar-2020
    Thank you,MD
Comment by
2018 Poet of the Year
Gloria ....
2014 - #365 Poet of the Year
2014 - #56 Author of the Year
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  15
Author Rating For Short Works
 
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Review Stars
  Rank:  30
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Haaa, this is just hilarious. How did you manage to think up all those questions? I really like the flying buses, do we get to fly on one too?

Great fun Bill and I got a few laughs.

Gloria


 Comment Written 29-Feb-2020



reply by the author on 29-Feb-2020
    Thanks, Gloria. All flying buses are grounded.
Comment by
Teri7
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  19
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  19 (+2)
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  
 Rank:  13
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Bill, This is a very cute and comical script about these guys heading to their stop. You used very cute and entertaining words. I enjoyed reading and reviewing this. Blessings, Teri


 Comment Written 29-Feb-2020



reply by the author on 29-Feb-2020
    Thanks, Teri

reply by Teri7 on 29-Feb-2020
    you are so welcome!
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