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5-7-5 Poem
Deadline: Tomorrow!

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Deadline: In 6 Days

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Deadline: Jul 22nd

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Deadline: Jul 24th

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Rank

Poet: None
Author: None
Novel: None
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Reviews from
When The Narrative Must Remain


Would you be in the crowd or on the tracks...

  10 total reviews 
Comment by
giraffmang
Level 2 Pro
2018 2nd for short works
2017 Author of the year
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  203
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  17
Author Rating For Novels
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  132
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Hi there,

Well, replace collars with face masks and there we go. Right in the here and now....

very nice little piece. You don't need to know all the ins and outs as the theme is relevant and clear.

Good job
GMG


 Comment Written 21-May-2020



reply by the author on 21-May-2020
    Thank you, GMG, for taking the time to review this short story - if anyone understands that the words on the page aren't always what they actually appear to be, it would be you. ;) :) Much appreciated! :) Yvette
Comment by
Robert Zimmerman
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  36
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  9
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  40
 

#9 Ranked Author
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Hello Yvette. Very nicely done. I like reading this kind of stuff. I would have voted for yours but I had to vote for mine. It's a good thing I voted for mine or I wouldn't have had any. Hahaha. I was sure I couldn't win but I had to make a statement on this one. Your statement was loud and clear. I appreciate it.

Da Z. :;-)))


 Comment Written 20-May-2020



reply by the author on 20-May-2020
    Thanx so much for those awesome stars, Z -- I knew this one probably would come out on top, but as soon as I did a cut/paste of the 'opening phrase' to my Word Doc, this literally just poured out from the keyboard - it was a 'flash' fiction for a whole 'nother reason! LOL! :) ;) I will pop back in there and take a look at yours... :) Take care out there and soak in some sunshine! ;) Yvette
Comment by
Jeffrey L. Michaux
Jeff Michaux
Williamsburg
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  30
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  41
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
I don't understand the need for the collars. If it was to control them to conform to some crazy ungodly leadership, then, count me among the collarless. I like the message conveyed in this and enjoyed reading this well written work. Well done!


 Comment Written 19-May-2020



reply by the author on 19-May-2020
    The need for the collars wasn't necessary for the story. ;) ;) 😉 Thank you so much for your review!!
Comment by
Patty Palmer
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  85
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  36
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  80
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Great story! It took a turn that I didn't expect. Kind of scary when you think of life maybe going that direction itself. The protestors are only making a statement, don't take away our freedom! Good luck with the contest.
Patty


 Comment Written 19-May-2020



reply by the author on 19-May-2020
    Thank you so much for your time and your review. Scary, indeed.
Comment by
Gypsy Blue Rose
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  9
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  12
 

#9 Ranked Poet
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Hello my friend

A beautiful flash fiction story for the Short Story(150 words) writing contest. Good word count. Nice characters development. Smooth story and great ending. Well done.


 Comment Written 19-May-2020



reply by the author on 19-May-2020
    Great ending? Okay... ;) :) Thank you so much for your time and your review!! :)

reply by Gypsy Blue Rose on 19-May-2020
    It was a good ending for the story. Should I have said terrible ending?

reply by the author on 19-May-2020
    Naaaah... just giving you a hard time, Gypsy... :) :) Take care, my lady! ;)

reply by Gypsy Blue Rose on 19-May-2020
    Thank you :)
Comment by
Shirley McLain
Premier Author
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  56
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  126
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  26
Review Stars
  Rank:  75
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
I think your story is life right now. Those who live or die make a conscious choice except for the ones caught because they got to close to the virus. Great job and I didn't find any errors. Good luck in the contest. Shirley


 Comment Written 19-May-2020



reply by the author on 19-May-2020
    Thank you for both your time and your review. Both are very appreciated.
Comment by
2018 Poet of the Year
Gloria ....
2014 - #365 Poet of the Year
2014 - #56 Author of the Year
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  14
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  31
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Definitely a spooky story illustrating how the powers that be will ensure a myth will survive whether it is valid or not.

You've adhered to the contest guidelines well and the artwork is an inspired choice for your entry.

Best of luck to you in the voting booth. :)

Gloria


 Comment Written 18-May-2020



reply by the author on 18-May-2020
    Thank you for your time and your review. Both are appreciated!
Comment by
royowen
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  1
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Review Stars
  
 
 Rank:  1
 

#1 Ranked Poet!

#1 Ranked Reviewer!
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
I love this, there's nothing like a bit of authoritarianism to enforce a law, not like someone carrying a gun to enforce their right to "freedom" heh heh, but then, what is freedom? Well done, blessings, Roy


 Comment Written 18-May-2020



reply by the author on 18-May-2020
    Thank you for your time and your review. Both are appreciated.

reply by royowen on 18-May-2020
    My pleasure
Comment by
w.j.debi
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  111 (+1)
Author Rating For Short Works
 
Author Rating For Novels
  Rank:  15
Review Stars
  Rank:  67
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
Lots of drama and concern in this story. I can see this being the start of a dystopian novel where society is so messed up that it needs to be saved.
Best of luck in the contest.


 Comment Written 18-May-2020



reply by the author on 18-May-2020
    Your time and your review are appreciated. Thank you!

reply by w.j.debi on 20-May-2020
    I had to see who wrote this one so I checked this morning. Great job Yvette. I really liked this one.
Comment by
LisaMay
Premier Author
Premier Reader
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  12
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  1
Author Rating For Novels
 
Script Rating
 
Review Stars
  Rank:  26
 

#1 Ranked Author!
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
What a horribly chilling story - it may be fiction but it sounds too close for comfort to present day fact. Misguided presidential power, the huddled masses preferring to live and die on their own terms, the compliant, collared/masked? ones, watching other people die for entertainment, or being forced to... all with a current of fear and control, with truth unheeded. Scary.


 Comment Written 18-May-2020



reply by the author on 18-May-2020
    Aaaah, a reader/reviewer that truly reads... Thank you so much, LisaMay. Your comments and those stars are more appreciated than you will know. Have a great evening!

reply by LisaMay on 18-May-2020
    It's morning here, so I'll have a great morning instead! I am so pleased my review was appreciated.
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