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Reviews from
Before The Touch


If you've been there, you know...

  78 total reviews 
Comment by
Patty Palmer
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Poet Rating
  Rank:  83 (+4)
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  Rank:  43
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Review Stars
  Rank:  121
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
A well written poem. If fate brings two together, don't ruin tomorrow by trying to figure out the past. Take it for what it is and for as long as it lasts. The picture and the orange background pulled it all together. Great job!
Patty


 Comment Written 13-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 13-Oct-2020
    Thanks Patty. Indeed, many a relationship has been cut short because we've projected past experiences and nursed a bruise heart. Likewise, many are fearful of trusting their truest selves to today--worrying about what may happen in the future. Carpe Diem has never applied more importantly than in immersing ourselves in this day, this moment! Many Thanks--Karenina
Comment by
Mary Furlong
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  Rank:  439
 
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A lovely poem and so true. Youth is indeed wasted on the young. 'Every moment shared fulfills a need' is my favorite of all these lovely lines. Thanks so much for sharing.


 Comment Written 13-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 13-Oct-2020
    That line seems to have resonated with quite a few reviewers. Perhaps because simple truths are global and eternal...
    Perhaps the need is to learn and grow, or to discover our strength in surviving a lost love...
    Perhaps the need is to open our hearts and not let fears of rejection keep us from giving out most sincere and loving effort to each relationship.
    Things so many of us learn with age!

    Thank you--Karenina
Comment by
djsaxon
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Poet Rating
  Rank:  157 (+1)
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Review Stars
  Rank:  128
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Awesome. and impeccable Shakespearean sonnet format on all levels. Great use of the language, a subtle volta, and the couplet resolution is perfect. I'm guessing I like this a lot LOL. DJ


 Comment Written 13-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 13-Oct-2020
    Hey DJ? Your review is as encouraging as it is succinct! Made me smile, to be sure! Thanks!--Karenina
Comment by
ExperiencingLiphe
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  Rank:  234
 
Excellent
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This reminded me of my childhood friend and I. Our relationship has changed and matured. For Christmas presents and stuff we've started asking for days off together doing things instead of things. You did a great job with this


 Comment Written 12-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 12-Oct-2020
    Thank you! About everyone but a rare few assumed this applied solely to married couples getting on in years! In fact the original spark that inspired me was, for me, a friend who has grown along with me in depth and respect and affection...very important indeed. As we mature we are fortunate to have someone who knows our past and does not judge, enjoys our present but does not push, and without whom the future would surely seem bleak! Great review! Many Thanks--Karenina
Comment by
rama devi
May All Beings Be Happy
 
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 Rank:  184
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Life's treasures do not come to us in youth.

This line contains an essay between the words! Eloquently voiced


The imagery and message of the closing couplet (which has a unique and SUPERB rhyme pair and voicing) nudges this to a six in spite of one nit in meter noted below. Also, all the phrasing phonics and fluid flow are top notch. Great rhymes.


The one line I stumble on, rhythmically speaking:

Rather, let us enjoy the time we've got...

Of course, metrical substitution is allowed, but it does not work well here, read aloud. I suggest making that line truly iambic by placing a one syllable word before RATHER and the using a contraction. Example:

But rather, let 's enjoy the time we've got...


I love this stanza's import and voicing:



We learn with age that intimacy's truth.

It's far afield from passion's throes and such.

Life's treasures do not come to us in youth,

perhaps we'll find them now, before the touch?



My favorite lines are the closing couplet for the meaning, the imagery and the musicality as well as the awesome rhyme!

A cabin, autumn leaves, a rustic porch?

Two rocking chairs, two souls, an unlit torch...


I wanted to give this a six in spite of that one nit, because it's one of my favorite of yours!

Tender, rich in meaning, musical... and memorable too.

Warmly, rd


 Comment Written 12-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 12-Oct-2020
    Ah, one other noted that very nit and suggested I refine for pentameter...which I meant to do immediately and then got side-tracked.

    I look to you as a paragon of wisdom regarding all things poetic and thus I am especially leased with your comprehensive review, your most encouraging words and you suggestion for editing that line!--

    So pleased this is one of your favorites of my postings! It stated out rough but for once I didn't rush it... each day I read and refined a bit more.

    I was at a loss for closing envoi and then awakened with these very words ready for placement!

    I'm honored. (I will edit NOW!)

    Thank you, more than you know... Karenina

reply by rama devi on 12-Oct-2020
    AW, thanks for your gracious response, dear and high esteem too! I love when the muse sleeps on it and wakes up ready!

    Warmly, rd
Comment by
Nicole Mendiola
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  331 (+1)
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
I really enjoyed reading this. It painted a perfect picture of two people appreciating the moments they have in the now and cherishing life's good times. Very awesome.


 Comment Written 12-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 12-Oct-2020
    How very generous of you to say so! It is so important to live in the moment, I think. I am learning more each day to awaken and not assume I have a right to another dawn! Thanks for reviewing!--Karenina

reply by Nicole Mendiola on 18-Oct-2020
    Yes so very true. Keep up the great work.
Comment by
Ric Myworld
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  Rank:  81
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
I'm not sure I've ever been there before, or not quite in the same way. I mean, in the blind, over such a distance, the silence almost deafening. Straining for a whisper in the white noise. Captivated by written words, longing for a hiss, hum, or a moan. Kicking through the leaves, my sweaty palms, cold feet's perfect touch. You picked some of these thoughts right out of my brain. But wrote them more eloquently than I ever could have.
Great job!


 Comment Written 12-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 12-Oct-2020
    Oh, I would bet on you to be more eloquent...
    Still, there is a certain surrender of control when one is overcome by
    an awakening, a sense of being so alive...
    Like free floating upon gentle undulating waves in the sea, not worrying about direction or destiny.
    Such things are gifts to any human heart...
    Mere thank you is not enough...

    Karenina

reply by Ric Myworld on 13-Oct-2020
    I don't understand how I seem to relate you everything you say. I used to spend many early mornings taking a nap, floating in the waves. Friends thought I was crazy, but I was free. I still don't have time to read your email and reply. Hopefully I can by tonight. You make me smile!

reply by the author on 13-Oct-2020
    You make me smile as well. I've given up discerning why. I enjoy floating in the early morning "waves" as well. I used to try to dissect just why that was. Now I am thankful for the experience and excited to discover the "unbearable lightness of being."-- Don't worry! Read when you can!--K
Comment by
Gypsy Blue Rose
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Poet Rating
  Rank:  15
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Review Stars
  Rank:  22
 
Excellent
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Before The Touch
by karenina

Hello, Karenina,

I love your love poem. It's a lovely thought...to grow old together. The presentation is beautiful. I like the imagery.


 Comment Written 12-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 12-Oct-2020
    Thank you! I am so backed up on reviews you've likely written a hundred poems I've yet to feast on! I'm slowly getting back in the groove. I appreciate your kind words and will be there to return the favor soon.--Karenina
Comment by
Teri7
Premier Author
Teresa Shortess
 
Poet Rating
  Rank:  64 (+1)
Author Rating For Short Works
  Rank:  22
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Review Stars
  
 Rank:  47
 
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted
This is a very beautiful and very well worded poem you have penned. You used very good descriptive words with beautiful imagery from the art work you chose. Thanks for sharing. love, Teri


 Comment Written 12-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 12-Oct-2020
    I am thrilled this poem seems to have resonated with so many. All the more so because I have been in a dry spell and have not posted in awhile. Thank you for receiving it so well!--Karenina
Comment by
Joan E.
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 Rank:  218
 
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level
Thank you for reminding us of the benefits of maturity. I enjoyed your rhymed sonnet and dramatic, autumn artwork. Your final couplet describes a peaceful life. Cheers- Joan


 Comment Written 12-Oct-2020



reply by the author on 12-Oct-2020
    I struggled with this poem...it has morphed with a dozen endings. Suddenly the final couplet floated onto the page and I was happy at last with the effort. (As happy as writer's ever get!)---Someone once said writing poetry is studying a poem for hours then inserting a comma---only to remove it hours later! Thanks my friend, Karenina

reply by Joan E. on 12-Oct-2020
    I sometimes have the same struggles. I am delighted you were finally satisfied with your effort. More cheers- Joan
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