My Comments

Good

Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a cute poem that describes these messy birds very sweetly. But I fail to see how this is a haiku considering the syllable count. It should be 5-7-5, but yours goes way over that at each line. Hence the four rating! Hope this helps rather than upsets!

Comment Written by Gypsymooncat on 28-Feb-2020

Why Do Birds Fly?

Excellent

You have far more courage than I do my friend! I have often wondered why people:
Hang glide
Jump out of planes
Bungee jump
Parasail (although that may be something I possibly MIGHT consider doing)
Ride roller coasters and other ridiculously scary rides (I've had a few experiences on these rides and I end up sick as a dog every time. And cryin' lol)

As for why birds fly, I do believe you've answered that question for us, in your usual, skilful and creative way. The one thing I got a bit stuck on, was in the first stanza where "that" is repeated three times in the last two lines. The only suggestion I can make - which I don't know if it suits the meter - is to say "That is something that I...thought I would never try".

I'm also pointing that out, because an editor who used to write/review on here, said that over-use of the word "that" and other words like "the", etc., should be avoided as much as possible. I've never forgotten that advice! I know my suggestion probably might not help, or you may not agree, and that is fine.

I enjoyed how you describe the hang-gliding and draw the analogy between it and why birds fly. I have to say, when I'm in a plane, looking out the window, I love the sight of the clouds, the sky, the ground way down below...but even more, I love the sight of the city at night from way up there.

Why do they fly? Because they can! And because they inspire poets to write wonderful poems like this one. All the best in the voting! xoxoxoxoxoxo

Comment Written by Gypsymooncat on 27-Feb-2020
Read and reviewed with blinders on.

reply by the author on 28-Feb-2020

Don't let me fool you, Chris. I've often stated my religion as "devout coward." I don't (and won't) hang glide, jump out of planes or bungee jump. I have parasailed twice, and zip lined a few times, including a canopy tour atop a mountain and through the treetops. I only ride roller coasters under duress, and never with my eyes open and my hands in the air. Rather it's with my eyes closed tightly, and my hands clinging, white-knuckled, to the safety bar. I don't to the other scary, nausea-inducing rides. I do wind up on some of the spinning ones simply because Leah likes them and wants company, but I've taught myself to use the dance technique of spot turns (keeping your eyes focused on the same spot until it's impossible to do so) to lessen the risk of nausea. Dizziness, however, is a totally different story.

Thanks for that note that I overused that word "that." (Did I really use that word that much?) Actually, I hadn't realized that I'd done that, which is surprising as I'd mentioned that my previous employer was a stickler for not repeating words. I'm changing it to
That is something which I
thought that I?d never try.
I really appreciate that you pointed that out, and there was no need to downplay your suggestion the way you did.

I'm glad you enjoyed the way I described the hang gliding. That was based mostly on my first parasailing experience. I was scared to death at the prospect, and absolutely didn't want to go, but I was on a cruise with a friend who gave into me on the type of vacation we were taking, so I gave into her on the parasailing. Once I was in the air, all the fear disappeared and it truly did feel as though I were flying. Of course, the second time I parasailed it was an extremely windy day, and I was being bounced around horribly, so I was concentrating less on the feeling of flying and more on trying not to vomit on the people in the boat below me. Like you, I also love flying through the clouds and looking at the land below, but the parasailing gave me much more of a feeling of flying like a bird.

Thanks, as always, for your kind, wonderful and supportive comments. I needed that right now, since the review before your only gave me four stars for doing more telling than showing. At least he did it politely, though. xoxoxo

Waiting for my Dearest Friend by Aaron Milavec

Excellent

This is a lovely way to describe the coming of spring. I think you adhered to the contest rules well, and delivered a strong entry for the contest. Good luck xoxoxo

Comment Written by Gypsymooncat on 27-Feb-2020
Read and reviewed with blinders on.

Complicated Beauty by Y. M. Roger

Exceptional

This work has reached the exceptional level

Bravo Bravo Bravo anonymous poet!!

This was a breathtaking poem, so perfect in every way, and I just LOVED it. The repetition of "water falling from the sky" adds a certain lilt to the tone and additional depth, and made it go from great to exceptional. Good luck xoxoxoxoxo

Comment Written by Gypsymooncat on 27-Feb-2020
Read and reviewed with blinders on.

Hatred by easyeverett

Exceptional

I left the church after being confirmed because of bigotry and hypocrisy. I was 14. I'm not saying those two things only exist within religion, but having experienced both, I went out into the world determined to not let either affect me or influence me. Sadly, I was often too weak to fight those who dealt that shit out.

The meek shall inherit the earth. Not the bigot or the hypocrite.

Love your mastery and artistry, as always Sir Easy. You are an inspiration and an education.

Love your work! xoxo

Comment Written by Gypsymooncat on 27-Feb-2020

Senseless by JP Writer

Excellent

No open wound here...I thought this was a fabulous free verse, and also an equally fabulous entry in the contest. You really draw the reader in, and keep the attention, which is always a wonderful achievement in poetry and writing in general. If you turn out work like this when you're tired, I'd be very interested to see what your turn out when you feel energised lol! Good luck in the votes xoxoxox

Comment Written by Gypsymooncat on 24-Feb-2020
Read and reviewed with blinders on.

A Tale of One Story by Michele Harber

Exceptional

As always, you lead the reader along, captivated, than whack them with your closing line.

You have a way of writing where the reader thinks "this is good", but when the climax is reached, that reader says "that was EXCELLENT".

Poor Jason learned a valuable lesson, didn't he? Shame works when nothing else will.

This is a terrific entry, sure to be a winner! Good luck my fine friend xoxoxo

PS: your title is also bloody clever!

Comment Written by Gypsymooncat on 24-Feb-2020

reply by the author on 24-Feb-2020

Thank you, Chris! In all honesty, I wrote this a few weeks back, specifically for this contest, but I've been afraid to enter it because I wasn't sure it was strong enough. I never expected a six, and was dreading the possibility of fours (which, I'm happy to say, I haven't gotten), so I'm particularly thrilled with this. With a few exceptions, the postings I'm most happy with get the more mediocre comments, and the ones I'm unsure of get the most favorable ones. Thank you for letting me cast all my fears about this story aside. (By the way, the one thing I was really proud of was the title, so thanks for pointing that out.)