The Dark City
Chapter 9 of the book Dark shades of evil
A good chapter. Interesting with good pacing. I enjoyed it.
A few suggestions:
---"Dear, boy, we are going to use it to camouflage ourselves in it.
I suggest that you remove 'in it'. Also do not think the comma between dear and boy is needed.
---It is capable of hiding us all in it.
Suggest you remove 'in it'.
---One of use (us) will be in the front to see where we are going; I suggest that person be Magda."
Thanks for a great read.
Comment Written by Ducorse on 04-Oct-2013