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n.rosej.

Long Shadows Dance by Dean Kuch

Excellent
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This is a perfect halloween poem. The meter, rhyme and words all flowed together so well, it came across to me like a 'song'.
Comment Written by n.rosej. on 12-Oct-2015

Baby Boy by RYME4U

Excellent
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This is a touching poem. I can 'feel' the emotion of love through your words. It moves well with a different, bittersweet meter. Love it.
Comment Written by n.rosej. on 12-Oct-2015

Unsaved Irony by Dean Kuch

Excellent
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Good limerick, and I hope you did well in the contest. Rhythm moves well, subject matter is well chosen and good message. Hats off!
Comment Written by n.rosej. on 12-Oct-2015

My New Fishin' Pole by michaelcahill

Excellent
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LOLOLOL Quite to the point, with much humor indeed! Love this M.Cahill; good rhyming limerick! Not sure if the contest is over or not, but good luck to you!
Comment Written by n.rosej. on 12-Oct-2015

70 years on since Anne Frank wrote by Jackarrie
Chapter 6 of the book Poetry

Excellent
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This is a fantastic and moving poem. The subject matter is so important, especially when 'todays' generation is saying that the Holocaust did not happen. Hats off!!
Comment Written by n.rosej. on 09-Oct-2015

Glory To The Lamb by Sankey
Chapter 4 of the book Geoff's "Really Truly" Carols.

Excellent
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This is quite wonderful! I love the lyrics;
what a wonderful way to give glory to the
Lord, thru worship, and writing your own
songs! Blessings : )
Comment Written by n.rosej. on 09-Nov-2013

Emotions by Nevermore713

Excellent
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Wonderful! This flows very well, and its message is clear
from beginning to end. BRAVO!! A pic may enhance, just an
idea. The only line that needs a 'tiny' refine, is the
long one...
"The way my heart skipped a beat when we shared our first kiss"
Could be made into two lines...?
Sorry you are going thru some confusion right now. Will hold you in prayer, for discernment. Blessings my friend : )
Comment Written by n.rosej. on 09-Nov-2013

@ Last by kissesafterdark

Average
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I love the 'love' that is reflected in this poem. The writer's feelings are clear in its message. However, this does need some refining.

First, this needs to be broken into 'stanza's'. The way
it is presented, it's format, makes the poem hard to stay
focused, and throws off any 'flow'.

Second, there needs to be more punctuation, especially
some periods. Without any punctuation, it makes the poem
'ramble', and this doesn't give it the justice it deserves.

Put the dedication, in the 'advanced editor' section.
Here is just an example of how it could read better. I've changed some wording, added/deleted. It's still all your work and choice; I only try to suggest, and help. I would omit the explanation of dejavu, and the end part could also be eliminated, or possibly, put in the 'authors notes' section. Also, using text language, like 'u' instead of 'you', does not work well in poetry. It's better to spell out the words. If you decide to change anything, let me know. I would be happy to re-review and change my rating. You have a good talent! Keep writing!! I applaud you taking the 'step out'. I'm also glad that you have found such a wonderful man! Blessings : )

"Have u ever meet someone and instantly had DeJa Vu?
I'll have and you know how the saying goes...

I've meet the man of my dreams,
He remained faceless for some time;
Then came the day that I was blessed,
His eyes were so sublime.

It was incredible, you see,
How he walked out of my dreams...
And right into our lives,
I'm honored to be his queen.

To spend the rest of my life in love,
Unconditionally, you see...
The kind of love we share,
Did not come so easily.

We weathered out the storms,
And we danced out in the rain...
We held on tight thru the heartache's,
And through all of our life's pain...

Only thru God's Grace,
Did we make all our amends...
Were we able to be sustained,
And remain the best of friends."




Comment Written by n.rosej. on 09-Nov-2013

Come out of Your Shell by Waishali Deshmukh

Good
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I like this poem, but it needs a little tweaking.
Lines 1,3,and 4 flow well. Line 2 and 5 need a minor
change in words.
For example, line 5,
"Come out of shell my dear friend"
Should read: "Come out of your shell my friend"
(omit'dear')(add 'your')
Line 2,
"No time to look at and be merry"
Should read: "No time to notice and be merry"
(omit 'look at') (add 'notice and')

Great topic, because we do indeed, make
or break our own happiness. If you decide to change
anything, let me know and I will change my rating.
Hope this helps. Blessings : )

Comment Written by n.rosej. on 09-Nov-2013

Christmas Eve by harmony13

Excellent
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Lovely, short and sweet. Good rhyme and flow, and great way to give our Lord recognition and glory! Love the line, "A mystical Christmas Eve Snowflakes falling on the trees"
Comment Written by n.rosej. on 10-Nov-2013


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