Church Children
A story in the form of a poem
Pays: 8 points.
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Quillian

Tip for Writers #9 by EMB
Chapter 9 of the book Tips to Treasure

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Good advise, I agree with your Facebook line for socializing and ignoring sniper reviewers! You put down the truths we all know, BUT have to be reminded of constantly. Thanks for the reminder....
Comment Written by Quillian on 17-Sep-2013

THE GAME by lancellot

Excellent
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Cute. Very cute. I don't know a woman alive who would read this and not have a big grin on her face. You hit a lot of married life in this short piece, sharing the telly, sports and the ongoing sweet battle of the sexes...
Comment Written by Quillian on 17-Sep-2013

Shadow From Our Past by Selina Stambi
Chapter 9 of the book With This Dance

Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

A lovely, lyrical and bittersweet tale of a glimpse into the past. I loved this concept. To see yourselves and to celebrate in this couples joi de vivre was a double treat. Great tile, too. Here's my 6......Quillian
Comment Written by Quillian on 17-Sep-2013

The Benefits of Reading by denhagan

Excellent
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Love the photo! Can't be enough encouragement about reading. 'Opening new worlds, aid you in seeing a better (or different) point of view, give you more variety, etc. All good reasons.
Comment Written by Quillian on 07-Sep-2013

When WANTS became RIGHTS by lancellot

Excellent
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Love this. Your sharing your response to the blood pressure raising radio program will resonate with a lot of your readers. Your explanation of why you had this response, was good, your telling of how you were raised; taught responsibility, paid for the consequences of making bad choices and were not showered with accolades when you did the right thing tells it all.I have only one suggestion. Do NOT listen to talk radio on the way to work.
Comment Written by Quillian on 07-Sep-2013
Read and reviewed with blinders on.

AIDS, The Legend by Jean C Chimfwembe

Excellent
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Some excellent images here; shoulders hanging, my spirit in Zion, the devouring vulture, asking for a chair, all building the picture of a body ransacked with this devastating disease. I also thought your notes were powerful, with a thank you for the help, and the words about Francis and Bernard.Good photo, good poem.
Comment Written by Quillian on 07-Sep-2013
Read and reviewed with blinders on.

Emblem of love by bkbehera

Good
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I thought emblem and insignia was a good way to tie your title and first line together. That first line of your second stanza seems a bit too long, even though you have tried to shorten it by dropping 'a' tale and 'the' core. I would suggest reworking that a bit. I liked 'you are my guide and philosopher'.
In my opinion, your romance poem has some good bones, but needs a little polishing and tightening. Work on that second stanza a bit, poetry, like love, needs attention, Right?!
Comment Written by Quillian on 07-Sep-2013
Read and reviewed with blinders on.

Lambs to Slaughter by catch22

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A dark, brooding warning. Good choice of artwork. The words you chose to convey the evil of the devil's henchman/men were excellent:
'dressed in altruistic clothing, waiting to draw first blood, banging the gavel (my favorite) and the guttural growl. Also,,striping your skin down to bone white truth was visceral. I liked this very much, but Poet, what big teeth you have ...Quillian
Comment Written by Quillian on 07-Sep-2013

Like It Was Yesterday by Terror2s

Excellent
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Glory Days! I love your story that helped set you on the path of writing! A lesson for all our readers, both young and old about the power of the pen. I see you reached all time best with this, congratulations......
Comment Written by Quillian on 06-Sep-2013

The Day I Became a Man by lancellot

Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

What a great story and you fully deserved the win. I love these coming of age story's and yours had all the realism and truth of the great ones. Beautiful, wise Jenny, the neighborhood gang and the day laborers are such accomplished characters in such a short story, I admire that. You are a fine writer.........
Comment Written by Quillian on 06-Sep-2013


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