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Petriesan

The preacher by mahmudelvis

Good
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I aim making two assumptions. First, that you are pretty young and second, that English may not be your first language. So, pay attention to punctuation and sentence structure. I liked what I read, but it was hard to stay with
Comment Written by Petriesan on 27-Jun-2014

The Short Busy Life Of A Mayfly by Domino 2

Excellent
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Mazing on the first day off life? The only creature I can think of in a similar star was rocky of the rocky horror picture show... Aid he also died at the end of his first day. ?...... hmmm mmmmmm

well executed piece
Comment Written by Petriesan on 27-Jun-2014
Read and reviewed with blinders on.

Reflection by Chocolate Chip

Excellent
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The problem with us trying to determine the right or wrong is that we cannot seperate our backgro u nd from our beliefs. It's not that we are to o rushed to see, but that we just cannot.

Nice piece
Comment Written by Petriesan on 27-Jun-2014

haiku (turquoise, sapphire sea) by N.K. Wagner

Excellent
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Looks like magens Bay. St Thomas is a beautiful place and the water is absolutely incredible. Very nice piece done in tribute.
Comment Written by Petriesan on 27-Jun-2014

Flip the Coin by judy.gordon

Excellent
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You are correct, but too many think giving their life to God means focusing on their spiritual navels and finding sin in others. We could all benefit by internalizing the prayer of St. Francis, one of the best piece s of purpose in the world. Good piece
Comment Written by Petriesan on 27-Jun-2014

haiku (dandelion) by Norbanus

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Love dandelions. They are really so pretty. Good for salads and teas. Not everyone likes them though... what must mother nature think? Nice haiku
Comment Written by Petriesan on 27-Jun-2014

haiku (wind scatters) by IndianaIrish

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In my town, there is a conspicuous Manson with about twenty acres of dandelion-free lawn that makes me want to take a bushel basket of them to the place and let nature do her thing. Evil, huh?

I liked your piece
Comment Written by Petriesan on 27-Jun-2014

Gift Card Granny by Patti R.

Excellent
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Some times the gift Card is the best option, especially when the grand kiddo has pretty much every thing they need. I plan on using grandpa-Grand kiddo dates, like to the movies or the ice Cream joint. Of course I aim new at the grandpa game, so I probably have a lot to learn. None piece
Comment Written by Petriesan on 27-Jun-2014

Putrid To The Core by TheWriteTeach

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I have known many people like this. IN fact, I was raised in a similar environment. To the outside world, my parents believed we looked like the ideal loving family. But they beat us kids and fought constantly between themselves.

Too real, this poem. VEry good, even if were not a first attempt
Comment Written by Petriesan on 27-Jun-2014

That Grin by Debra White
Chapter 55 of the book Writing Prompt Entries 2014

Excellent
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Interesting form. But more than the rules, I like the spey you told. I can see my granddaughter in your words, tempting Mr to play with that grin like she knows she is being cute... Does she? Nice piece
Comment Written by Petriesan on 26-Jun-2014


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