This is great! I really like the way that the voice of your narrator comes through your writing. You are able to build up a sense of tension/atmosphere and your conversations read realistically. A very minor point but I would possibly just consider varying your sentence starters a little, as quite a few currently start with 'I'. All the best and I look forward to more!
Bees are indeed so vital to the human and natural world, and you capture this very well with your thorough descriptions of how bees perform various vital functions. A beautiful tribute to the humble bee! I would possibly just add a little punctuation for clarity. Best of luck in the contest!
Comment Written by Anya Trofimova on 24-Apr-2020
Read and reviewed with blinders on.
This is a very powerful message in this short story. It's power lies in what you choose to describe as it does in what remains unsaid. I really like the way that you choose the extended metaphor of baking a recipe. Very well done and good luck in the contest!