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AJ McCall

Football Chapter 14 part 2 by barbara.wilkey
Chapter 30 of the book Football - A Novel

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Wow. I'm very surprised at this chapter; at Katherine. Poor Kathrine! I never would've imagined that she went through that. And at seventeen? That's what I am now. I'm glad Gabriel was there and is kind and gentle and sweet. I want to see what happens in the next chapter!
Comment Written by AJ McCall on 11-Apr-2021

The Wicked witch by Anne-Marie brison

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For a dribble flash fiction, this is pretty intense Brison!!! I love the story you chose though. Have you seen the movie or the play called, "The Wiz"? You should watch it if you can. I did notice one typo; you put 'you' instead of 'your'. Love the last line. Great job!!!

P.S Did you get anything for the Irish mythology story I sent you?
Comment Written by AJ McCall on 09-Apr-2021

It's All Up to Chance by camille555

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So I guess the contest judges didn't think anyone deserved the win, LOL? If I were one of them, torn between the three, I would've had the three split it! I know it's pretty hard to write a story in fifty exact words but this a very funny short story. And I particularly like these types of posts. Great job. :)

Comment Written by AJ McCall on 07-Apr-2021

Full Circle by Derrick Payton

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Aww, this is a lovely poem. I could feel the emotion especially in that last line, 'Only you could pour it'. The picture was very interesting; looks like a child and their mother. Very lovely writing.
Comment Written by AJ McCall on 07-Apr-2021

Unfair by Tanvi Pauddar

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I could understand why you feel that way Tanvi. My opinion on this: How would a ring distract you from your studies if you're just wearing it on your finger? And she's right, you could lose it but if you haven't lost any other jewelry before I agree with you.
The coffee thing... *sigh* I have to agree with your mom on this one because coffee isn't all that great for younger people. Kids like you don't need caffeine in their system. Concerning the last part, you should do what you love the most. And if you can, you should turn it into a job in the future. Even if you're mom never wore rings, just focused on studies and tells YOU, her daughter that she can't have a ring, you still must respect her answer. The reality is that people will say no even if it doesn't make sense to you. But this is a small thing, Tanvi. Trust me. There are bigger things ahead of you. Just listen to her, maybe she might change her mind. But don't do it because of that. You want to honor her. That's what I have to say. Love the new pic by the way. :)
Comment Written by AJ McCall on 07-Apr-2021

Football Chapter 14 part 1 by barbara.wilkey
Chapter 29 of the book Football - A Novel

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The other post with the picture was a little much for me, so you get two reviews. (There was nothing wrong with the pic.:) That chapter was pretty funny. And then this scene you wrote reminds me of the part in the movie 'The Meg' when the main character had been in the locker room and the Asian woman had walked in. I don't see why Katherine is so worked up about it, and she's almost (this is how I feel) that she's insulting Gabriel. He has been honest and helps her out. A LOT. But it could be because she's scared. And I want to find out what they'll be exactly saying to each other so expect another review for that next chapter you post!!!!

P.S. I noticed one error: He took the papers. "Pack-up. I'll give them to him.
(")

Comment Written by AJ McCall on 05-Apr-2021

Fire-Brand's Mercy by K. Olsen
Chapter 7 of the book She Walks in Beauty

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I absolutely love this story - the tension, the action of this scene just makes me imagine it almost in a movie form. I love the way you describe Zull and his features, and Runa because I find it hard for myself to do the same and you do it flawlessly!!!! I'll be looking forward to the next chapter - GIANTS RULE!
Comment Written by AJ McCall on 03-Apr-2021

~ Though She's Gone ~ by Jannypan (Jan)

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Aww, this is a sweet poem! Sad but lovely. I wish the best to your love Jan, if you have one, and to your family. I hope you are safe and well! Thank you for sharing this heart-touching piece!
Comment Written by AJ McCall on 29-Mar-2021

Beauty by Zoe Brown

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I haven't been to the beach in ages! Ugh! This beautiful poem is making me wish I was on one right now, walking on the sand, feeling it crunch under my toes... Your absolutely right, beauty never lost. This is a great entry. Wish you the best in the contest!
Comment Written by AJ McCall on 27-Mar-2021

Red and the Candy House by Zoe Brown

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Wow. For your first post, this is a wonderful read! This a nice spin-off o the character Red and how she didn't like being the odd one out. I loved the tone in which you used; a causal, but narrative voice I really enjoyed. I didn't see any typos. Great job!

I wanted to do something like this but mine would be a bit more serious but not taking anything away from your story, I absolutely loved it! I noticed your only fan (Anne-Marie-Brision, who I am a fan of) also enjoys your writing. Will be looking out for your future posts!!
Comment Written by AJ McCall on 27-Mar-2021


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