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November 2018
"May those who love us, love us.
And those that don't love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if He doesn't turn their hearts,
May He turn their ankles,
So we'll know them by their limping."
(an old Celtic blessing) |
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damommy:
Every man has his secret sorrows which the world knows not, and often times we call a man cold when he is only sad. -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow
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 January 17, 2021 at 3:04PM
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damommy:
Two young ladies living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away . . . Florida or the moon?" The other one turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida??????"
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January 16, 2021 at 12:13PM
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damommy:
A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the young woman behind the wheel was knitting! Realizing that she was oblivious to his
flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn, and yelled, 'PULL OVER!' 'NO!' she yelled back, 'IT'S A SCARF!'
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January 15, 2021 at 12:21PM
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| mrsmajor: That's a good one, Yvonne, but understandable.lol
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January 15, 2021 at 1:16PM
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| Anissha Blackwell1: dmommy, fantastic work of art. This is a hilahilarious.
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January 15, 2021 at 4:32PM
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edde1969: He asked her if she had any I.D.
"About WHAT?" she replied.
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January 15, 2021 at 6:46PM
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| damommy: That's a good one, too.
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January 15, 2021 at 8:47PM
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damommy:
I get most of my exercise these days from shaking my head in disbelief.
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January 14, 2021 at 1:28PM
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| Irish Rain: I know I sure do.
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January 14, 2021 at 8:13PM
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damommy:
A bored young man decided life would be more fun if he had a pet.
So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion, he finally bought a talking centipede, (100-legged bug), which came in a little white box to use for his house.
He took the box back home, found a good spot for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to church with him. So he asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to church with me today? We will have a good time." But there was no answer from his new pet. This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked again, "How about going to church with me and receive blessings?" But again, there was no answer from his new friend and pet. So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation.
The guy decided to invite the centipede one last time. This time he put his face up against the centipede's house and shouted, "Hey, in there! Would you like to go to church with me and learn about God" This time, a little voice came out of the box, "I heard you the first time! I'm putting on my shoes!"
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January 13, 2021 at 2:37PM
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Jannypan (Jan) : Hilarious! Thanks for the laugh, Yvonne
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January 13, 2021 at 4:07PM
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damommy:
A pastor recalls, "After a worship service, a mother of a fidgety seven-year-old boy told me how she finally got her son to sit still and be quiet. About halfway through the sermon, she leaned over and whispered, 'If you don't be quiet, the preacher is going to lost his place and will have to start his sermon all over again!' It worked."
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January 10, 2021 at 2:58PM
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FanStory wrote to damommy:
The Time Has Come! finished third in the contest "This Sentence Starts The Story"
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January 10, 2021 at 12:13AM
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| damommy: Thank you so much, dear friend.
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January 10, 2021 at 1:50PM
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lyenochka: Congratulations, Yvonne!!!
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January 10, 2021 at 2:43PM
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sammielwf: Congratulations on your red ribbon Damommy. It all made "cents" in the end and I really enjoyed this piece.
Sammielwf
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January 10, 2021 at 2:57PM
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| damommy: Thank you, Helen and Sammielwf. Appreciate your congratulations.
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January 10, 2021 at 3:45PM
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damommy:
Two little boys were known troublemakers, stealing everything they could get their hands, even from the church. One day a priest stopped one of the boys and asked, "Where is God?" The boy shrugged and the priest repeated, "Where is God?" The boy ran out of the cathedral crying to his home where he hid in a closet. Eventually his brother found him and asked, "What's wrong?"" The crying boy replied, "We're in trouble now! God is missing and they think we took him!"
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January 9, 2021 at 12:30PM
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| Gloria ....: Ha. This is so good. :)
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January 9, 2021 at 1:25PM
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damommy:
If a word is misspelled in the dictionary, how would we ever know?
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January 7, 2021 at 5:27PM
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Jannypan (Jan) : So true! Many times a student would remark, "How am I supposed to look it up when I can't spell it?" Even if s/he did look it up, would they know if it was correct?
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January 7, 2021 at 5:41PM
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| mrsmajor: Seriously, has that ever happened, I guess anything is possible. but really if a mistake was made, how would we know it. Well now I'm only going to use words I know how to spell...for sure!
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January 7, 2021 at 7:03PM
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damommy:
Christmas - The only time of the year you sit in front of a dead tree and eat candy out of your socks.
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January 6, 2021 at 11:57AM
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| Alli Johnston : This is the poetry I signed up for, lol
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January 7, 2021 at 4:24AM
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damommy:
Doesn't "expecting the unexpected" make the unexpected expected?
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January 4, 2021 at 1:20PM
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| Jannypan (Jan) : I unexpectedly expected to win the lottery.
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January 6, 2021 at 11:24AM
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damommy:
Don't worry about other people's opinions of you. God never told you to impress people; only to love them.
- DaveWillis.org
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January 3, 2021 at 12:05PM
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| greyson ernst: i know but is till been having amazing reviews
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January 3, 2021 at 6:18PM
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damommy:
I think I made too many New Year's resolutions this year. It took me almost a full day to break them all.
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January 2, 2021 at 9:34AM
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| Jannypan (Jan) : I did not make any this year. But what you shared was hilarious!
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January 2, 2021 at 10:07PM
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| mrsmajor: I decided not to make any this year, so that my feeling won't be hurt when I break them. I guess I just can't help myself.It's easier to make them than it is to keep them.
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January 3, 2021 at 10:26AM
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| sandramitchell: I made a new year's resolution, and so far I haven't broken it!! Mine was, I promise not to make any new years resolutions!! I've been so surprised that I've been able to keep it! :) So proud of myself. Lol.
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January 3, 2021 at 4:42PM
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damommy:
Police officer talks to a driver: Your tail light is broken, your tires must be exchanged and your bumper hangs halfway down. That will be 300 dollars.
Driver: Alright, go ahead. They want twice as much as that at the garage.
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January 1, 2021 at 8:34PM
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Jannypan (Jan) : Hilarious! Thanks for the laugh.
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January 1, 2021 at 9:12PM
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damommy:
I'm starting meetings at my house for people who have OCD. I don't have it, but I'm just hoping they'll take one look and start cleaning.
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January 1, 2021 at 1:07PM
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| Reviewing |
35
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 | Patch Quilt reached "Recognized" status. | January 11 at 8:48AM
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| The Time Has Come! finished third in the contest "This Sentence Starts The Story" | January 10 at 12:13AM
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Up For ReviewStand Out WritingAdditional Reading
